Kidd Kraddick in the Morning Is Talking Trash

No, Jenna of "Kidd Kraddick in the Morning," this baby didn't buy his way onto the Best Doctors list either.
No, Jenna of “Kidd Kraddick in the Morning,” this baby didn’t buy his way onto the Best Doctors list either.

My radio dial has been stuck on 106.1 FM since high school. I’ve been listening to Kidd Kraddick in the Morning since I received the keys to my first car. I listen every morning. Yes, it is different without Kidd, but Kelly, Big Al, J-Si, and Jenna, still make me feel like I’m back in my hand-me-down car; windows are down, bass up, volume set to 10 (that’s loud in my car) pulling into the parking lot filled with Escalades and Mercedes at my high school.

In reality though, I was listening to the show on my way to D Magazine Headquarters. I took on the job as the research editor back in July. Any D Best project we have falls into my lap (i.e. Best Doctors, Best Lawyers, do I need to go on?)

This morning Psycho Shannon was on talking about her recovery process after doctors found a brain tumor back in November. Sad stuff. Shannon went on to talk about the serious stuff, like her hot doctor (they’re just friends though, because Shannon is gay. Yes, Kelly asked if she was still gay since the brain tumor).

Shannon talked about how great her hot doctor was, mentioning that he was on some “best” list in some Dallas magazine. My head turned to my passenger seat like the imaginary person in the seat next to me knew that Kidd Kraddick in the Morning just indirectly talked about me on the radio. (Well, my job at least).

Then it happened. Jenna said, and I quote (OK, paraphrase. 8 a.m. was awhile ago), “Actually the doctors pay to be on that list, so that doesn’t necessarily mean he is the best, but yeah.” She even said it again, assuring Shannon that yes, they do pay to be on the list. I couldn’t believe it. Thanks Jenna! Your job isn’t real either! I heard Jenna is actually just a computerized voice and isn’t actually a real person.

You’d think that if these people actually pay to be on the list I would drive a nicer car and not live with my parents still. I mean, right? And also, what would I do at work all day if this list were just comprised of people who pay to be on it? I must just stare at all the money in my bank account.

Well, here’s the punch line: I don’t. I actually do my job, and I take it seriously. My task is to legitimately and ethically produce a list of the best doctors in Dallas. We use a peer-review voting process. We rely on the doctors’ expertise to determine who deserves to be on the list. Once the voting period is over, we send the results to an outside research firm to tally the votes. We then present the tallied list to an anonymous panel of esteemed physicians. The panel and D staff reviews the results and decides on the finalists based on the number of votes in each category. After the list is finalized, I make sure that each doctor’s Texas medical license status is in good standing, and I investigate his or her disciplinary status. Once the list is finalized, it is handed off to the sales department. They invite the winning doctors to purchase advertisement profiles in the magazine. These are labeled as “paid advertising.” Whether a doctor buys an ad or not has no bearing on the list.

If you skipped over that last paragraph, I will summarize. You cannot pay to be on the Best Doctors list. These doctors earn their way on the list. And hey, obviously they aren’t bad either. I’m happy to see Psycho Shannon is doing better.

Gotta go back to counting my money (er, I mean doing my job).