Articles for September 1st, 2011

What’s on John Wiley Price’s Mind?

Here’s a little behind-the-scenes fun from our September issue that didn’t make it online until now. We were wondering what all must be going through John Wiley Price’s mind, what with the FBI and Brett Shipp getting all up in his business from every conceivable angle. So we thought we’d illustrate the commissioner’s brain. I drew the rough black-and-white sketch you see here, and then our art department sent that off to the great illustrator Steve Brodner (you’ve seen his work in the New Yorker, among other places) to make it look presentable. Hope you enjoy.

JWP2BIG PIC_SEP2

Al Jazeera Takes On Rick Perry

This lengthy piece from Al Jazeera English is essentially a roundup of Texan opinions on the Governor. Included in the discussion are the San Antonio Express News‘s Scott Stroud, Texas Monthly editor Jake Silverstein, the DMN‘s Wayne Slater, Ross Ramsey of the Texas Tribune, UT journalism professor Robert Jensen, and Texas Observer reporter Abby Rapaport. There’s also this choice quote from Perry, apparently taken from an interview he did with Fox News in June: “A prophet is generally not loved in their hometown.”

A Simple Proposal For Jerry Jones

Hey, gang. Zac Crain here. You may remember me from such time-wasting joke posts as the one about the thing, and all the other ones. We have some fun here, but today, I’m here to talk about something serious. That’s right: a massive, winner-take-all, basketball tournament featuring locked-out NBA players inside the Death Star or Jerry World or whatever we’re calling it now.

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Things To Do In Dallas Tonight: Sep. 1

Remember Ken Robinson, that guy out in Flower Mound who used a really obscure Texas law to take possession of a really nice house for $16? The Observer has lots more about Mr. Robinson today, and how he managed to snag his humble abode.

Backing away from suburbia, tonight marks the first TITAS performance of the season with Broadway veteran Brian Stokes Mitchell. Apparently, he was on The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air at some point, but that was one of the shows I managed to miss entirely as a kid. However, I saw him live more recently in the messy stage adaptation of Pedro Almodóvar’s Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown. Not that he needs my endorsement, what with his Tony award and all, but dude can sing. There are a few pairs of seats left on the orchestra level.

And since it’s unofficially officially the weekend, the Cedars Social has decided to officially stoke my dreams of a Parisian escape vacation by participating in a virtual state-wide French 75 contest. Nancy beat me to the punch on this one, and has info over on SideDish. Cedars is competing against Anvil Bar & Refuge in Houston, Esquire Tavern in San Antonio, Second Bar + Kitchen in Austin to see who can sell the most of the cocktail. This benefits you, the drinker, because the drink is discounted to five bucks. Compared to their usual $8 + price point, that’s a good deal. The contest starts at 3 PM, but goes all night. DJ JT Donaldson, who usually spins house music on Thursdays at PM Nightlife Lounge, will play French records from the 1960s until now (Pitbull is topping the charts these days over there, too, by the way). Here’s “Safari Disco Club” from Yelle to help get you in an appropriate mood and also plant the happy image of dancing elephants and tigers into your brain.

For more to do this evening, go here.

Stupid Traffic on LBJ and Woodall Rodgers Now Award-Winning

Not really award-winning, I guess, but I already typed that, and they DID make the top 5 of this list, sexily titled “100 Most Congested Road Segments in Texas.”

“WHAAAAAAT?” said no one.

Global Effects of Texas Drought

A 50 percent increase in the price of bread, among others. Maybe somebody other than Rick Perry should have prayed for rain back in April? I’m not saying God doesn’t pay him much heed, but after four months I’m beginning to wonder if he’s as close to the Almighty as he claims to be.

Leading Off (9/1/11)

Cat Gets Plaque for Retirement. Princess, the police cat who kept the mice out, retired yesterday. She was given a plaque and will live out the rest of her days in a private home. Now she has the hardest decision of her 17 years: just where will she hang that plaque?

700 New Laws Take Effect Today. As of today, you can now legally drive your helicopter at 75 miles per hour at night while shooting at feral hogs who are noodling. And you can/can’t do about 696 other things, too.

Mayor Puts Paperclips Vs. Staples on Agenda. Two of Wilmer’s city council members filed a suit against Mayor Jeff Steele for not putting important items on the agenda. So Steele put on some important items, including what types of pens should be used on library cards and whether the city should use paperclips or staples. While this can be a heated discussion, I believe Crystol Bridwell, city secretary, has the answer figured out: she doesn’t discriminate. She even uses both highlighters and Sharpies.