I’m in mighty #Midland today. Earlier it was about 25 degrees. Whatever happened to global warming?
— Greg Abbott (@GregAbbott_TX) January 16, 2013
(Excuse the headline. Tim was just talking about a Sex, Lies and Videotape headline in another publication, and I wanted something equally dated.)
Mars, man. What an idea. Ditch this lame old planet, set up shop on a whole new one. Destroy that one, then head on to Uranus or something equally funny.
Dallas resident Mina Mukhar wants to make that happen. Well, not him exactly. Scientists, people with big brains. Mukhar is just hoping to be the funding mechanism. He launched the Mars Initiative to help propel the work of aerospace engineer and Mars Society founder Robert Zubrin, who grew tired of the lack of government funding and hung out his own shingle.
 I felt that I had a duty and a sincere obligation to myself and to humanity at large to use my knowledge, that I feel so privileged to have, in an attempt to do something great to remedy this horrific situation — to live a life of true purpose – and to hopefully help to convert my dreams, everyone’s dreams, and everyone’s passion for space and space exploration into a true reality.”
So far, he’s raised $1,727.10, which is probably about enough to buy a couple of those freeze-dried ice cream sandwiches. At least he’s honest. If you’d like to help fund the future of the world, head to the Mars Initiative.
We’ll continue with our programming today as planned.
If the Mayans were right, though, and the world as 21st-century humans knew it has ended, and you found this website in some excursive, from-the-ashes-we-rise world, and you know Englis
h, and you found a fully-charged laptop, and your new society has recreated the internet: please forgive our obsession with Helvetica. It seemed like such a cool idea at the time.
The U.S. House voted Wednesday to remove the word “lunatic” from the Federal Code. It was a move that was a long time coming, one that’s been pushed and supported by the American Psychiatric Association, the American Counseling Association, and the National Association of School Psychologists. In sum: it’s not a great thing to call someone.
“The term ‘lunatic’ derives from the Latin word for moon,” said Texas Republican and Judiciary Committee Chairman Lamar Smith, on the House floor Wednesday. “Before the modern era, it was used to describe a person who suffers from mental disease because of the belief that lunar cycles have an impact on brain function. But as science and medicine have progressed, society has come to understand mental illness with more clarity.”
Click to enlarge and see just how ridiculous this vote was. Source: the U.S. House of Representatives
There was one, completely reasonable dissenting opinion, from Tyler Representative and Tea Party firebrand Louie Gohmert.
“Not only should we not eliminate the word ‘lunatic’ from federal law when the most pressing issue of the day is saving our country from bankruptcy, we should use the word to describe the people who want to continue with business as usual in Washington,” Gohmert said in an e-mail to Bloomberg. Gohmert is also the person who claimed Hamas was sending women to the United States to have “terror babies” who could then come back to the United States and blow up buildings and humans.
I just wish there was a word for someone with that kind of irrational thinking.
One of the biggest strikes against Mitt Romney during the general election was that since he had to skew so far to the right during the Republican primary race it was nearly impossible to brand himself otherwise during the general election. Nowhere was this more evident than immigration. Okay, maybe taxes, health care, and lots of other things, too, but still: immigration.
From Slate’s campaign wrap-up:
Romney campaign manager [Matt] Rhoades said he regretted that Romney had moved so far to the right on immigration during the primaries in order to out-flank Texas Gov. Rick Perry. “In retrospect,” Rhoades said, “I believe we probably could have just beaten Perry with the Social Security hit.”
It wasn’t clear exactly what Rhoades regretted. It might have been simply that he wishes he’d anticipated Perry’s quick implosion. Why have Romney risk doing anything that might hurt him later if the target of the attack was going to collapse so spectacularly anyway? It didn’t seem that Rhoades regretted Romney’s policy positions per se.
This kind of post-coital tristesse is always fun because it reminds us people thought Rick Perry could become the president.
Now that the country has learned about democracy and technology and their combustible love-child known as the White House’s “We The People” petition page, it was only a matter of time before someone asked President Obama to step in and fix the mess at Cowboys Stadium.
Steven M., from Fort Benning, Ga., wrote:
We, the Citizens of the Great State of Texas, and Dallas Cowboys fans worldwide, have been oppressed by an over controlling, delusional, oppressive dictator for way too long. Request the Executive Branch’s immediate assistance in removal of owner and GM, Jerry Jones. His incompetence and ego have not only been an extreme disappointment for way too long, but moreover, it has caused extreme mental and emotional duress.
Some other petitions currently on the site, to prove that this is the real deal:
MSG and/or Monosodium Glutamate is a food additive that has no positive benefits in our food (468 signatures)
Require the National Park Service to allow camping to all self-propelled visitors even if campground is full (692 signatures)
Give us back our incandescent lightbulbs! We, the undersigned, want the freedom to choose our own lightbulbs (975 signatures)
Require zoo’s [sic] to have more secure cages & enclosures keeping animals in & people out of them thus preventing accidents (362 signatures)
Power Balance bracelets “blend the powers of Eastern Philosophy and Western Science with Innovative Technologies to deliver products that improve and enhance people’s lives.” Poor capitalization not withstanding, Mark Cuban has another word for them: scam.
He posted the above video last week, in which he throws all of the NBA-branded bracelets in the trash. In an email to ESPN Dallas, he said he’ll no longer allow them in his locker room.
There are a lot of nuggets in this Reddit thread, but let’s start with his lede:
Date: 12/21/12 That is right boys and girls the last date for humans. After this, everything you know will cease to exist. Its kind of far away but there is a lot of planning to do.
When do you think the world is going to fall apart Friday morning or Friday night? It would work better for us if it fell apart Friday night?
My thought: why not throw a week-long jam? Why stick to one night of hedonism? If the world’s gonna end anyway, why do work/obligations/Christmas shopping matter?
We need to make this a bad ass party. Not every day do you get to celebrate the end of the world. The last end of the world party we had was pretty bad ass but this needs to be better. I have a feeling this end of the world really is the correct end of the world. Think about it.
Agreed. The more bad-ass the better. I’m still with you.
Whenever someone sends me a video with the title “Best UFO Sightings Of October 2012 – Worldwide,” I gotta watch it. Creature of habit. That and we really don’t do all that much in this office, other than watch Best UFO sighting videos.
Arlington residents should be proud, then, that they made this month’s compilation video, which also includes sightings in Crete, someone who consistently misspells ”replay,” and a clip of an alien spacecraft shooting a laser at the sun. All in 5:40 of FREE FOOTAGE.
Happy Tuesday to you, readers. If today is your birthday, you are a Virgo. And if you are a Virgo, this is your horoscope:
It’s a really good time for you to stretch your boundaries and ensure that your people are all making way for you. Your great energy is just right for trying something that is totally new to you [emphasis mine].
What excellent advice! So excellent, in fact, that I recommend even non-Virgos heed it today, by doing the following: