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About That Maritime Museum on the Trinity

As Jason mentioned in Leading Off this morning, plans have been hatched to build an $80 million maritime museum on the banks of the Trinity River. The big attraction would be the USS Dallas, the soon-to-be-decommissioned submarine used to film Hunt for Red October. Three things about this plan and its announcement have me scratching my head.

1. Can we tie in the museum with the canal that Dwaine Caraway wants to build on Main Street? Because if I could ride a nuclear attack sub from, say, City Tavern to Wild Salsa, that would be awesome. I’m in on that plan 110 percent.

2. The Morning News, you might be aware, was started by a fellow named George Bannerman Dealey. George had a nephew named Samuel David Dealey, who sits at fifth on the list of World War II submarine commanders, in terms of tonnage sunk. How do you write a story in the Morning News about a Dallas maritime museum featuring a submarine without mentioning Sam Dealey, aka “The Destroyer Killer“? (Hat tip to Richard Ross, the commenter who pointed this out on the News story.)

3. Finally, will city leaders please stop talking to us like children? Here’s what Phillip Jones, president and CEO of the Dallas CVB said about the museum: “Dallas is a city of big ideas, and this is just one more example.” Stop it! When someone proposes building a museum around a submarine in Dallas, don’t feed us that B.S. line about thinking big. Just say it. “This idea is insane. It’s nuts. But you know what? Dallas is crazy town. We’re gonna get Sean Connery up in here to cut the ribbon, and then he’s gonna pull a Crazy Ivan in the middle of Main Street. Just watch us.”