Articles for May 13th, 2011
Where the Mayoral Watching Parties Will Be Watched
Just in case you’ve misforgotten, we’re electing a new mayor tomorrow (much to Dwaine Caraway’s chagrin). Here is where the candidates will be watching the results tomorrow night and, based on that, who I think will win the election:
David “Good to Great” Kunkle: San Francisco Rose
Assessment: Solid choice. Kunkle has positioned himself (back when he was still actively campaigning) as the man of the people. The Rose, one of Dallas’ original fern bars, is in Kunkle’s M-Streets hood. It’s a beloved institution, even if the food is mediocre and overpriced. Think of it this way: if Zac Crain were to run for mayor, he’d have his election night party at the Old Monk. The Rose is Kunkle’s Monk.
Ron “8-Track” Natinsky: The Loft at Gilley’s
Assessment: Carol Reed does all her election night gigs here. It’ll be the first time Natinsky has darkened the door of Gilley’s. He’ll feel out of place and ill at ease. I can’t support this option.
Mike “Mike” Rawlings: Trece
Assessment: Here’s a guy who knows how to play to his base. Trece? It’s deliciously elitist. Why didn’t he just have the thing at Al Biernat’s? I like Rawlings’ moxie. He’ll be hard to beat.
Edward “The Nigerian Hammer” Okpa: [staffer who answered phone at campaign HQ said she didn't know the location]
Assessment: I spoke too soon. This is way better than Rawlings’ choice. Of course the person who answers the phone at your campaign HQ knows where the party is. But why would she tell me? She deduced from the way I introduced myself — “Hi, this is Tim Rogers, editor of D Magazine” — that I’m a dork who would totally be a buzz kill at an election night party. So she copped ignorance. VERY solid move.
Judging from the foregoing, Okpa will win the election tomorrow in a landslide. Congratulations, sir. Well played.
ABC Adds Good Christian . . . Belles to its Fall Lineup
It was just announced that the pilot based on Kim Gatlin’s book, Good Christian Britches, has been picked up and will be part of the ABC fall lineup with a slight change — the name. The program will be called Good Christian Belles.
Doesn’t quite have the same ring to it, huh?
Quick Summer Contest: Standing by to Judge You and Your Swimsuit Body
Sex sells + editors need to take summer vacations = Why not a swimsuit contest?
Twenty finalists – 10 male and 10 female – will be selected, based on the “most appealing” photos of people in swimsuits.
Finalists will be placed online for voting. The contestants with the most votes – one male and one female – will be featured on the cover of a major Dallas-area publication.
Pickens: Koch Brothers Behind Attacks on Energy Plan
Billionaire T. Boone Pickens says political conservatives and tea-party types should embrace his Pickens Plan for natural-gas use, not attack it because of its tax credits for natural gas.
Citing published reports, the Dallas energy magnate said the wealthy Koch Brothers of Koch Industries are behind the attacks. The Kochs, he said, have holdings in ethanol and oil and are merely looking to protect their interests. “They don’t want natural-gas prices to rise,” he said.
In comments made today, just before he attended a Dallas luncheon for Phoenix Houses of Texas, Pickens (pictured in photo by Jeanne Prejean) scoffed at charges that he’s pushing the Plan, now before Congress as the NAT GAS Act, because it would benefit him personally. “I’ve spent $82 million to give America an energy plan it’s never had,” he said. He added that continuing to buy OPEC oil subsidizes terrorists, and that he’s asked for any natural-gas tax breaks to “sunset” in five years. “You need a lift to get it started,” he said.
Best of Big D Readers’ Choice: Services Poll Begins Monday, May 16
Here we are: down to the final round of this year’s Best of Big D Readers’ Choice voting. And the questions we’re laying before the voters, starting Monday, are more important than ever before.
What’s the best day spa in Dallas? The best place to get your eyelashes done? Your eyebrows done? Best place for a facial? Best fitness program? Best massage? Best manicure and pedicure? Best waxing? Best yoga studio? Best sunless tanning salon? Hair salon?
Best auto mechanic? Tailor? Dry cleaner? Best place to board and groom your pets? Best shoe repair? Best car wash? Framer? Mover? Â Best stationer? Best yard care? Best veterinary clinic? Â Painter? Caterer?
Best kids’ party entertainer? Best family attraction? Best art classes for kids? Best family photographers?
Hold on, hold on. Don’t shout your answers at the computer screen. We can’t hear you yet. Just return on Monday and cast your ballot. You’ll be able to vote up to once an hour through May 29.
The winners will be announced in the August 2011 issue of D Magazine.
Caraway: Review All Park Department Procedures
In the wake of the “Happy Trails” safety-program controversy, Dallas Mayor
Dwaine Caraway says he’d like to see a complete review of processes and procedures at the city Park Department. “It’s not about the politics,” Caraway said last night, asked about the flap over the $84,000-plus “Trails” contract that was spread among several firms, including one owned by friends of mayoral candidate Mike Rawlings. “It’s about the processes in the Park Department.”
Caraway (pictured in photo by Jeanne Prejean) said that if the “Trails” work had been done pro bono, there’s a chance the $84,000 could have been allocated to other areas of need, such as for keeping more of the city’s swimming pools open, for example. His comments came on the same day that WFAA-TV reported that Stan Richards, founder of the Richards Group, said his firm would have considered designing the “Trails” program for free, had it been approached about the work. Said Caraway of the way the “Trails” contract was awarded: “There might be a lot of stuff like that” at the Park Department.
