Rich Dentist Who Has No Shot of Beating John Cornyn Attempting To Beat John Cornyn

David Alameel ran for Congress last year. He spent $4.5 million. He finished fourth out of 11 candidates in the Democratic primary. In a move that I almost respect, now he’s running for U.S. Senate against incumbent John Cornyn.

I’m not telling anyone how to spend their money. If I were wealthy, I would be funding ridiculous prop bets and so on. Essentially, I would be a real life version of Guy Grand, the hero of Terry Southern’s novel, The Magic Christian. Actually, OK, I am going to tell Alameel how to spend his money: don’t run for Senate, Dave. You’re probably not going to win, and based on this quote — “I’ll just do whatever it takes. Money is not an issue for me.” — you are going to spend a ton of cash to not win. I mean, you just lost last year, and it wasn’t really close. Maybe help fund someone who can win, if you have to get involved. Or just give me enough money to put Tim Rogers in a variety of precarious situations.

Read This Next