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An Abridged List of Better Names For a Dog Than ‘Story’

Over the weekend, new Morning News editor Mike Wilson finally introduced himself to readers, after a few months in town spent attending Robert Wilonsky’s son’s sporting events. In that piece, Wilson revealed that his dog — breed unidentified — is named Story.

My dude really went and named his dog Story. STORY. Like he rescued it from the Mayborn Conference. Like it has #longform on its collar. Like it divides its time between chasing squirrels and trying to write engaging ledes. Even Mike Mooney probably thinks that’s taking it too far, and he loves dogs and writing more than anyone I know. Mooney, who has a Gay Talese shirt. Story!

Here is a list of better names for a dog than Story:

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Congressman Louie Gohmert is Literally the Only Rep to Vote Against Removing the Word ‘Lunatic’ From the Federal Code

The U.S. House voted Wednesday to remove the word “lunatic” from the Federal Code. It was a move that was a long time coming, one that’s been pushed and supported by the American Psychiatric Association, the American Counseling Association, and the National Association of School Psychologists. In sum: it’s not a great thing to call […]

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Don’t Spray Me, Bro

Mayor Rawlings’ office called the TV stations yesterday to ask for their help in getting the message out about West Nile virus. We didn’t get any such call here at D HQ. But we still want to help. So here’s a helpful video. Watch. Learn. Then take a look at the spray map to see […]

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Summer DOs and DON’Ts

Summer is really, officially here. As a longtime Texan and amateur life coach, I’m here to help. DO properly hydrate. I suggest a minimum of eight 3-liter bottles of water a day. If you’re Mike Mooney, make it nine. And get a haircut. DON’T gripe too much. We’re all in this together. One “GD it […]

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How To Fix the Nasher/Museum Tower Issue

So listen, the other day I was watching Superman II and I totally came up with an idea that will fix everything. It happens toward the end of the movie, when General Zod is using his laser beam eyeballs to heat up semi trucks and make them explode. So then Superman comes in and uses […]

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