When I moved here four years ago, I learned how much Coloradans disdain Texans. Now, in this column, I find that Oklahomans hate Texans as well. Does anyone like Texans (other than other Texans)? And what the heck did one (or several) of you do to provoke all this hostility?
143 comments
It’s just envy.
The displaced Yankees from the Great Lakes area love Texas. Because they love them some employment.
I went to school with a lot of Texas (in Mississippi) and experienced similar feelings of ill will.
My then hatred stemmed from the feeling I got that these transplanted Texans (read: Denied @ UTexas) were somehow enriching my life by coming to Mississippi.
I’ve never met anyone more proud (egotistical) about being from a state, not a city, just a state, than Texans. There’s a sense that somehow America would cease to exist if not for Texas.
After living there for a year, I can see how Texans are proud of their state. It’s a great place to live and hail from when speaking of hometowns. Still, the ****iness that can arise that tends to wear on people.
It also could be this week’s BCS rankings…
I think it has something to do with being home to the worst president in the history of the United States.
I could be wrong. I doubt it, but I could be.
It’s not ****iness. It’s a geniune love and appreciation for our home state. And it’s the fact that no matter where a Texan is in the world, whether it be in a palace in France, a penthouse in New York City or an island resort in the Pacific, he/she still is proud of the fact that he/she was born in Texas. We may live in other parts of the world, but we have no desire to be considered natives of those areas. Texans in Minnesota don’s want to be from Minnesota. Same goes for Mississippi, California, New York, Oklahoma, Illinois, Colorado, etc. We have no desire to be from your state. Period.
Being born in Texas brings us legitimate happiness we wouldn’t trade for anything, so that of course pisses people off. There’s nothing people hate more than other people who are happy.
They are upset, because the shape of Texas makes a better tattoo than getting Colorado inked on your arm. A rectangle, really?
Oh, the “Tulsa World…” ranks right up there with a reputable newspaper. They should stick to what they know best: discount cigarettes and indian casinos.
Thank god for the Red River as a natural boundary…
Jealous Okies…everyone knows that the reason that Texas doesn’t fall into the Gulf of Mexico is that Oklahoma $uck$!
Come to think of it, I’ve never seen a “I wasn’t born in New Jersey but I got here as fast as I could” bumperstickers.
I lived in New york and worked in Brooklyn in the Orthodox Jewish community, they loved Texas and they had so many questions about it, it was so much fun to work there! Everyone always loved my accent in the city too!Not everyone hates Texas!
Ignorance is bliss, apparently.
I’ve rarely met a native Texan who has ever traveled outside the TX borders, so I’m not sure what they have to compare their home state with.
Could it be the ‘F*** You, We’re from Texas!’ t-shirt I wear whenever I go overseas? Or is it the fact that everyone is just jealous of a state that can legally secede from the union, has plentiful natural wealth, has decent speed limits, more firearms, and plenty of cool people that come from here?
(Thank you Loco Gringos!)
Everyone else has bad Mexican food.
@julie. The reason most Coloradoans hate us is because we DON’T stay home. They are overrun with Texans in the summer. At least we love our home state enough to go back home. Don’t seem to hate the money we bring with us, though.
Thanks Jared,
Other feats of Texas bada$$ery:
-We invented the frozen margarita
-We sent a carpet-bagging governor to DC to get rid of him.
-We killed Kennedy and got away with it.
-We sent LBJ to DC to send tons of defense industry cash to the state.
-Big Oil.
-We beat Mexico in 1836. (before World Cup soccer was used to settle international disputes)
-Mary Kay Ash made ugly women do-able.
-Austin City Limits / SXSW
-low taxes, cheap land and labor
-Tommy Lee Jones
-Texas grows and hordes gorgeous women better than anyone else!
-Chuck Norris aka Walker, Texas Ranger aka The Texas State Department of Defense
Boo Yah!
Whenever I travel internationally I find that if I tell people I’m an American I get resentment, but if I tell them I’m from Dallas they want to talk all about what they think they know of Dallas AND our great state of Texas. I am a Native Texan (and yes, the cap N is legitimate) and couldn’t be prouder. Contrary to @Julie’s ignorant comment, I have traveled all over the world on both business and pleasure and have had the good fortune to live in about 10 other states. I enjoy sampling the cultures and cuisines of other places, but there is NO place I’d rather live than Texas. Not only do we have the bumper stickers, t-shirts and gimme caps extolling the virtues of our great state, but Texas is also immortalized in countless songs. How many songs have been written about your home state, @Julie?
Do they hate Adrian Peterson? Tommie Harris? Billy Sims? Brian Bosworth?
Colorado hates, I think, because part of it was Texas, a bit ago. New Mexico seems to have gotten over it, and I think Oklahoma panhandle just forgot. anyhow… people from somewhere always find a way to hate people from somewhere else. that seems to be human.
I have to second Grant’s response – I went to school in Tennessee and never in my life have hated a state as much as Texas after 4 years there. There is a now infamous picture of me flipping off a Texas flag hanging in someone’s dorm room. Who could have known I’d be sucked in by the state’s gravitational pull all these years later. We even had a separate “Texas” picture in my sorority on picture day. Give you one guess as to what that picture looked like every.single.year.
@El Rey, in deference to your statement that we killed Kennedy and got away with it..in 1979 I was in Naples, Italy when an elderly Italian gentleman asked where I was from…when I told him I was from Dallas, he excitedly replied, YOU killed Kennedy! And I said, yep, and I got away with it, too. He didn’t quite know what to make of my comment. But then he proceeded to ask me if I had oil wells and cattle. Seems the TV show DALLAS was a big hit in Italy. He ended up inviting me to his home for dinner and to meet his family. He didn’t introduce me as an American though…he said, this is my friend from Dallas.
