Wait, They’re Going to Pay A.C. Gonzalez How Much?

A.C. Gonazlez in an undated file photo.
A.C. Gonzazlez in an undated file photo.

When A.C. Gonzalez was named interim city manager, his salary was bumped up to $250,000 a year. Made sense — bigger job, more responsibility. When the City Council voted to remove the “interim” from his title, it stood to reason he would get another pay raise. After all, his predecessor, Mary Suhm, had been pulling in $305,000 annually. So, the City Council voted on Gonzalez’s salary today and — HOLY MOTHER OF COME ON, HE’S MAKING $400,000 A YEAR?

This is, again, a guy who by most accounts was not even close to a unanimous choice for the job. The comments from various council members and the mayor when they approved his selection sounded more like they had hired him on a probationary basis. So, sure, immediately reward that guy with a salary that outpaces the previous city manager by almost $100,000 a year. Why would you do that, gang? Wait, oh my gosh, you’re going to say it, aren’t you? No, please, I’m begging you. Anything but that. I’ll be good, I promi–

Council Member Carolyn Davis said that if Dallas wants to be a “world-class city,” it needs to pay Gonzalez accordingly.

Oh, will you please just STOP SAYING THAT. You’re making us all seem like hobos. Quick way to be a world-class city: act like it, perform like it, and stop coming up with one last thing that will finally make us one. Just be one. Or fake it until you make it. Or, how about this? Fix the stupid roads. There’s a start. Stop throwing money at bad ideas (not talking about Gonzalez here, but I’m not not talking about him). Whatever you choose, make sure you strike those three words from your vocab. Well, maybe not “city.” You might have to still use that one. Anyway, what do you have to say, Dwaine Caraway?

“You get what you pay for. We can either play ball or we can sit on the sidelines. We’re looking for a championship.”

OK. Well. That makes no real sense. Not surprised. I hear that as CLICHE. SORT OF MISHANDLED CLICHE. CLICHE. Read in the voice of a man who wears glasses that MC Hammer would call a bit too flashy. [deep breath] What about you, Vonciel Jones Hill?

“The salary should have been set at no higher than $350,000 and that may be on the high side.”

Great. You guys have made me agree with Vonciel Jones Hill. Are you happy? Does that please you? UGH. Jerks. Actually, Vonciel didn’t vote against it, so I guess we are still good. Who did vote against? Rick Callahan and Adam Medrano. So I guess I’m going to finally have to figure out who Rick Callahan is.