Earlier this week, I fielded a call from an upset subscriber named Susan. She had read our John Tesar story (the entirety of which is now online), and she was appalled by the number of f-bombs in the story. Not only where there three of them in the lead, but there was also a p-bomb (which was modified by one of the f-bombs).
Now, it’s our policy to print the f-word (and other such vulgarities) sparingly, usually only if it is in a direct quote and then only if no fewer than three offensive letters are dashed out. Like this: f – - – . Or: s – - – . (You’ll notice that WordPress doesn’t know how to handle the dashes.) There have been exceptions, and, interestingly, all those exceptions, without exception, appear to have been made in 1996. That year, in January, Eric Celeste wrote a story about gang culture that included the following line: “Members of the FSU (Fuck Shit Up) gang, for example, took to wearing Florida State University (FSU) attire.” Glenna Whitley must have thought it looked fun because the very next month, she wrote a story that contained this line: “When the officers ask the man for the car’s license plate number and other information to make a report of the robbery, he gets nasty, telling the cops to ‘get fucked.’” In September, Skip Bayless came along and wrote: “Even after the Cowboys had improved to 10-2, matching Kansas City for the NFL’s best record, Aikman stunned me by losing bis temper and his usual cool, charging that my sources were ‘a fucking joke.’” Our search engine is good but not perfect. Perhaps we’ve printed the un-dashed f-word elsewhere. That’s all I could find.
Then came this month’s issue and the passage that so offended subscriber Susan — who, by the way, was a delight to talk to on the phone. She explained that had a 14-year-old son, and he reads the magazine. Susan said she didn’t pretend that her son had never heard the word before. It was just that they didn’t talk that way in their house, and she didn’t expect to the see the word in D Magazine. I apologized to Susan for f-bombing her house. But I explained that we’d had a discussion here at D world headquarters as the story was going through the editing process. I felt the words needed to be printed. If we avoided them altogether, the opening scene to the Tesar story would have been impossible to write. If we dashed them, it would have created a typographic nightmare (e.g., an unintelligible, Morse-code-looking “You’re a f – - – ing p – - – - , Nick. F – - – you.”). The staff agreed with me. Even Krista — and she doesn’t use swear words herself.
That’s why we did what we did, I told Susan. And then I made her a promise: no f-bombs in the next issue.
I’d be interested to hear what you, dear FrontBurnervians, think of the call we made. If you share, also tell us whether you’re a subscriber. Because my sense is that most of you here are not subscribers, that you’re younger than our subscribers, and that you’ll think it’s silly that we even for a minute considered not printing the f-word.
32 comments
FU man. I effing love the F word. Keep up the fracking good work.
I am a subscriber. I am old to some people and young to others. I learned the f-word when I was three. I read the f-word when I was five. My house didn’t “use” the f-word either but that doesn’t mean it didn’t exist.
If someone says that word and you are quoting that person I would expect you to include the word. Otherwise it is no longer a factual quote.
I think you did the right thing. F—ing A right.
now what would Fr. Roch say?
Fuck no, I don’t fucking subscribe to your fucking magazine.
I don’t like it. While much of the “younger” generation is not offended by the use of the f-word, it seems inconsiderate to print it knowing that much of your subscriber base may be offended by its use. For readers that are offended by foul language, reading it detracts from the story, just as hearing it detracts from whatever the speaker is trying to convey.
Regarding the typographic nightmare, perhaps asterisks would work better than dashes.
What an act of craven cowardice. Is this Journalism or the Lawrence Welk show, man? A pleasant Mom tsk-tsks you for saying fuck, and you cave immediately? Look, nobody’s saying she should say fuck in her house — it’s her right as an American not to, but if you can’t say fuck in your own house, you’re probably not going to say it at the DMV, to a telemarketer, to a maitre d’, to other people’s dogs in the park, or to the characters on screen in a cinema, and I mean Christ, man, I’d just explode from the built-up pressure! I know one thing, they sure as fuck talked that way in my house when I was growing up, they let me say fuck in my own childhood home*, and I came out all right**.
I buy probably more than one-third but less than one-half of your issues*** from the newsstand. Not sure how if newsstand sales are less valuable somehow to your circ numbers.
_______________________________
* Actually, they allowed me to become a cranky, foul-mouthed little domestic tyrant. You know the type: Is this how you cook the fucking eggs?
** What’s so funny, Fuckface?
*** Mathematically, that can only work out to five issues per year. You’re welcome.
Fuck yes you should print that, unless you are a fucking pussy.