Colorado-ans hate Texans because Texans buy Colorado land and build ranches and then they come visit and act like they own the place (go figure). At least that’s what I learned when I lived in Denver. Family Guy writers hate Texas(ans) too. Anybody notice?
an addendum – I was in Munich in September and they don’t just hate Texans, they hate Americans. all of us. so you got that going for you, Texas. also, they enjoyed firing imaginary six shooters into the air whenever they found out I lived in Texas. “pow pow! you carry gun? you have cows? you are cowgirl, yes?” awesome. but I found by the end of my trip that the hate was more for our President than us citizens. they freaking LOVE Obama.
i think it’s common to hate any successful entity with a large and vocal fan base…i had roommates from San Antonio and Kansas City and I will forever hate the Spurs and Jayhawk basketball…I could also do without seeing a red sox hat for the next 30 years.
With low taxes, beautiful women, and over 20% of the Fortune 500 it is tough to be loved by the lacking masses.
The best thing that ever came out of Texas was I-35. GO POKES!
jamesn,
LBJ has been gone for almost 40 years but the damage done still lingers. You may be onto something.
We could start with…….
Accomplishments As President
Attacked and took over two countries.
Spent the surplus and bankrupted the treasury.
Shattered record for biggest annual deficit in history.
Set economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period.
Set all-time record for biggest drop in the history of the stock market.
First president in decades to execute a federal prisoner.
First president in U.S. history to enter office with a criminal record.
First year in office set the all-time record for most days on vacation by any president in U.S. history.
After taking the entire month of August off for vacation, presided over the worst security failure in U.S. history.
Set the record for most campaign fundraising trips than any other president in U.S. history.
In my first two years in office over 2 million Americans lost their job.
Cut unemployment benefits for more out of work Americans than any president in U.S. history.
Set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period.
Appointed more convicted criminals to administration positions than any president in U.S. history.
Set the record for the least amount of press conferences than any president since the advent of television.
Signed more laws and executive orders amending the Constitution than any president in U.S. history.
Presided over the biggest energy crises in U.S. history and refused to intervene when corruption was revealed.
Presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S. history and refused to use the national reserves as past presidents have.
Cut healthcare benefits for war veterans.
Set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously take to the streets to protest me (15 million people), shattering the record for protest against any person in the history of mankind.
Dissolved more international treaties than any president in U.S. history.
My presidency is the most secretive and unaccountable of any in U.S. history.
Members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in U.S. history (the ‘poorest’ multimillionaire, Condoleezza Rice, has an Exxon oil tanker named after her).
First president in U.S. history to have all 50 states of the Union simultaneously go bankrupt.
Presided over the biggest corporate stock market fraud of any market in any country in the history of the world.
First president in U.S. history to order a U.S. attack and military occupation of a sovereign nation.
Created the largest government department bureaucracy in the history of the United States.
Set the all-time record for biggest annual budget spending increases, more than any president in U.S. history.
First president in U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the human rights commission.
First president in U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the elections monitoring board.
Removed more checks and balances, and have the least amount of congressional oversight than any presidential administration in U.S. history.
Rendered the entire United Nations irrelevant.
Withdrew from the World Court of Law.
Refused to allow inspectors access to U.S. prisoners of war and by default no longer abide by the Geneva Conventions.
First president in U.S. history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. elections).
All-time U.S. (and world) record holder for most corporate campaign donations.
My biggest lifetime campaign contributor presided over one of the largest corporate bankruptcy frauds in world history (Kenneth Lay, former CEO of Enron Corporation).
Spent more money on polls and focus groups than any president in U.S. history.
First president in U.S. history to unilaterally attack a sovereign nation against the will of the United Nations and the world community.
First president to run and hide when the U.S. came under attack (and then lied saying the enemy had the code to Air Force 1)
First U.S. president to establish a secret shadow government.
Took the biggest world sympathy for the U.S. after 9/11, and in less than a year made the U.S. the most resented country in the world (possibly the biggest diplomatic failure in U.S. and world history).
With a policy of ‘disengagement’ created the most hostile Israeli-Palestine relations in at least 30 years.
Fist U.S. president in history to have a majority of the people of Europe (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and stability.
First U.S. president in history to have the people of South Korea more threatened by the U.S. than their immediate neighbor, North Korea.
Changed US policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts.
Set all-time record for number of administration appointees who violated U.S. law by not selling huge investments in corporations bidding for government contracts.
Failed to fulfill my pledge to get Osama Bin Laden ‘dead or alive.’
Failed to capture the anthrax killer who tried to murder the leaders of our country at the United States Capital building. After 18 months I have no leads and zero suspects.
In the 18 months following the 9/11 attacks I have successfully prevented any public investigation into the biggest security failure in the history of the United States.
Removed more freedoms and civil liberties for Americans than any other president in U.S. history.
In a little over two years created the most divided country in decades, possibly the most divided the U.S. has ever been since the Civil War.
Entered office with the strongest economy in U.S. history and in less than two years turned every single economic category heading straight down….
And the path of destruction will continue in the Bluffview area in 2009.
On the upside, we are no longer thought of as the state the killed Kennedy.
“First U.S. president to establish a secret shadow government.”
What about a secret government in broad daylight? Or, conversely, a shadow government open to the public M-F, 8-5? Better or worse?
