Articles about Hold On To Your Effin Hat
Hostess Cakes Sold; The Twinkie Lives!
Party time.
Not that it was every truly in danger of going permanently extinct, but the Twinkie is back. The New York Post broke the news last night about the Irving-based cakery:
[Billionaire private equity mogul Leon] Black’s Apollo Global Management was the only entity to make a bid for the snacks business of bankrupt Hostess Brands – grabbing ownership of the stable of well known brands for $410 million, The Post has learned.
The private equity firm — known for making money off distressed assets — teamed with veteran food exec Dean Metropoulos on the bid for the business, which also includes Ho-Hos, Donettes and Dolly Madison in addition to Twinkies. The deadline for bids was Monday at 5 p.m.
Hostess creditor Silver Point Capital and Hurst Capital in recent days had submitted letters indicating an intention to bid – but in the end neither stepped up to the plate with a firm proposal.
As we all know, Metropoulos also owns Pabst Blue Ribbon. I would never, ever make the assertion that these two treats are a match made in trashy heaven. Reuters caught up with Metropoulos’ son Daren, who said the snack cakes could be back on shelves by the summer.
Fort Worth Couple Raffling Off Their Unborn Daughter’s Middle Name
This baby’s middle name could be all yours.
Fort Worth real estate agent Drew Myers and his wife already have the first name of their daughter picked out. Ily will come into the world in August, with an abbreviation for a name: Ily = I Love You. Problem is, they don’t have a middle name for their daughter. That’s where you come in.
The couple’s had difficulties conceiving in the past, unsure if they’d be able to have another baby to team up with their son Crash. Then Tanya got the good news — pregnant — and they started counting their blessings:
TK and I are thrilled that God blessed us with another child, but we’re also excited that we get an opportunity to use this name, which carries so much significance for us.
So…with our daughter’s first name taken care of – we’ve shifted gears to the middle name.
Go on.
New Bill Would Limit Challenges to Harold Simmons’ West Texas Radioactive Waste Dump
Harold Simmons. Illustration: Mark Fredrickson
A bill filed recently by San Angelo Rep. Drew Darby would limit challenges to the West Texas radioactive waste dump owned by Dallas billionaire (and evil genius) Harold Simmons. The bill, according to the Texas Observer, is “a grab-bag of measures that would put up roadblocks for groups or individuals challenging the company even as it allows Waste Control to bring in ‘hotter’ waste.”
“It guts the protections of that assure citizens get a fair hearing on any changes in the radioactive waste dump,” Tom Smith of Public Citizen told the paper.
Darby has received $20,000 in campaign contributions the past two years from the dump’s parent company, Waste Control Specialists. Darby’s chief-of-staff characterized the bill as aiding “operational flexibility.” Complicating the site’s regulatory process is the fact that while it sits in Andrews County, the closest and most affected town is actually in New Mexico. (Here’s a Google Map view of the Waste Control location, and Eunice, New Mexico. There’s also a review of Waste Control that calls the dump’s owners “Possibly some of the biggest criminals in the history of our state.”)
“The upshot of this is that it allows the dump to be quickly filled by highly profitable radioactive materials from out of state,” Public Citizen’s Smith told the Observer, “enriching Harold Simmons now. As a result when we need the dump 30 years form now for the South Texas Project nuclear reactor or the Comanche Peak reactor, there won’t be space.”
Leading Off (2/25/13)
Sequester Cuts Would Burn in Texas: If automatic cuts to federal spending kick in Friday, Texas stands to lose millions in funding to military bases, ports, pre-school services, tuition assistance, teachers, environmental programs, law enforcement, and more according to state-by-state cut details released by the White House Sunday.
Mayor’s Education Fix a Bore: The Dallas Morning News’ Tod Robberson has been tracking the progress of the education component of Mayor Rawlings’ GrowSouth initiative, and, as it turns out, students get bored and don’t pay attention during large assemblies hosted by local celebs high school kids have never heard of. Who would have thought?
Visitors Stranded on Zoo Monorail: Okay, forget those images of children dangling helplessly while a tiger paces below licking his chops. Sure, firefighters had to rescue about 100 people who were stuck on the Dallas Zoo’s monorail Saturday, but the monorail did not stall over any animal exhibits.
Four-Alarm Fire Takes Down Shooting Range: As it turns out, the reason why it is illegal to fire tracer rounds in a shooting range is a pretty good one.
Woman Drives the Wrong Way on I35 For 15 Miles
I understand this happens sometimes. You’re unfamiliar with an intersection or set of on-ramps, and you accidentally take off the wrong way. I’ve done it, then corrected myself in a matter of seconds. A woman in Burleson last night went the wrong way for 15 miles. That’s like getting on Central Expressway in downtown Dallas, and staying on it until you hit the George Bush Turnpike. But you’re in the wrong lane.
Probably needless to say, she was eventually slapped with a DWI, after hitting two cars and getting taken down by a police spike-strip.
Interview: Corbin Corona (Alternate Title: I Might Have Just Been Punk’d, if That Were Still a Thing)
Corbin Corona.
Last week, I stumbled across a music video by a 24-year-old Dallas resident named Corbin Corona. Intrigued, I watched the video, called him a clown, and had a good laugh. He challenged me on Twitter to an interview, and I accepted.
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If You Like Hockey Fights and Oil Terminology, Last Night’s Stars Game Was Your Eden
Neither Zac nor I (two of three people in the office right now) watch enough Stars hockey to know if this kind of terminology is commonplace, but it certainly is entertaining. During last night’s Stars-Red Wings game, a scrum broke out. It was a pretty good fight; a flurry of upper-cuts will do that. The best part, though, was the call, which included the following phrases:
- “Ahhhh the West Texas pump jack!”