I recall emailing you once about not including the F word in a story (I think about the drought a few years back) and printing the dashed out word instead. I found the substitution patronizing.
You basically gave me the same answer as outlined above. I suppose I can accept either way, it is after all your magazine (or Wick’s anyway) and you can do as you please.
Unless you’re printing Highlights, Twilight, or something else specifically targeted at young minds being formed, I say let ‘er rip as appropriate.
I can’t imagine being offended by inclusion of the word, it’s part of life and I don’t go through life with blinders on expecting only sunshine and roses.
Wow, you can actually say pussy here. Such possibilities. Pussy! Pussy! Pussy! I feel like a foreign scrubwoman reduced to huffing ammonia to catch her daily buzz.
You should change the name of the blog to F—-Burner.
I love Mr. Buddons
Perhaps Wick (and others) might appreciate the William F. Buckley Jr. reference if you simply told any reader requesting that that you personally stop their subscription to “cancel your own fucking subscription”? Cheekiness aside, I support the use of vulgarity in quotes because a subject’s language helps readers understand the subject’s personality. That being said, as much as I admire chef Tesar’s reputation in the culinary arts he is the one who comes off as the “fucking pussy.” Then again, he’s eating all of this up with a big sloppy spoon.
@Daniel: You continue to be my favorite.
@Justin B: Kudos, sir.
Fuck this. My problem with the article is that after reading the first 5 or 6 paragraphs at least 3 times, I still can’t really make out who was the aggressor between Tesar and Badovinus, and I’m still not sure where this all happened. I recognize that I’m dumb as sh|+, but that’s just bad writing.
F*** yes, I’m a f***ing subscriber. I don’t mind if you use colorful language in your publication. It is important when quoting someone. It is less important if you are trying to convey an idea to a reader. There are always better words to use, most of the time. But sometimes, you gotta let it out. So keep it up, you f***ing f***sticks.
FU Karyn. Don’t read it then. I love the word. It says so much with its four letters!Just a bunch of pussies.
Susan sounds like an effin prude. I grew up in a house that didn’t use the F word, so what. If she doesn’t believe that her son doesn’t say F— when he’s with his friends then she is highly mistaken. And what’s she going to do about movies? Go pre-screen them before she decides if her son can go? C’mon, let the little F—er grow up.
Oh, Daniel. I miss you. You p-word.
For the last couple years, I have tried to scale back my use of the f-word. I realized I was sometimes saying it more than once in a sentence. It loses its importance. Now, I make sure to use it sparingly, and at the very most, only once in a sentence. D Magazine passes my test. I am indeed a subscriberfuck.
I f***ing love Daniel. And his pussy.
When I was in 6th grade I was kicked off the school bus for calling my bus driver, a seminarian at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, a mother fucker. I embraced the word then and I embrace the word now. If you don’t like it, then don’t fucking read it.
Curious, though. Is any word off limits? Would you print the “C word” (rhymes with “hunt”) if you were quoting someone?
We have teenagers. Swearing is very rarely heard in our house. I find it completely acceptible to use it in the Tesar story. I also appreciate the asterisks in the blog because it seems to discourage the use of such words. Using f-bombs can be funny and effective, but is a lazy way to express yourself.
Go Daniel. You are brilliant.
Ya know, Joel, sometimes you just have to say ‘what the fuck.’
I guess the lesson here is that if you don’t like the f-word, stay away from John tesar because that obviously mentally disturbed person says it all the time.
What about adding the word “eff” to the dictionary? Effing this. Effing that. You’re effed, etc.
@Buckeye: Not a bad idea but WHERE IS THE FUN IN THAT?
I admit to being in awe of this chain of commentary. It takes me back to my Marine Corps days. Wow. I mean, just, Wow.
not a subscriber but whats wrong with printing fuck in the magazine. Its everywhere, at ballgames, grocery stores, tv, the park wherever. Some may not like it but does that mean a magazine should act like the word doesnt exist. IF she doest like gays and they dont talk about gays in her house, should you then not print a story that talks about being gay?
if i can find that issue, i am totally gonna fuckin’ buy it.
There once was a lady named Sybil. Sybil actually had 16 distinct beavers. This is very important information because you can make lots of jokes out of it around the family dinner table. But I bet they won’t mention it at Susan’s house because they want their kids to be insular, and sheltered. Good luck with that one, Susan …
“Mom, did Sybil have 16 distinct beavers?”
“Where did you learn to talk like that?!”
“D Magazine. It’s this really neat magazine that all the kids are reading. I learn lots of things from it. Now fetch me a fucking Pepsi!”