One of my oldest friends is a cat named Darius Holbert. We met on the bus to DISD’s Alex W. Spence Talented and Gifted Academy — a school that also produced Tim Rogers and Robert Wilonsky — and then went on to graduate from Booker T. Washington High School for the Performing and Visual Arts.
Darius is doing far more with his gifts and talents these days than me, Tim, or Robert. The dude’s making a living as a musician in Los Angeles. His current gig is playing with the reunited House of Pain of “Jump Around” fame. Go to the 4:20 mark — heh heh — of this video to see him absolutely abuse his keyboard.
If you’d like to see more of this, House of Pain is playing the South Side Music Hall tonight. The first 10 people to e-mail me at editor@peoplenewspapers.com get a free pair of tickets.
FrontRow is giving away a pair of tickets to tomorrow night’s performance of Horton Foote’s Dividing the Estate at the Wyly Theater. M. Lance Lusk raved about it, and I liked it too.
Click here to enter until 3pm.
Again, our group name is Best Waffles, and we’re right here. If you win, you get a $150 gift card to Ozona, AS WELL AS an almost imperceptible head nod from me, a steely eyed fist pump from the distant film/TV father of your choice, one of the pens off my desk, bragging rights for a year, and — just added! — a post on FrontBurner to say whatever you want, so long as you don’t curse and don’t mind me editing it to reflect my own personal views.
Anyway, get to it.
If you haven’t noticed, we’re giving away tickets to the February 18 performance of Cirque du Soleil, Ovo this week on FrontRow. We have one pair to giveaway today and another tomorrow. Go here.
Can I interest you in some live music? How about some tasty vittles? No? Your interests do not include tapping your foot nor tickling your palate? Then what do you say to some free vodka? Now I gotcha.
On January 27, we’re throwing a party at the Granada to thank you, our dear FrontBurnervians, for your thoughtful contributions and unwavering support of our online efforts. Or, you know, for your expletive-laden, hateful comments that we are forced to moderate. Whichever. In any case, FrontBurner Live will feature performances by Seryn and Telegraph Canyon. Because your ears can’t listen on an empty stomach, we’ll have food for you from several of the restaurants we named the best of 2010. Confirmed so far are: Nova, Brownstone, Urban Taco, and Meddlesome Moth. Because you’ll need something to wash it all down, Kru 82 vodka will be flowing like water — if you’re accustomed to water being about 80 proof and flowing down a chute made of ice.
Let’s see. What else do have planned to delight you? Oh, yes! A big projection screen on which you will be able to comment on a live blog of the evening and have those comments seen by all. And maybe something involving paint ball guns. Not sure about that last part. Working on it.
So how can you attend? We’re inviting a select number of commenters that we’ve come to know and love (or hate) over the years. A certain number of — ahem — prominent Dallasites will receive special invitations. (Big Bob Wilonsky, yours is in the mail!) But we’ve reserved space for others, too. So if you’re not a regular commenter or an enormous bald Jew who favors vests and motorcycle boots, just register after the jump. We’ll do a random(ish) drawing for 100 or so free tickets to the gig. Hope to see you there.
We’re all so busy checking off our Christmas shopping lists and spending our extra time at tacky sweater parties, so why not try to win a little somethin’ somethin’ for yourself?
All you have to do is fill out one measly little survey for us, and you’ve got a chance.
D Magazine — Be About It!
I mentioned yesterday that I thought the Southside Falcons story would make a good movie script. Bunch of poor kids on a Pop Warner football team coached by a pastor. They go undefeated and just need $20,000 to travel to Florida to play in the Pop Warner Super Bowl. The Morning News brings us an update on the story. Southwest Airlines stepped up to provide transportation to and from Florida. And a bunch of generous readers sent in money, too.
Boring! This is a lousy plot twist. See, here’s the way this thing should have unfolded: the star quarterback (again, Jaden Smith is a natural to play the role) is estranged from his father, a mid-level drug dealer who has spent most of the quarterback’s life behind bars. The quarterback, desperate for the $20k his team needs to travel to Florida, sneaks out of his grandmother’s house, where he lives, to pay a late-night visit to his father, who, because he’s desperate to reconnect with his son, agrees to help him raise the funds. There’s only one way to get that much money in a day’s time. They have to hit the stash house of the drug lord that the father works for. The father knows the stunt, if successful, will mark him for death. But he’s okay with that. At least he’ll die loved. Dad tells son he’ll have his money the next day.