Good luck with that radio station. I hear Air America did fabulously.
You should ski in Utah. They hate Californians. They are relatively indifferent to Texans.
I grew up in Colorado and I learned to hate
Texans, but it was nothing more than an irrational dislike of the invading hoards. Also they drive too fast in the snow.
I think they hate us because: A) we are superior to them in all ways and I say that humbly, or B) because of Jack Jett.
@queuno:
I represent that remark.
@JEJ: Yeah yeah we know. But the massive missive on Bush’s legacy is much more recent. The Texas bashing — particularly by OK & CO — has been around far far longer.
I’m one of those who ‘got here as fast as I could’ & have now been here long enough (35yrs) to be nearly native. Born an Okie & when my family moved to Dallas (I was but a wee one), my friends told me we’d be living on ranches and ride horses to school and that all of Texas looked like the bleakest parts of West Texas. Well, got here & found not so much. But the Texas bashing I’ve heard from Okies my whole life seemed more in fun and largely based on sports rivalries.
I’ve travelled far and wide and have experienced much of what others here have described: most places like Texans and Dallasites just fine — despite certain stereotypes. I’ve encountered some of the dissing from Coloradoans, but seems that it stems from what Barbara was saying about Texans using Colo as their playground in summer and winter. & she’s right: they don’t seem to object too much to the money we bring.
Besides CO & OK, the only other state I’ve visited that seemed to have a problem with Texas was California (and that may only be parts of, and maybe only because that was at the time California was experiencing lots of power problems and the company(s) were from here.)
Texas rocks.
I think it’s because all our sports teams are so domin…
Nevermind.
Excuse me but Mr. Bush was not born in Texas and ‘was educated’ in Yankeeland.
CDD Were you at Oktoberfest? ‘Cause when I go I always make friends..weren’t you raised to be friendly? That is our hallmark.
Around here Doc Harrell (founder of Lakewood and drugstore/soda shop proprietor of 50 years) in’doc’trinated us well – his oft-repeated words:
“Never forget that you are the best.
from the best neighborhood,
in the best city,
in the best state,
in the best country on earth”.
amanda
that’s sweet. now are you the same “real amanda” that sends me emails? the one that does some sort of gig there at d magazine?
the one that preaches about personal attacks and for commenters to stay on topic?
the one that is the love of my cyber life?
why are you throwing around the “hate”?
LT
Thanks for responding is a positive and valid point. I don’t follow sports, so it is hard for me to fathom that someone would dislike a state based on how well a sports team does.
So if the question, as I read it now, is just about Oklahoma, then I withdraw my well thought out cut and paste.
So to answer the original post, I don’t know why people in Oklahoma dislike (hate) Texans. It could very well be due to me and my lack of football skills. Maybe Amanda (the real one) is Amanda (the right one).
Edward Abbey explains”:
Betcha he dated ugly hairy women and called grilled chicken “barbecue.”
It’s because y’all throw trash on the hiway like ducks take a crap
I have to admit, ever since bush was elected and the decline began, whenever someone asked me where i was from, i might have meekly mumbled Texas under my breath.
However, recently while on vacation in Kauai, someone confused me as being from New Jersey, and i spoke up vehemently denying that.
So there are a few states I can think of out there that people might hate more. (i’m looking at you Rhode Island, and you know why)
Same reason people from other Texas schools hate UT fans
And no-one yields the passing lane.
Not even when out of state.
I believe that a sense of humor is a terrible thing not to have. Self-deprecation keeps one humble, and from getting overly-dramatic.
Texans love their home. A lot of people in the U.S. just don’t. I lived in NY for a while, and all the Amys and Brians from Ohio were embarassed to admit it. They pretended to be New Yorkers and made the city a very aggressive place to live. It was pitiful. Why anyone would waste energy hating another state is beyond me. But you know what? Lots of people who complain about Texas have made cushy little lives for themselves here. They don’t have the guts to leave.
@LakeWWWooder: I was at Oktoberfest, and I was friendly! I only encountered a few people who really truly didn’t care for Americans. Beer unites the world in beery loving happiness 99% of the time. Prost!
When I lived in Durango, CO in the ’80’s, people hated Texans because all people who move to resorts/ski areas, no matter where from, are required to hate the skier/tourists from the most represented state. In CO, that would be TX.
They adopt this attitude within 35 minutes of signing a lease. It keeps them mainstream and painfully hip.
In VT, everyone hated Massholes, with Quebecers a close second. Can’t say as I blame them for that, though.
Texan, Thats very true. I have chosen to make my living here. At the same time though, I love my home state of Oklahoma more than I will ever even like Texas. It’s the arrogance I think that rubs people the wrong way. Not sure “the friendly state” is accurate.
JEJ- I prefer “writer of the year,” but tomato, tomahto, whatever. Don’t be so sensitive, I’ve slept less than 4 hours after leaving West Hollywood last night…
Simple.
Some things truly ARE bigger in Texas.
I’ll leave the rest to those of you with vivid imaginations.
I like the barbecue, the various Mexican cuisines including our signature Tex-Mex, the rich ongoing musical tradition, and the way it’s shaped. I like the women, sure, but they look pretty good to me everywhere I’ve ever been. (If you go for overprimped Barbie types, I guess we do have the biggest surfeit this side of SoCal.) I like the economy, which I confess to taking for granted. I like the heat — I don’t care what you say, I like it.
