Articles about mythical beasts

Leading Off (3/18/13)

Cruz In Control: Say what you want about Ted Cruz, the guy’s a freshman Senator getting presidential buzz in March, three years before the next presidential election. This guy is not going away anytime soon:

Fracking Fuels Boom Towns: Gas production is driving the rebirth of tiny towns throughout rural Texas.  But don’t worry, fracking has nothing to do with this:

What is Going on With This Fracking Water?

Bigfoot Not Spotted in Fort Worth This Weekend: Bigfoot hunters descended on Fort Worth this past weekend for the Texas Bigfoot Conference. Unfortunately, Bigfoot was a no show.

Dozens of Birds Found Dead in Arlington Intersection. In Other News, End Times Are Near.

This kind of story seems to pop up every few months around the country, with a broadcaster always closing with, “One of the birds was taken to a local vet to determine the cause of death.” Then WE NEVER FIND OUT. What sort of Paul Thomas Anderson-led bird-killing cabal is keeping this information from us?

Big Tex’s New Hands Are Creepy

The folks at the State Fair released a video this morning showing the CGI creation of Big Tex’s new hands, set to be unveiled in September. The most disturbing part of the video is — unless I’m mistaken — the lack of sound. Just a floating, morphing CGI appendage against a black backdrop. It’s a cutting-room floor Kubrick clip.

The fair also announced that it has raised $45,000 to rebuild Big Tex, which really doesn’t seem like that much. Anyway: hands.

New Bill Would Limit Challenges to Harold Simmons’ West Texas Radioactive Waste Dump

Harold Simmons. Illustration: Mark Fredrickson

Harold Simmons. Illustration: Mark Fredrickson

A bill filed recently by San Angelo Rep. Drew Darby would limit challenges to the West Texas radioactive waste dump owned by Dallas billionaire (and evil genius) Harold Simmons. The bill, according to the Texas Observer, is “a grab-bag of measures that would put up roadblocks for groups or individuals challenging the company even as it allows Waste Control to bring in ‘hotter’ waste.”

“It guts the protections of that assure citizens get a fair hearing on any changes in the radioactive waste dump,” Tom Smith of Public Citizen told the paper.

Darby has received $20,000 in campaign contributions the past two years from the dump’s parent company, Waste Control Specialists. Darby’s chief-of-staff characterized the bill as aiding “operational flexibility.” Complicating the site’s regulatory process is the fact that while it sits in Andrews County, the closest and most affected town is actually in New Mexico. (Here’s a Google Map view of the Waste Control location, and Eunice, New Mexico. There’s also a review of Waste Control that calls the dump’s owners “Possibly some of the biggest criminals in the history of our state.”)

“The upshot of this is that it allows the dump to be quickly filled by highly profitable radioactive materials from out of state,” Public Citizen’s Smith told the Observer, “enriching Harold Simmons now. As a result when we need the dump 30 years form now for the South Texas Project nuclear reactor or the Comanche Peak reactor, there won’t be space.”

Here Are Two Bobcats Screaming at Each Other in A Carrollton Neighborhood

If I’ve learned anything from this video, it’s that bobcats make the worst noise known to man, after every Supertramp song ever recorded. That and I’d probably keep the kids locked inside for a few weeks if I lived in Carrollton.

(h/t CBS 11)

Cowboys Want Tony Romo to Sign Long-term Deal

Cowboys EVP Stephen Jones said Tuesday that he’d like to lock up Tony Romo for a long-term deal, and that the quarterback is “a great partner.” From ESPN:

“Tony is a key piece of what we’re about going forward,” Jones said Tuesday. “We’re certainly going to be looking at his situation (in) time. We’ve historically (extended contracts) with quarterbacks for the Dallas Cowboys ahead of time. We did it with Troy (Aikman) and we certainly want to look at that with Tony so we can all move forward in terms of how we want to play around our salary cap with our team. Tony is the key piece in terms of how your cap is represented.”

Romo is in the last year of his deal, and is owed $11.5 million in 2013. Troy Aikman also stuck up for the embattled QB Wednesday, saying he believes Romo can lead the team to a Super Bowl. “He’s a special player,” he told The Fan. “Unfortunately, not enough people recognize that.”

Like I’ve said before, average at best.

Dallas Mavericks Won’t Shave Until They Reach .500

They’re not that close, but there’s a long home stand going on right now. Mostly, I’m just mentioning the no-shaving thing to run the photo Jason Gallagher tweeted to Dirk Nowitzki, saying, “Hope you don’t end up looking like this.”

Dennis Rodman Has Written a Children’s Book, For Those of You Looking For a Crazier Bedtime Story

Source: Amazon

South Oak Cliff native, NBA Hall of Famer, and all-around madman Dennis Rodman can now add one more jewel to his crown: children’s book author. The tome is titled “Dennis the Wild Bull,” obviously, and one copy is currently available on Amazon. “More than anything, I just want little kids today just to understand: Ain’t no matter what you do in life – be different, rich or poor, man – guess what? It’s OK to be who you are pretty much and you’ll be accepted,” Rodman told the Associated Press. ”…For a guy like me to be very eccentric, to even go to extremes to write a children’s book with all the wild things I do and make it believable was pretty much incredible.”

Incredible for whom is still up in the air.

Texas Legends Trying to Lure Allen Iverson

From ESPN’s Marc Stein:

Iverson has likewise resisted the Legends’ overtures so far this season — as well as a similar offer last season — but sources say that the Legends are trying again now because they’ve moved back to the top of the list in the D-League’s waiver line, meaning they’d have an unobstructed path to signing Iverson if he could be convinced to put his name in the D-League’s player pool.

The Legends’ pitch to Iverson centers around the fact they’ve just convinced NBA veterans Delonte West and Rashad McCants to join their team with similar intentions, after the Legends signed another 37-year-old earlier this month — point guard Mike James – and wound up putting James in position to earn a 10-day callup to the Mavericks that turned into a guaranteed contract after James completed his second 10-day deal Sunday.

Just imagine Delonte and Iverson playing on the same team. Quick list of things that would be better than that: ______. Nothing. Nothing would be better than that. This random Twitter user channels similar excitement:

Gaga Fans Camp Out For Chance to Get in the Pit

Lady Gaga, during her 2011 stop in Dallas. Photo: Tiffany Lane

A group of die-hard Lady Gaga fans have planted themselves outside of the American Airlines Center, waiting for their chance to earn a spot in the pit for Tuesday’s show. They started arriving at 4 a.m. Sunday, and will stay until 10 a.m. Tuesday. From Pegasus News:

Another passionate fan, Brandan Gonzales, 19, set up shop at 2 p.m. with his concert outfit in tow. Inside his bag were 3” heels — shoes he says he wears whenever he wants (but especially at Lady Gaga and Madonna concerts).

“I don’t believe in gender-specific clothes; I like to express myself differently,” said Gonzales.

The fans better hope Tuesday’s severe storms hold off long enough to get their wristbands.

Former — and Now Indicted — New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin Is Living in Frisco

This bizarre story comes from our friends at the Times-Picayune, one of the greatest newspapers in the country. Seems that Ray Nagin, the former New Orleans mayor who was recently indicted on 21 counts of public corruption, has set up shop in Frisco, in a neighborhood where “the houses all match, as do the plants and small trees in the tiny yards – recalling the ersatz town in the movie ‘The Truman Show,’ without the bright colors.”

Intrepid reporter Gordon Russell:

It would be hard to think of a place in America more unlike New Orleans than this one — by some accounts the nation’s fastest-growing city, a place where cranes and bulldozers are converting ranch land into ranch homes at a dizzying pace, and where the dining options boil down to a choice among Applebee’s, Chili’s or the Olive Garden. But this is where Ray Nagin has chosen to settle down: in a quiet subdivision of 300 modest townhomes called Bella Casa, with streets named after Italian cities, backing up to the Dallas Parkway.

It’s the sort of neighborhood one can easily disappear into, and Nagin has done just that. In interviews earlier this month, many neighbors of the former New Orleans mayor — a fixture on national television after the flooding of his city a few years ago — were surprised to learn of their famous interloper’s identity.

Truly screwy, and worth your time.

Manti Te’o's Girlfriend Was at the Stars’ Season Opener Saturday

The Stars PR department, known for its sharpness, pointed out the celeb as well:

Someone Has Been Trolling the Perot Museum Online, Calling it ‘Fairytale Propaganda’

Source: Reddit

Jesse Morrell is a Christian, a Christian who recently visited the Perot Museum of Nature and Science. He lives in Lindale, 90 minutes east of Dallas off I-20, where he’s the head of a group called Open Air Outreach, which is “dedicated to taking the Gospel of Jesus Christ to where it truly belongs — to lost sinners.” His approach has not been accepted by all. In his self-written Wikipedia user profile, Morrell addressed some of these criticisms, saying he is “often called a ‘heretic’ and a ‘Pelagian’ by Calvinists, but he is in good company because these same Calvinists say the same thing about great revivalists like Charles Finney, William Booth, and John Wesley.”

As you can see above, Morrell did not enjoy his visit to the Perot Museum. He called it “fairytale propaganda” and was stunned that a science museum included photos of Charles Darwin and Richard Dawkins. Imagine that, a science museum with photos of scientists. The above screengrab is a Google review Morrell wrote, brought to the attention of the masses via Reddit. Redditors got a good laugh at Morrell’s expense, but thought he was nothing more than a troll. Wrong.

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Cowboys Hire Monte Kiffin as Defensive Coordinator, Internet Makes Collective ‘But He’s so Goshdurn Old!’ Joke

More.

International Writing Superstar Michael ‘J.’ Mooney Talks About ‘The Most Amazing Bowling Story Ever’

Mike’s not really in the office too much, because he spends most of his days plotting new ways to get on year-end best-of lists. Many of those accolades this year came due to his “The Most Amazing Bowling Story Ever.” He was recently interviewed for Gangrey about the story. Listen above.