RE: Why Does Everyone Hate Texans?

Colorado expat Bill Marvel answers the question in this month’s issue of 5280. Among the grievances, he writes:

Texans drive too fast. They’re noisy. They brag. They travel in packs, despoiling the land like grasshoppers or grackles. They’re déclassé.

Included in the article is a quote from former Dallas Business Journal Publisher Huntley Paton, who grew up in Denver. You’ll just have to click on the link above to read it all.

Yellow Saturday: American Goldfinches Arrive

Put down your newspaper or laptop and pick up a pair of binoculars: ’tis the season for winter birds. Over the past few weeks my yard has been populated with white-throated sparrows (right) and juncos and now goldfinches (left).  What a great excuse to head down to the new Trinity River Audubon Center. Is this a great city or what!

Why Martini Park Closed

In the June issue of the “print product,” Eric wrote lovingly of the cougar hunting grounds known as Martini Park. The joint has shuttered — essentially because it sold too much booze. What? Yes. Nancy has the story over on SideDish.

Rod Dreher Writes About His Dog’s Penis

If you’re familiar with the conservative DMN editorial columnist, this will shock you as it did me. The title of his post: “A Dog and His Boner.” Shocked, I tell you!

Sleeper Hit: Dinner in the Wild

OK, let’s be real. Museums are great, but I don’t expect much from museum parties. Last night, the Museum of Nature and Science board of trustees hosted the annual “Dinner in the Wild” fundraiser event at, of all random places, the Automobile Building at Fair Park. The place was packed (photo on jump, H/T to C.S.), with the likes of Lyda Hill, Jan and Trevor Rees-Jones, event chairs John Sughrue and his lovely wife Marlene Fogarty, Joe Harberg, Erin Mathews, and Tom Leppert. (more…)

NAMWOLF: The Worst Acronym Ever?

I made the soul-crushing drive to Irving today to check into a group that sounds like Man-Wolf. (For non-nerds out there, Man-Wolf is an obscure Marvel comic book character who fought Spider Man.) Imagine my disappointment when I learned this group has nothing to do with the beast that gains furry superhuman powers in moonlight. No, the group’s acronym is NAMWOLF - the National Association of Minority and Women-Owned Law Firms. An unfortunate acronym for a group of lawyers, if ever there were one. Jump for a description of what actually went on Friday… (more…)

Re: Weekend Birding Project

Thanks to all who participated in the guess-the-bird-in-the-picture sent in by a FrontBurnervian Birder. I guessed it was a Pine Warbler, but Mr. Matt Mendenhall, associate editor of Birder’s World, differs:

It’s definitely a warbler, but there’s so much direct sunlight on that bird that it washes out a lot of color and field marks. It’s possible [Pine Warbler], but it looks to me like the undertail coverts and belly are yellow, and on a pine warbler, those spots should be white. To my eye, it looks like a female Yellow Warbler.

So Anne, way to go. You win. Next?

Here’s a Weekend Birding Project

A FrontBurnervian Birder (‘memba them?) has spotted this yellow/green bird in his yard in Richardson. He lives about two blocks from a creek. Double click on the picture to make it bigger. Post your guess. First one to get the correct answer, may win something. Remember, American goldfinch season is just around the corner. Hummingbird feeders down. Thistle feeders up. That’s what I always say! Meanwhile: enjoy the show.

Re: Leading Off (Squirrel Item)

I have been racked with guilt since doing the deed Sunday. But also, yes, filled with pride. In response to Eric’s taunt and to satisfy the curiosity of Those Who Care, I’ll tell you about killing that squirrel.

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Help “W”anted: President Seeks Administrative Assistant

A FrontBurnervian comes forth with the following job posting for a Bush office in Dallas:

The Selectee will perform a substantive variety of administrative support and customer service duties, critical to the daily office administration of the George W. Bush Protective Division.  Duties include, but are not limited to:  assists the Administrative Officer in providing administrative technical assistance, guidance, and service to the Special Agent in Charge and other division employees…

It didn’t mention anything about keeping a good working supply of chain saws and matchbooks at the ready for clearing brush. I call dibs for him to start hacking vegetation in my backyard once he gets here. That ought to keep him busy for the next four years.

The Car-Killing Tree, Continued

Since there was a bit of chatter about the tree in my neighborhood that fell over and compacted the Lexus SUV next door, I thought an update was in order. For starters, it turns out my amateur diagnosis was correct: the monkey grass surrounding the tree is what caused it to rot and then topple over. (It was a pecan tree, I believe, if I’m correctly remembering what my wife told me, which is rare.) We had an arborist come over and inspect a few trees in our yard and the immediate environs. The one in our yard is fine, though it needs more roots showing–a counterintuitive approach in bleach-blond Dallas. A couple across the street, however, are set to come down, mostly due to the same problem that (ahem) befell the car-killing tree.