There’s some nice scenery, but face it, not nearly enough: Texas really is mostly ugly. And I don’t really like the accent, even though I have a little bit of one myself, especially when I say God damn or the state name itself*.
In short, it’s a mixed bag like anywhere, but if people put beans in chili you can’t really call it “people,” can you? Cotton-headed fools is what we call them in Texas.
_________________________
*(Ngahnamn; Deggsus.)
amanda
i don’t think you would be allowed to walk near the city limits of weho honey. orange county maybe, but weho…no freaking way.
Ditto Daniel. (While dodging a tomato)
What arrogance? We like our state. We’re happy here. I think _everyone_ should feel as strongly about their home state as Texans feel about Texas. If you’re from Oklahoma, love it. Oklahoma is a great place. If you’re from Ohio, embrace it. Stop acting like you’re too urban and sophisticated for your home.
No need to dodge. This is the Friendly State.(TM) Also the Lone Star State — so we’re ruggedly independent. But friendly! Oh, and don’t mess with us. So we’re ruggedly independent, friendly types you shouldn’t mess with.
At all events, I’m fresh out of tomatoes.
*cough* stereotype much?
I consider it my life’s work to reconcile conflicting stereotytpes. For instance, did you know most undocumented Latin American immigrants are professional thieves and drug dealers who, simultaneously and somewhat bafflingly, screw honest Americans out of low-paying, degrading jobs?
It’s a Stereotypical Fact!(TM)
What about the one about who is allowed to carouse in West Hollywood?
I’d like to see how well the football teams at OU and OSU would do without any Texans on the Roster.
texan is right, heck I was born in Houston, lived early life in Oklahoma and grew up in Dallas. I lived a couple of times in France. schooled in Austin, spent a nice xmas in Munich and spent some time in NYC and Santa Monica. I find all of them great and all have faults. Thats what makes it fun to be alive and have a “home”.
To assert that Amanda-the-real-one would or should be persona non grata in a gayborhood (if I’m getting Jack’s meaning right) is a non sequiter. And with that I’ve used up my daily ration of Latin phrases.
You’re the bestest, Daniel.
Well, Daniel and Jack…my friends might disagree. They like it when I am there when their t-cell count inexplicably drops, doing laundry/cooking, gluing lashes on a 6 foot 5 inch Reba so domestic partners can go on stage without missing a beat, picking up medicinal herbs (cough) and acting as a mule to transport via and Armenia gypsy cab from WH to Cedars (I pride myself on being able to manuever a guerney onto the smoking patio with stealth while the triple ****tail IV stays in tact.) Stereotypes aside, I’d have to say that we Texans are hated because we are so darn unpredictable.
Bethany, Daniel
Look back at the post. Why is it that when I defend myself, I am taking things to serious. Yet, when I apply the very same sense of humor, then the attack comes on.
It is a case of not being able to win for loosing.
Amanda asserts that the reason people might hate texas is because of me. I suggest that might be off topic. She/Behtany tell me to lighten up.
Daniel. I always admire your postings even though your view of me is always made clear. I am in a no win situation with these gals. If one of them would have said you are the reason people hate Texas. Please tell me what is the right way to handle it.
Why is it they will not let me express my view/opinion without coming in with an attack. Then call it humor except when humor is returned. It is sooooooo FUGGING republican.
My question to you Daniel. Why don’t your disect the vebiage of the chicks that you are so quick to jump to the defense? Tell me what I have done to any of you to deserve the sh1t you always throw at me.
and one more thing… Although I am a longhorn, some of the best people I ever met are aggies. And I know some dang nice people from Colorado too.and who cant love anybody from Jersey… I mean The Boss!. How cool are people from Canada and Mexico! okay the french can be a pain ( Im 2nd generation). but they are great fans of texicans. Lets just send love to our Colorado friends and everybody else.
And BTW, I don’t shy away from sh1t anymore than George W. Bush does. So I can take your venom, but it is a bit confusing when it lacks any amount of merit whatsoever.
Jack, your list is impressive, but somewhat outdated on the anthrax item. After hounding Steven Hatfield everywhere but in a courtroom since 2002, the feds finally closed in who may have/probably done it, a guy named Ivins, who committed suicide recently. They had been investigating Ivins for years, even while they were publicly villifying Hatfield (and then paying him $5mil for having ruined his career and his life.)
I can’t help it.
Jack, we tease you because we like you. Think junior high.
Amanda
Then my hats off to you for that. I admire and respect you for the work that you do for your friends. I just don’t understand why i is so freaking necessary to ride my azz over every opinion that I have. Do you think I am evil and wrong 100 percent of the time?
Did I offend you by saying something negative about George Freaking Bush?
Tell me how you decide what is in good humor and fun. Really…because every single fugging time, I make a comment, no matter what the fug it is about, you and Bethney come in with this litney of comments/corrections/snipes/attacks that have ZERO to do with the topic.
What is is about honey? Really?
Amanda, I said it was a non sequiter — nonsense, neither here nor there, a non-starter, if you will. I would be unsurprised to learn you had a cadre of gay friends, unsurprised to learn you had none. I would guess, if pressed, that you probably had a bestest friend who was gay in college or your 20s. It’s hardly a secret that gay men love sassy women.
The scene you paint also qualifies as non sequiter, though it’s certainly lurid enough, particularly since it involves Armenians. Why does everybody hate Armenians?
amanda
if you tease me because you like me…then why in the hell can’t you and bethany take the tease back without bringing in the daniel/ground the jett/crush the jett/bash the jett/ army?
Uh, not my army. If I can’t manage on my own wits, then I deserve to be verbally clubbed like a baby seal.