Things To Do in Dallas This Weekend: May 13-15
The weekend already? Say it ain’t so. This morning brings the terrible news that pretty much everyone hates Hesher, which makes me kind of sad, because Joseph Gordon-Levitt seems adorably adorable even when he’s playing an unwashed miscreant. Maybe I’ll just watch 10 Things I Hate About You for the millionth time, instead.
Friday
It’s no secret that I’m a musical theater lover. Which of course makes the Uptown Player’s annual fundraiser, Broadway Our Way at the Kalita Humphreys Theater, pretty much a must-see. It’s a gender-bending musical medley (women singing the parts meant for males, and vice versa) of favorite numbers from well known shows like Wicked and Hairspray, plus a Michael Jackson mash up and songs from Priscilla, Queen of the Desert, a new musical that opened in New York just last September. I especially enjoy the fact that this is an easy, cheap, and fun way to support a local community theater, instead of a prohibitively expensive gala dinner. When a cast of 26 talented people donate their time for three weeks, it’s worth an evening of mine. Tickets are still available for tonight’s performance, and it runs through Sunday afternoon.
Texas’ Hottest Women Sex Offenders List: Worst Idea in the History of Ideas?
So yesterday the Houston Press, sister publication of the Dallas Observer, decided to post an item called “The 10 Hottest Women on the Texas Sex Offenders List.” Which is pretty much what it sounds like.
Yes, they’ve already issued an apology. Â And yes, we’ve now linked to them, which may have given them exactly what they wanted in the first place.
Mother Nature Blessed Katy Trail 5K
Part of the crowd headed to the after-party.
As I watched the incredibly dark, ominous clouds roll in Wednesday, I thought there was no way they’d clear up in time for the Katy Trail 5K. (I know what you’re thinking. The race was on Thursday, not Wednesday. Regardless, I was concerned). No need to worry. The weather for my favorite annual 5K was absolutely perfect. And all 5,000 participants seemed to be thinking the same thing. A few highlights of the after-party run after the jump.
FightNight Insiders Put Kunkle on Top
Mike Rawlings
Boxers like Felipe Castenada and Calvin Shepherd duked it out last night at the annual FightNight fund-raiser, two days before the Dallas mayoral election. But after this week’s news stories, which had candidates Ron Natinsky and Mike Rawlings trading jabs and body blows, you were sort of hoping the mayoral hopefuls would show up and climb into the ring, too, and settle this thing once and for all. Alas, only two of them–Rawlings and Edward Okpa–were among the 1,000-plus attending the black-tie bash at the Hilton Anatole.
Okpa, decked out in a sharp, Little Anthony and the Imperials-looking suit, said (with a straight face) that, come Saturday, he expects to be in a runoff. Rawlings, for his part, declined to speculate about the outcome. “When I play a game, I play hard and don’t make predictions,” he said. “I let the scorecard take care of itself.” Meanwhile, political insiders attending the fund-raiser said that according to the latest internal polling it’s a very close race, with just four percentage points separating the top three contenders. David Kunkle is in the lead, the buzz had it, with Rawlings in second place and Ron Natinsky third.
Leading Off (5/13/11)
Ron Springs, Nov. 4, 1956 — May 12, 2011. Former Dallas Cowboy running back Ron Springs died Thursday, never regaining consciousness after falling into a coma nearly four years ago. Springs went into a coma in 2007 after complications from a surgery to remove a cyst from his arm. It was the same year that former teammate Everson Walls donated a kidney to Springs.
Boom Goes the … Applesauce? Bruce Ankenbrand hardly fits the stereotype of a terrorist. For one thing, he’s 7 months old. Nonetheless, his antics were indeed uncovered by the TSA screeners at DFW International, who allegedly found traces of explosives on the jars of his fancy-schmancy organic baby food he and his parents were trying to bring in to allegedly feed him. Word has it the real bomb was to occur two or three hours after ingestion, but could easily be contained within a size 4 Pampers.
Here We Go Again, Southwest. Oh, Southwest. I know you keep getting positive rankings for your customer service, and for good reason. But when you apparently screw up, you do it so gloriously, and with the same subject. I admire your consistency.
No Cutsies – Especially at In-N-Out. So Dallas Observer food writer Jenny Block went to Frisco to snag some In-N-Out, and waited for a very long time (for a burger) with a lot of other people to get in, because the line (for a burger) was really long (for a burger) apparently and the wait for your burger was also very long after you ordered. So everyone apparently didn’t cotton to four guys who tried several times (and ultimately succeeded) to cut in line (for a burger) instead of wait several hours (for a burger). I still do not understand why you’d wait this long and do all this work, for a burger. Is a Double Double made with unicorn meat and buns concocted from grain hand-polished by mermaids before being ground into flour by a stone pulled by a centaur and mixed with tears from that 197os littering commercial Indian chief? Because if so, I’ll take it. If not, I’ll wait a few more weeks and go through the freaking drive through like a normal person eating a hamburger.
Let’s Play a Game. Where am I? And was I aware that I would be flying back to Dallas on Friday the 13th? Am I scared?
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