If you live in a tree-filled area, not a bad idea to get someone out to check on them. The city will do it for free, but it takes a long time. The guy who came to our house was not from the city, did it for free, and was very reasonable on price when it came to fixing a few of the problems. If you want his name, check the comments; I’m sure my wife will jump on with the answer.

Neighborhood Tree Kills Car Dead

This afternoon, while lazing away my Sunday, I was briefly jolted out of my reverie by a loud noise. I assumed it was a nearby car wreck or, since we live near the train tracks, the normal sound of trains starting and stopping and doing other train-like things. When my wife came home not long after, I found out what actually made the sound: one of the giant, old trees in our neighborhood had fallen over, from the roots, coming to a hard stop on the car parked in the drive of the house next door. Can you guess what kind of car it used to be?

It could have been much worse. The owners of the now-totaled car were just about to leave the house and take their boat to the lake. Two more photos after the jump.

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How the Media Played the Death of Hercules

As you may have heard, Hercules, a 43-year-old gorilla, died Wednesday from a heart attack, after undergoing a procedure to help relieve pain caused by degenerative spinal disease. The Dallas Morning News responded with a nice tribute, while also summing up the events of his death and touching on the details of his 1998 attack on zoo keeper Jennifer McClurg (and, of course, the death of Jabari). Solid work. The Associated Press, on the other hand, went with this headline: “Hercules, gorilla that once attacked handler, dies.” That fact is brought up again in the lede, and kicks off the second half of the obit. (The Houston Chronicle used the same AP piece, but handled it more elegantly.) You know what, it’s probably not even a big deal and I’m just being sensitive because I was a big fan of Hercules and the other gorillas at the Zoo. In any case, cue this.

‘Possum Takes It On the Chin; Dallas Looks Good

Woke up this morning, opened the front door, and found an opossum dead. I put on my Varmint Gloves, held my breath, double bagged the corpse and put it on the curb. Then, I called 3-1-1 and told the City of Dallas to pick it up. Twenty minutes later, a city guy calls my cell phone, asks me what’s in the bag (I tell him) and next thing I know, the carcass is gone. Moral of the story: If you want something disappeared, call 3-1-1. I’m not sure if this works in all cases (the removal of in-laws, annoying supervisors and rich widows might require more planning). The opossum above isn’t the same as the one that was bumped off. You wouldn’t have wanted to see how that fellow looked, believe me.

Heat Index: Comparing Dallas To Its Sister Cities

In 1977, it was hot in Dallas. Really hot. So hot, that we couldn’t believe how hot. So we decided to see how hot it was in cities situated like ours around the world. Dallas sits at a latitude of 32 47N, and the cities closest to us on the parallel are Charleston, Tijuana, Casablanca, and Nanking. Since there’s been some talk about how hot Dallas is again this summer, I thought you might like a little report.

Charleston will hit around 90 with high humidity (of course).  Tijuana is in the 80s for the rest of the week, perhaps to be heated up by occasional gunfire. Casablanca is 84 right now, and the forecast looks to be about perfect. Nanking will wander up into the high 90s early next week. So, to sum up, everywhere else is great, and Dallas is not. So at around 4 pm today, when it hits 99 degrees, you can officially start complaining.

This information, of course, took only seconds to gather. In 1977, it was a little more difficult. That year’s recap after the jump: (more…)

Quake Shakes LA, Hit Ordered On Suspect Roach At D

Coincidence? I think not.

Not A Great Week To Go To Padre

Unless you want to say a personal hello to Tropical Storm Dolly.

Monday Morning Bluebird Talk

Greetings from the unofficial D office in East Texas where the blueberries and bluebirds are at the peak of their season. Early this morning, I opened the nesting box of my four bluebird chicks and monitored their progress for the last time. Noting the clarity of their eyes and wing development, it looks like they are preparing to leave the nest in the next day or two. At this point it’s critical to avoid scaring them or causing them to fall from their nest before they’re ready–we don’t want any premature fledging. Enjoy.

Meet The Fockers’ Firstborn

I’m sure you all remember meeting The Fockers, my once-faithful bluebirds that moved their nest at the beginning of summer to my next door neighbor’s house. Well guess what? After a month of feeding them hundreds of dollars of mealworms, they not only returned to my yard, last weekend they presented me with four new chicks. Here’s a picture of one resting in my meaty hand.

Odd Bird Sighting In Editor’s Backyard

What makes it even more odd: It wasn’t Nancy who saw it. It was me. I ask her and her fellow feather fans to help me identify the fowl seen at left. I admit the picture doesn’t make it very easy. But maybe this helps: the thing walked like a rooster, seemed to be flightless, and had a yellow head and yellow feathers on its back (though not quite yellow tailfeathers). Followup question: Is it edible?

(Larger, uncropped photos here and here.)