If they choose to defend me, it’s because there’s a possibility someone’s misread snark, is missing the snark chip altogether, or some goulash of misunderstanding.
Bethany, you sure do have a lot of these “snark” misunderstandings Bethany. Can we get back on topic?
Before you kids’ squabbling results in somebody pulling this blog over, Texans are also resented for bragging about:
-Bugs Bunny, Porky Pig, Daffy Duck (their creator was Texan Frederick Bean “Tex” Avery)
-Corn Dogs (Dallas, Texas)
-Condensed Milk (invented by Texas “Old 300″ pioneer Gail Borden, although manufactured originally in New York)
-Dr. Pepper (Waco, Texas)
-Hamburger (Athens, Texas)
-Microchip (Dallas, Texas)
-Psychedelic Music (Austin, Texas) (1966 – album title “The Psychedelic Sounds of the 13th Floor Elevators”)
-Push-up bras (invented by quintessential Texan Howard Hughes for Betty Grable in “The Outlaw)
-TexMex cuisine
Well thank you For the Record for sticking to the topic. I wish it were my list. I certainly could add a few things too it and would agree that it is very outdated.
While George W. Bush is about as well liked around the world as I am on this blog, it baffles me that people love to shoot the messenger and totally ignore the message.
As to you the Jett haters, why don’t you just email me at info@jackejett.com and list the reasons you hate me, or why I should not be part of this blog, or why every comment I make rubs you the wrong way. While I am very open to apologizing for mistakes, it seems odd to attack for the sake of attacking, unless of course, judging others makes you feel better about yourself.
-also barbed wire, best pronounced “bob war”
-having two time zones (no, El Paso, it wasn’t intentional, but it does work out well for the rest of us)
-Coloradans are understandably peeved about naming one of our prettiest rivers after their river
-the longest unbroken beach in North America
-the only state with as many as five of the six types of terrain in the world (everything but tundra, thank goodness), and then for correctly but haughtily pointing out that California’s redwood forests are actually canopy forests, one of the six types
-counties bigger than whole states
-ranches bigger than whole states
-rush hour traffic jams bigger than whole states
-we also invented Astroturf
Jack,
I’m just trying to keep things light, me. I’ve been the brunt of jerkery around here, and I’ve also been the jerk. It’s all in a day’s should-be-working. It’s a case of too many smartasses in the kitchen. The way to “handle” it is to ignore it or make a joke, though again, I’ve not always been the Buddha Carlin I aspire to be.
At the same time, there’s something bracing about giving and receiving hostility that people seem oddly to require; witness the behavior of Dallas drivers.
Which is one thing I don’t like about Texas. (I ain’t no Writer of the Year, but I deserve a beer for that one, come on.)
I love you Daniel & Jack. And I love Oklahoma.
I like Texas.
Don’t pay attention to this Anderson chick. She is just a regurgitator. That is all she knows. Amanda is her Dick Cheney. They work in tandem like Kate and Kay. Too full of themselves to see past it all. Sad, pathetic and total bark barks. The world knows George W. Bush is an idiot. You would have to be Helen Keller to think otherwise and these little girls are Keller to the bone man, to the bone.
i like you all…
Moon river, wide as a mile…
Why does Bethany stir up crap on this blog everyday? Does she ever contribute or just start these crap fights? If you don’t like something someone says, then get to the point. I always thought that Amanda and Bethany were one and the same. They bounce off each other and seem to have a problem with, well with everyone. They should start a blog called Two Runts from Texas then they could gripe till the Rows come home.
I agree. Don’t pay attention to this Anderson chick. She’s even regurgitating right now.
I do think it’s adorable, however, that people assume I love Dub-ya. They’ve clearly not been in the voting booth with me, or read my blog much.
But don’t look at it now. Blogger is flogging me.
While standing at the back of the Full Moon Party crowd on St. Maarten, minding my own business, a devilish little Frenchie made a point of seeking me out to ask, “You are Americain, no?” When I answered, “Texan, actually,” she actually shook her finger at me while saying, “I do not like your Booosh.” Under the full moon around a bonfire on a beach in St. Maarten, no less.
The French term for thinking of a retort after the incident is “l’esprit d’ escalier” (wit of the staircase), meaning that one only thinks of the killer answer after one is already going down the staircase. In this case, I should have replied, “Such passion! Such fire! You must be MARVELOUS in bed!”
It’s been a non-productive afternoon here at the Record offices, obviously.
Grant, do you need a hug, or something equally Christian in sentiment?
Actually, For the Record, you probably should have checked your fly.
We would read your blog bethany, but you haven’t blogged since 11/14. Even that is about some other blogger. Can we get back on topic?
Unsubstantiated pride
Unwarranted arrogance
Someone replied a while back that Texas can legally secede. Is that true? If so, it is pretty cool. I vote that we secede and elect George W. as our president, if for no other reason than to see Jack E. Jett’s head explode.
Let me see if I have this right. Jack Jett post something from another source. Then Daniel, Behthany and Amanda spend the day bashing him for posting something someone else said and for his lack of humor.
The topic being why people from Oklahoma do not like Texas. I just want to make sure I am following this thread as it is meant to be. It make me want to cut and paste.
You all really need to get a life and stop this silliness. With Sarah Palin preparing her onslaught and our women about to be enslaved as we become commie workers, we have bigger fish to deal with.
Mark my words, states will be removed in the next year as we become a one entity.
Dont believe me..look up Amero online and see some of the documents that have been found. Say good bye freedom.