- “He got hit with one late, but man was he pumping oil early!”
This barely makes sense in Dallas, but boy was it entertaining.
Texas Legends Trying to Lure Allen Iverson
From ESPN’s Marc Stein:
Iverson has likewise resisted the Legends’ overtures so far this season — as well as a similar offer last season — but sources say that the Legends are trying again now because they’ve moved back to the top of the list in the D-League’s waiver line, meaning they’d have an unobstructed path to signing Iverson if he could be convinced to put his name in the D-League’s player pool.
The Legends’ pitch to Iverson centers around the fact they’ve just convinced NBA veterans Delonte West and Rashad McCants to join their team with similar intentions, after the Legends signed another 37-year-old earlier this month — point guard Mike James – and wound up putting James in position to earn a 10-day callup to the Mavericks that turned into a guaranteed contract after James completed his second 10-day deal Sunday.
Just imagine Delonte and Iverson playing on the same team. Quick list of things that would be better than that: ______. Nothing. Nothing would be better than that. This random Twitter user channels similar excitement:
OH MY GOD IF ALLEN IVERSON COMES BACK IM GOING TO KILL SOMETHING OUT OF SHEER EXCITEMENT
— perrin moore (@perrinmoore96) January 28, 2013
Delonte West May Return to the Mavericks
Rumors swirling on this one, but we were actually able to talk to Delonte. He sent us his thoughts in animated form, in classic Delonte fashion:
Explosion Levels Lewisville House
WFAAÂ and NBC5 are live. First reactions online:
Half mile away from Lewisville explosion, felt it go right thru my body. Scary.
– Steve hartzfeld (@shart50) January 11, 2013
Trucks, trucks and more trucks. Gotta say, I’m glad the explosion was close to the fire station. #OldTown #Lewisville twitter.com/rachelinlife/s…
– Rachel Rushing (@rachelinlife) January 11, 2013
Lewisville Main Street is on fire.#breakingnews #fire twitter.com/cens_/status/2…
– B Collins (@cens_) January 11, 2013
Yes, This Flu Season Is Worse Than Usual
Source: Google.org
Or at least earlier than usual. The map above was created by Google.org’s Flu Trends initiative, a non-profit wing of the very much for-profit Google. It tracks search terms which it deems good indicators of flu activity, then uses aggregated Google search data to estimate flu activity. As you can see, the flu is peaking right now, more than a month earlier than average, and at a much more intense rate.
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Hundreds of People Are Trying to Unload Their Personal Seat Licenses at Cowboys Stadium, Including One For the Low, Low Price of $200,000
Prompted by this New York Post story today about unhappy Jets fans selling off their personal seat licenses, I headed to SeasonTicketRights.com to see what the scene was like at Cowboys Stadium. The result: lots of people, trying to sell lots of seats.
Like this one:
Amenities – Best sightlines in the stadium – Roomier, cushioned seats – Access to the Field Level Club – Private, exclusive Founders Club – All-inclusive food & Beverage – Complimentary, reserved VIP parking – Opportunity to purchase seats to all other events – Exclusive invitation to team events Have a friend that would like to sell her seat which is right next to mine. We bought 2 seats as a couple. These seats are a part of the founders club, which means you receive high incentives & benefits. Like 1. your own VIP Parking with your name on it. 2. 4 meals free prior to game and all during game. 3. Free Alcoholic beverages 4. Complimentary on field passes and much more….
That one goes for an asking price of $200,000, plus an additional $113,157.79 in debt. Reminder that this is for one seat, and doesn’t include the actual price of any tickets.
Or this one, which makes the previous one look like a steal, since it’s only $300,000 for eight seats:
We have 8 seats (4) in section C310 Row 4 seats 15-18 & (4) in section C310 Row 5 seats 18-21 asking $37,500 each for seat option. They are on the 50 yard line and are aisle seats. These seats come with Miller Lite access to the team tunnel to see players coming in and off the field. This listing is for season 2013
The Miller Lite tunnel! Huzzah!
I understand the PSL game is a money-making venture for many people. One that can pay off huge. But it’s also fair to say that the number of licenses for sale probably wouldn’t be quite as high if the Cowboys were even making the playoffs.
The Cowboys’ Jumbotron Is 18 Times the Size of the Vikings’ Puny, Hummingbird-Sized ‘Jumbo’tron
Source: Daniel Beaton
The Cowboys currently boast the largest Jumbotron in the NFL, a behemoth that literally can affect the way a game is played. In its grandeur, graphic artist Daniel Beaton saw an opportunity to showcase the boards of the NFL, from the Cowboys all the way down to the Vikings. The above graphic is for comparison’s sake; to see his interpretation of each board, head here.
(h/t The Verge)
Man Straps Tony Romo Jersey to Washing Machine, Blows Up Washing Machine
Direct quote from Neil Maddux, washing machine destroyer: “This is how you wash the sh*t out of a Tony Romo jersey, when you don’t play worth a damn.”
North Texas Weather Is Awful, But You Knew That
_1280″ src=”http://frontburner.dmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/tumblr_mfca6vyrcs1qd9dz2o1_1280-791×1024.jpeg” alt=”" width=”635″ height=”822″ /> Source: Rachel Nelson
The above map is from Rachel Nelson, a master’s student at the University of Virginia. She plotted hail, tornado, hurricane, and earthquake paths across the United States. The takeaway: I really can’t see North Texas on the map, which must mean it’s covered in hail and tornados. Great.
(h/t Rod Dreher, via Fresh Air)