This week’s game is for those who seriously want to waste the rest of the afternoon, possibly even this evening, and it’s probably best that tomorrow is the weekend because you’ll still be playing Hanna in a Choppa 2, moving through tunnels, picking up and manipulating objects, until the wee hours tonight. I really don’t see any other possibility.
The Sweet Sixteen is upon
us Arlington. Go La Salle Explorers. Big Five, what. Today’s game is a trivia game: name the top 20 DI men’s basketball teams, for each year from 2000 to 2009. I got 183 out of 200, good enough for the 91st percentile.
Though it didn’t feel like it this morning, spring is here. I know this because my wife’s litany of allergy medications has once again taken over our house, rendering bathroom-counter space nearly extinct. Today’s game is Garden Inventor, which I picked because of its tagline: “Use deadly flowers and angry gnomes to kick some bug ass. Many, many levels to defend. Many bugs to smash.” Sold.
This weekend, everyone’s favorite holiday comes to town: Halloween. So dress up in your best costume and hit the streets, you dummies! Today’s game is a Halloween-related trivia game, where you have to insert missing spooooky Halloweeny words into movie titles. I scored 33 out of 40, good enough for the 98th percentile. Come at me, bro.
In honor of the return of ‘One Riot, One Ranger,’ today’s Fun is an homage to law enforcement. Today’s game is Storm Ops; choose your weapons and shots carefully to defend your base.
Less money, more money, whatever. Let’s play some games and listen to some music. Today’s game is Portal, where you cut into wormholes and defy the laws of time and space. Cut, get it?
Today’s soundtrack, if you don’t like the only version of “The First Cut is the Deepest” that matters: Rick Ross, Lil’ Wayne, Young Jeezy, and Trick Daddy, “Luxury Tax,” Brother Ali, “Letter From the Government,” Q and Not U, “End the Washington Monument (Blinks Goodnight),” Jay-Z, “Politics as Usual“
What a great little run we all had there, telling a grown man where he shouldn’t spend his Sundays. In honor of Mr. Tebow, today’s game is Superstar Football. It’s exactly like it sounds.
For a soundtrack (if you refuse to listen to one of the greatest albums of all-time, above), let’s go with: Bobby Bare, “Dropkick Me Jesus Through The Goalposts of Life;” Patti Smith, “Gloria;” Kenny Starr, “The Blind Man in the Bleachers.”
In honor of that insane, other-worldly occurrence in Russia yesterday (regards to the 500 injured), let’s talk space and meteors. Today’s game is, poetically, The Space Game. “Take an asteroid field and turn it into a space station!”
In honor of Dallas’ burgeoning Chinese community – and our own Carol Shih – today’s Friday Fun is dedicated to the Chinese New Year, celebrated this weekend. Our game is “Red Dragon“:
From fireballs to spitballs and green gobs of goo, this aerial battle is fierce. Take control of this red dragon against airships and enemy dragons alike.
In the summer of 1998, my knees were the size ofÂ cantaloupes, I slept 16 hours a day, and antibiotics forced me to stay out of the sun. I’d contracted Lyme disease, a tick-borne disease that rips through the Northeast during any season that kids play in the woods and forget to check themselves for ticks.
Because of my carelessness, I was laid up on my parents’ family room couch at 4 p.m. every day, for a month. My dad would hook me up to an IV, the drugs would start ripping apart my insides, and I’d flip on The People’s Court. Mayor Ed Koch would greet me and give me a legal education. No, you could not stop paying child support because you fixed your ex-wife’s gutters. In the state of New York, rum is not a valid form of payment for services rendered. You should always fix your hand-railings.
Koch and I would hang out every day for an hour, then presumably he’d go about his business and I would fall asleep. Koch died of heart failure yesterday at the age of 88. Thanks for the memories.
In honor of Koch, today’s game is a Sporcle trivia quiz, entitled “Law in the Movies.“Â It names the character, the actor who played that character, and the year. You name the movie. I got 13 out of 24. Soundtrack for today’s game: Beastie Boys “Car Thief“; Blossom Dearie “My Attorney Bernie“; George Harrison “Sue Me, Sue You Blues“; The Clash “Know Your Rights.”
My car broke down this morning, so you’ll excuse me if this edition of Friday Fun is more anÂ opportunityÂ for me to vent through music. Today’s game is Redline Rumble Revolution, and it lets you drive vehicles that actually work and don’t require bi-annual “Just tell me to get a new car finally” trips to the mechanic.
You should probably just listen to the Springsteen track above on loop, but if that isn’t of interest: Tom Waits “Ol’ 55“; The Cramps “Route 66“; David Bowie “Always Crashing in the Same Car“; or Merle Haggard “Long BlackÂ Limousine.”
It hasn’t snowed in what, like three days? And it’s supposed to be in the sixties this weekend? Let’s all be thankful we live in a city where we can run in shorts for the entire year. Today’s game isÂ Sun Stories, which requires bothÂ dexterityÂ and keyboard skills.
My parents frequent a hardware store in upstate New York named Williams Lumber. It has pretty good prices, is locally owned, and gives out free popcorn. Those are my parents’ three biggest requirements of any store, so Williams pretty much crushes it for them.Â OccasionallyÂ while at Williams — this happens with alarming, stalker-like frequency – they see Mark Linn-Baker, who played Larry “Cozzin Larry” Appleton on Perfect StrangersÂ and, since the mid-nineties, creepy dudes on various Law and Order iterations. They smile, exchangeÂ pleasantries, then go home and call their eldest son and tell them they saw Larry from Perfect Strangers can you believe it what are the odds?
Today’s game is Nothing’s Gonna Stop Me Now, a Perfect Strangers-themed game that implores you to follow your dreams, just like Balki did on his trip from Mypos to Chicago. Soundtrack: Lou Reed’s “Perfect Day,” Titus Andronicus’ “A More Perfect Union,” St. Vincent’s “The Strangers,” Wale’s “The Friends N Strangers.”
It is an indisputable fact that the greatest mascot in college sports is the Saint Joseph’s Hawk. Majestic, well-winged, and slightly molting, the mascot of my college years puts all the rest to shame. (Watch that video and tell me otherwise.) Today’s Friday Fun game is a college mascot quiz, which allowed me that personal tangent. I got 42 out of 47, good enough for the 93rd percentile.
Soundtracking today’s Fun are bands or songs with mascots in the titles: Drive-By Truckers’ “Where The [Arizona State Sun] Devil Don’t Stay,” Neil Young’s “Like a [University of Miami] Hurricane,” or [University of Richmond] Spider Bags’ “Que Viva El Rock and Roll.”
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In honor of my maternal grandmother, a Hanukkah treat. Today’s game is “Hanukkah Candles,” and it’s basically Bejewled, but with Hanukkah candles. It’s very easy; just unhook your eyes, like a Magic Eye poster.
And what better way to celebrate Hanukkah than some Cohen, right?