Oh, and Rhode Island Rawks.
I forgot to add, because that would make my homosexual feelings for him go away.
jnw, secession is tragically simple: Texas had the guaranteed right to secede from the Union from 1845 to 1865, from the time the Republic of Texas became a state to the end of the Civil War. The deal was originally written that way because the still-young USA had doubts about the ability to govern Texas’ vast spaces. So when Texas finally voted for secession, the last Confederate state to do so, and only after three state-wide votes, they were fully entitled to do so – again, like no other state. However, when Texas was forced to re-apply for admission to the Union at the end of the War of Northern Aggression, the state was forced to agree never to secede again.
However, Texas has always retained the right to subdivide ourselves into as many as five states. We could have the State of East Texas, the State of South Texas, etc. Back in the first oil crisis (Bueller? Anyone?), the federal govt imposed gas pricing rules on Texas producers so that the state of, say, New Jersey was actually paying less for gas than Texas itself. That’s when subdivision talk cropped up again.
You’re welcome.
Drew, you don’t have that right. I have bashed no one. Find one phrase where I have. I concurred with Bethany that any assumptions about Amanda’s social milieu were necessarily baseless. This was my vilest moment today.
Oh, and jnw, that used to be true, but I’m pretty sure that proviso has lapsed, albeit relatively recently.
Oh, and we had our own Navy, too. One of the ships was named the Brutus. I’ve always liked that, but of course I’m the kind who actually reads all the credits at the end of a movie.
Um, FTR seems to know what he’s talking about.
For the record…im glad you can wiki but what you are failing to see is that when there are no states, it doesn’t matter.
And to close out what we’ll generously call my working afternoon: The Englishman and the cowboy were forced to share a train compartment traveling across Texas back in the day. The cowboy smirked, “Lookee here, Limey, we got on this train in Texas. We’re gonna ride all day, and all night, and when we wake up on this train tomorrow, we’ll still be in Texas. Whatdya think about THAT?”
The Englishman coolly replied, “In England we would have fixed a train like this.”
p.s. Shax – I’m proud to say every bit of that was off the top of my head, not a single Wiki reach whatsoever. Wanna play trivia for a dime a point?
1 Amero will be worth 13.5 dimes. Which is exactly how much our white women will be sold for.
We don’t need to look up anything. We all have a memory. You are an echo chamber.
God I love Edward Abbey, Jack Jett, and Bethany. I thought about submitting my five answers to the five questions and starting a non-blogger uprising. So there’s that.
And you are a human Cliff’s Notes.
Finally, someone has figured it out. Bethany is a Republican, and my Dick Cheney (and she will never live that down). Daniel throws down nonsense to a third party. I respond with nonsense, and we all get a Latin primer. JEJ reappears, I tease him because of the previous Jack haters, he freaks out, and the rest is history.
Not a bad Monday. My work here is done. Maybe they hate us because we are clever…
Um, Amanda. Um. I think you’ll find the original commenter posited that you were Bethany’s Dick Cheney.
@thirdparty: Yhecouefgsc higvfp iuegbf!
Dang it, I wanted a Dick. Thanks for clearing that up.
The boys on this blog are going to have to start eating their Wheaties…
Amanda
So you tease me because you want to see me freak out and you want to join the Jack haters? Have I got that right? Because I am really, sincerely trying to figure out why I can’t post on this site and be part of a debate without your off topic and negagtive comments towards me.
So there is not really a reason you dislike me, you just make the negative comments because of “previous Jack haters” and you enjoy seeing me freak out.
While I understand homophobes hating on me, I don’t understand where you are coming from. I have asked that you email me to see if we can’t mend this. I enjoy being part of a debate in a city and state that I grew up in and love. Let me know, what it is that creates this negative vibe towards me.
So can you address the situation without sarcasm? It may very well be my own ignorance that I am not understanding your last statement. I not really freaking out as much as I have a very curious nature and while I understand hate from homophobia, I don’t understand hate for the sake of hate.
Again, you can either email me at info@jackejett.com, or if you prefer, let me know here. I got a really sweet email from an Amanda that worked a D Magazine one time and so I am assuming that you are a different Amanda (thus the one, two or original)or that something I have done that has soured you.
Daniel, thank you for your reply. I do get confused on what constitutes humor versus snarkness on this blog. I think I have seen you be a victim of this too. Perhaps we all do. I have always placed public apologies when someone thinks I have crossed the line. On the other hand, can you imagine people claiming hatred for you…and these people have never met you and are basing it on some persona? I don’t understand hate for the fun of it.
Bethany, I think you have made a decision about me and that is just the way it will be. It doesn’t really matter what the issue is, what my opinion of the topic is, you are pre-destined to disagree with some catty comments, like the people who would like to see my head explode, ground me, shut me up, etc…you know it, you have seen it.
Some of your comments are hysterical and have me laughing out loud. Some of your opinions are enlightening. My only question for you would be is it necessary to come in and bash/snark/humor me with every single freaking comment I ever make?
Anyway, as Amanda (one,two or orininal) says
I guess it is all in a days work.
Wheaties were invented in Texas, and more famous athletes on the Wheaties box come from Texas than anywhere else. Texans also invented milk, and cereal bowls, and breakfast itself. And mornings. And the state of Colorado, which if you ironed it out flat, would just look like Lubbock County, but without the scenery.
Where was the bashing from me, Jack? I’m curious as to what constitutes bashing, versus disagreeing with you.