At the last minute, though, the son decides he’d rather miss the football tournament in Florida and have an alive father. He sneaks out of school and runs to the drug lord’s stash house to stop his father. But it’s too late. He gets there just in time to see his dad stuffing bundles of cash into a duffle bag in the living room of the stash house. Weapons and drugs are everywhere. The guys who run the stash house lie hog-tied on the floor. The son tries to talk his father out of it, tells him to leave the cash and get out of there. The father says it’s too late. He’s doing it for his son. But in their heated exchange, the father is distracted and doesn’t notice that one of the stash house guys has slipped his ropes and gotten his hands on a pistol. In the ensuing gun battle, the quarterback is shot in the leg. Now they’ve got the money they need to go to Florida, but the kid can’t play. Ah, cruel fates!
In Florida, the team advances through the tournament by relying on a completely reworked offense that the pastor draws up on the long bus ride out there. He’s going with the wishbone! None of the other teams have had to defend against the wishbone! It’s just crazy enough that it might work!
Until the championship game against a powerhouse team of kids from Russia. Or China. Take your pick. But they are enormous kids. And they know how stop the wishbone. After the first half of play, it’s Southside Falcons 0, the Wu-Tang Clan 44. It’s hopeless. In the locker room, the pastor delivers an impassioned speech, but all the kids know it’s useless to try. The Wu-Tang Clan is too good against the wishbone. If only they had their star quarterback …
… who comes limping into the locker room and says he’s ready to suit up! There is much cheering. With blood seeping through his leg bandages, the star quarterback leads the Falcons in an improbable second-half comeback capped off by a flea flicker for an 87-yard gain. The receiver is tackled on the 1-yard line, and with time expiring, the quarterback calls his own number and plows into the end zone for the winning touchdown.
Cut to the Chinese team. They approach the exhausted Falcons quarterback with menacing looks on their faces. Oh no! A post-game melee? No! They line up and bow to the Falcons, a traditional Chinese way of showing respect. Hooray! The Falcons lift their quarterback onto their shoulders and carry him from the field. His father looks on with pride, tears welling in his eyes, knowing that he’ll be murdered if he ever returns to Dallas. He’ll have to light out for Canada to escape the drug lord’s wrath, and he’ll never see his son again. But at least he gave him that championship.
Roll credits.
See, man? That’s how it’s done.
You like homes. You like good architecture. You would like to go on AIA Dallas’ home tour. You’re in luck: you can win free tickets here. Hurry, they’re almost gone.
A walking FrontBurnervian tells us what happened last night at Primo’s:
Derek Holland walked in. We didn’t recognize him. Inside the window, a girl and guy (in a Vlad Guerrero t-shirt) started getting their picture taken with him. Our waitress came out to deliver our drinks and we asked, “Who is that guy?” She said, “Oh, that’s Derek Holland. He just ordered a bottle of champagne for every table.” The rest of my table missed that part somehow, and I kept mum until they started trotting out bottles of Moet two by two and dropping them off at each table, saying, “Courtesy of Derek Holland of the Texas Rangers.” That was pretty much that. No muss, no fuss. Just drinks for strangers.
How cool is that?
Have you memorized my State Fair of Texas guide yet? Great! Then you know that this weeks-long celebration begins today. I hope to see you soon at the lunchtime parade in downtown Dallas.
Tonight
Maybe I was inspired by Sarah Reiss’ piece in the October issue of D Magazine, or maybe I’m just going through a phase, but beer has sounded exceptionally good to me this week. What luck, then, that two of Dallas’ upscale grocers are hosting beer-riffic events this weekend. Tonight is Oyster Bar Night at Whole Foods’ Lakewood store. What it entails: oyster shucking and eating, live music, and beer (Shiner and Pabst will be on hand, but I’m eager to try the Fireman’s #4, a blond ale from the Hill Country). You’ll also be able to sample and buy clams, and prepare them at home. Carla at Whole Foods passed along this simple but drool-worthy recipe.
Meanwhile, Brewtopia has sprouted up on Lovers Lane. Tonight’s celebration includes a Beer Roundup and Magic Hat sampling.
If you time it right, you can probably hit both spots before heading south to Oak Cliff for jazz by Jeff Golub and Eric Darius’ at the Bishop Arts Theater Center. True, this isn’t thrashy, head-bangy music—for that you might need to skip the beer and go hear Slayer, Megadeth, and Anthrax—but these guys are talented musicians, and the venue is perfect for a jazz concert.
Because if you have, you know we are giving away tickets to the Sarah Jaffe homecoming concert this Saturday. And you would have also likely wasted a good hour perusing the Texture of Dallas videos (I know how you feel; I’ve probably watched Dallas DART Dude’s Dealey Plaza narration 30 times). Don’t forget to vote.