And I’ve not made any decision about you, either. I think you’re a little quick to assume I’ve got some kind of nefarious intent, but I can’t govern reactions.
Double doggone darn. I’ve been doing business all day and missed out on all the fun.
I’m one of those got here lately Texans.
I think the reason we’re disliked so much is everyone wants to be part of something bigger than themselves.
We are. They aren’t. Have you ever seen a New Yorker than wasn’t bigger than New York? How about an Iowan that wasn’t bigger than Iowa?
Jack, Amanda, I know you both, play nice. Pretend you’re at my house instead of Wicks.
Jack, as I said…I tried to make make a joke, this morning, BECAUSE WE LIKE YOU. Some of us don’t like censorship on this blog (either by deleting comments or kicking off posters). Since you’ve been MIA for a while, I thought it would be funny to put the #2 of the first post (because you have been so maligned on this blog.) (It’s a literary device, giving the finger, so to speak, to the Jack Haters). Look carefully at what I wrote, in context…now re-read my nest to the last post. I didn’t say I did it “so that” you would freak out…I said, “JEJ reappears, I tease him because of the previous Jack haters, he freaks out, and the rest is history.” Big difference. I truly believe you are capable of understanding snark, I do…at least I want to…I can’t speak for everyone, but the regulars as I read them today didn’t attack you. Now you have, in fact, freaked out, and it validates the arguments of those who have been critical of you in the past.
Relax, Diva, the popular kids like you.
Maybe they hate us because we are nice.
Amanda
That response makes no sense whatsoever.
Zero. So you like to shove people into a corner, then when they defend themselves, you call them out for not having a sense of humor.
The answer is that you are a ****less arrogant bitch who was probably a bully in school and haven’t grown up enough to grow out of it.
So go **** yourself because it is clear no one else will.
Now that is ****ing funny….whorebait.
Wow…that wasn’t over the top at all. Or bashy. Or rude. Not in the least.
Where can I contribute to the Fund to Relieve the Suffering of the Persecuted Jack E. Jett?
These bitches are the answer to the original question.
If it weren’t for Jack E. Jett this blog would be one big bore. Let the cows go to pasture.
What that Amanda person said: Jack, as I said…I tried to make make a joke, this morning, BECAUSE WE LIKE YOU. Some of us don’t like censorship on this blog (either by deleting comments or kicking off posters). Since you’ve been MIA for a while, I thought it would be funny to put the #2 of the first post (because you have been so maligned on this blog.) (It’s a literary device, giving the finger, so to speak, to the Jack Haters). Look carefully at what I wrote, in context…now re-read my nest to the last post. I didn’t say I did it “so that” you would freak out…I said, “JEJ reappears, I tease him because of the previous Jack haters, he freaks out, and the rest is history.” Big difference. I truly believe you are capable of understanding snark, I do…at least I want to…I can’t speak for everyone, but the regulars as I read them today didn’t attack you. Now you have, in fact, freaked out, and it validates the arguments of those who have been critical of you in the past.
Relax, Diva, the popular kids like you.
What Jack read: Jack, as I said…I tried to make … everyone ….attack you
Bethany, can we get a grammar check. “****less”? Is that a word? Part of speech?
Whorebait just pushed the Diva too far.
Is that what you wanted whorebait?
Dear PFOD,
Yes, it’s what I said to myself this morning.
Love,
Whorebait
Amanda the Lame. I know you and that **** about beiing in West Hollywood is a big lie.
You know it. Everyone around you knows it.
Hey Whorebait. What is real about you?
so..let’s see. Amanda = Dick Cheney. Amanda = Whorebait. Ergo, Dick Cheney = Whorebait.
Add worthless cows and you have a bingo bitch
Bethany, I get it now…if I am both Dick Cheney and Whorebait, then JEJ is Karl Rove? Or is that you?
Hey Amanda
Jack Jett just said those things cause he likes you so much. He was just making fun of the hag haters. He really likes you. He just wanted to see you freak out and you did. He was trying to make a joke but I guess you just didn’t get it. You really have to learn to take a joke. Whorebait is a compliment.
Now make sure you run into Tim’s office and get him to take down all the bad words he said about you.
I’m so confused. I think I’ll go drink now.
I’m laughing so hard I can’t type.
Does D Magazine pay Jack E. Jett to post on this blog? If not, how can I go about getting in touch with him to post on my blog.
The only time I see a popular blog posting, it is always about Jack E. Jett. I had no clue who he was until I started reading this blog. He really is the ruler of this blog, that is for sure. Please put me on an email list to let me know when he post.
Drinks and drinking were invented in Texas. (and just when you thought it was safe to read this blog again…)
That’s the first sign of syphilis, you chlamydia-ridden whorebait.
TO, you should pay Sandra, then, too.
Jack E. Jett can carry this blog by himself.
Look at the boards. The comments speak volumes or a lack thereof. One comment here, two there, four over here. However, Jack E. Jett makes a comment and wowie zowie, tons o’ hits. To the cyber moon Alice, to the cyber moon! You will not find this level of chatter on any other blog in town. He is our own older version of Perez Hilton. Real one and Beth deserve credit for being the Dawn to his Tony Orlando.
Tiiiiiiiiiiiiiie a yellow ribbon round the old oak treeeeeee, it’s been three long yeaaaaaaaaaaars do you still love me?
Wow, guys, that’s not obvious at all.
Knock three times on the ceiling if you want me….
Twice on the pipes, if the answer is noooooo.
Oh my sweet thang…Knock 3 times on the windwow…ooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhohhhhhhh(sequewayinto……Take a letter Maria…..make it to my wife….say I ain’t a coming home….gonna make a new life (in Branson)doooh dooh..mmmh mmh
It just so happens I’m free tonight
Would you like to have a burger with me…..
ooh ahh take a letter maria…..
Damnation
Click your heels now….knock three times…
three times on the ceiling if you want me…twice on the pipes. BANG BANG if the answer is noooooo…oh my sweet thing,,,,,(seguewayinto) i want you to….take a letter maria…send it to my wife….tell that beeatch I aint a coming home gonna start a new life with some…..(seguewayinto) sweet cherry wine….dooh dooh dooh, good times never had much wood…dooooo doo do do.. i’ve been inclined…(seguewayinto) take a letter bashira…….send it to Iraq…
I recently moved to Montana and I’m asked all the time about the great Montana-Texas rivalry. I’m like, “Huh?”
They actually hate Californians up here. As proud as Texans are with our state, when we move elsewhere we tend to assimilate. Californians on the other hand try to make everywhere like California.
I had a nice long conversation on yesterday, while sitting in a bar in Las Vegas, with a friend that lived in LA for an extended period of time. It’s not that they hate us, it’s that they know absolutely nothing about us.
They are scared to come to Texas because they think all of our law enforcement officers are rednecks that will drag them off to prison simply because they “ern’t from ’round here”.
They think the entire state looks like a John Wayne movie. It never dawns on them that John Wayne’s movies were filmed in Southern California.
They think we aren’t friendly. Really.
They think we’re all carrying guns, and that we use them, a lot.
And even though our education system is ranked considerably higher than theirs, they think we’re all ignorant hillbillies from the Duke’s of Hazzard.
I filled him in on the stereotypes we have of Californians, but I won’t go into them here. It’s not a CA thread.
Team Obama, you are absolutely right. This is the Jack E. Jett Show just as sure as you’re born, and Amanda and Bethany are Lenny and Squiggy. And just like any cartoon or sitcom, the arc is comfortingly familiar: When the asterisks come on, you know the episode’s almost over. After that, there’s only the little coda “chaser” scene (whatever they call it in the biz). Then freeze frame; theme music; roll credits over the freeze frame.
Great, Daniel. Now I have J. Geils Band in my head.
We have Ray Wiley Hubbard and they don’t.
Texas is a state of mind that I have been living in.
Screw you I’m from Texas.
As for Oklahoma, Its up against the wall, redneck mother.
Davey Crockett said it best, after losing in an election in Tennessee:
“You can all go to Hell, and I will go to Texas.”
I like his sentiment. If you do not like Texas, get out of it. Everyone who lives outside of Texas and does not like it, refer to Davey’s statement.
Don’t blame Bush on us. His parents were from Maine. Not every Texan voted for him, either for governor or president. I am a Texas Democrat and proud.
We did not kill President Kennedy. Nixon, the Mob, the CIA, the FBI and/or the Communists did it. They can all go where Davey recommended, too. There are many Kennedy admirers in Texas, including this Irish Catholic.
With a child in 7th grade, I’m now experiencing a 2nd round of Texas history (maybe I’ll remember it now). It makes me incredibly proud of our state. To name a few items:
- The Old 300
- Stephen F Austin
- Sam Houston
- Juan Seguin
- The Hill Country
- Fiesta San Antonio
- Wurstfest
- Zilker Park
- Houston Ballet
- Menil Collection
- Nasher
- Chuy’s
- Space Center
- Big Bend
- Spindletop
- 268,820 square miles
- The University of Texas (Give ‘em hell, Give ‘em hell, Go Horns Go!)
I was born in Dallas and have lived here all my life (almost 50 years) and I hate Texas, too. Why do I live here? My relatives live here plus inertia. Also, television helps.
Scattershooting about Texas:
Uncivilized, uncultured, know nothings, defenders of slavery, defenders of Jim Crow, defenders of States’ Rights, segregationists, anti-intellectual, spit on Johnson, H. L. Hunt and his ilk, now that I have mine–every man for himself, God-given property rights, Babbitts-Bushes-bible thumpers, holier-than-thou, sanctimonious hypocrites, too hot, too cold, too dry, too wet, no skiing.
Small comforts: the Kimball Art Museum building and its art, the Nasher building and the work by James Turrell, the Menil building and its art, horny toads, roadrunners, bluebonnets.
I was at Washington-on-the-Brazos on Friday. After the tour, and the remarkable tour guide, I was ready to fight San Jacinto all over again. God Bless Texas!
Are you serious? Anyone surprised that Oklahomans dislike all things Texan needs to get out more.
The dirty little secret is that we’re soooo
jealous. It gets all over us that we’re neither as smart as Dubya nor as refined as Anna Nicole Smith.
I am a snowboarder at Monarch Mountain Colorado and I would say that I hate Texans but after I thought about it I don’t think I do. Some of the problems I have is that they all wear their Longhorn jackets and jeans(in snow WTF!) basically looking like noobs. The Texans who can ride decently and dress for the part spend a $hit ton of money on riduculously expensive skis, snowboards, bindings, and boots then act like they are completely bad ass and either use their equipment once or incorrectly. They then proceed to use closed life lines or lift lines for SKI SCHOOL ONLY as their own personal highways to the front of the line. However these are mistakes that I have made, other Coloradoans have made, or other Coloradoans I know have made. I was raised to hate Texans but I really see no reason too. They just happen to be the least intelligent looking people on the mountain and the fact they are so easy to distinguish doesn’t help their case.