Unless you’re a serious math dork, there’s no reason you’d have ever heard of the Beal Conjecture. The number theory problem looks like this:
If Ax + By = Cz where A, B, C, x, y and z are positive integers and x, y and z are all greater than 2, then A, B and C must have a common prime factor.
Years ago, Andy Beal offered $5,000 to anyone who could prove or offer a counterexample to the equation. Now, Andy Beal you might have heard of. Forbes says the Dallas banker is worth $8.5 billion. He’s also something of a poker nut. We published this profile of him in 2004. Beal is media shy, but our writer just happened to run into Beal at a card table.
Well. Now comes news that Beal has upped the Beal Prize to $1 million. College students, adjust your majors accordingly.
So some bros decide to dress up in costumes, grab a bunch of Turtle Scooters, sneak into the parking garage across the street from Neiman Marcus in downtown Dallas in the middle of the night, and make this video.
I’m pretty sure they’re living the dream.
Fantastic helmet cam video of a house fire in Dallas last week. DFR Engine 5 doing interior attack. fb.me/252mekiPl
— DFW Scanner (@DFWscanner) March 28, 2013
If you don’t do well in IMAX theaters, don’t watch this. But this is the closest most of us will come to fighting a fire, and it’s incredible.
Look at that beautiful 1962 grid. Click and zoom for your neighborhood; mine sure looked a lot prettier then. Via Reddit.
What drove [Matt] Poursoltani to such greatness?
“When I tore my ACL, I didn’t have anything else to do, so I benched every day. I had to do something. It’s all I had,” he said, quietly and without a hint of braggadocio.
Poursoltani played defensive tackle on the Pilot Point Bearcats football team.
“No one moved him,” Coach Jody Allen said.
A gigantic boy among other boys.
My man Zac has become quite the surreptitious snapper of eye-catching perambulators. If you’re out and about and throwing down a look, keep your head on a swivel.
Not that it was every truly in danger of going permanently extinct, but the Twinkie is back. The New York Post broke the news last night about the Irving-based cakery:
[Billionaire private equity mogul Leon] Black’s Apollo Global Management was the only entity to make a bid for the snacks business of bankrupt Hostess Brands – grabbing ownership of the stable of well known brands for $410 million, The Post has learned.
The private equity firm — known for making money off distressed assets — teamed with veteran food exec Dean Metropoulos on the bid for the business, which also includes Ho-Hos, Donettes and Dolly Madison in addition to Twinkies. The deadline for bids was Monday at 5 p.m.
Hostess creditor Silver Point Capital and Hurst Capital in recent days had submitted letters indicating an intention to bid – but in the end neither stepped up to the plate with a firm proposal.
As we all know, Metropoulos also owns Pabst Blue Ribbon. I would never, ever make the assertion that these two treats are a match made in trashy heaven. Reuters caught up with Metropoulos’ son Daren, who said the snack cakes could be back on shelves by the summer.
According to the video (hosted by “professional soccer ball-kicker Stephen Keel”), the FCD 442 Orange Obliteration System is the cure for:
- no hit TV show
- It’s at State Highway 121 and Plano Parkway
- It’s for Nebraska Furniture Mart’s 560,000-square-foot retail showroom and 1.3 million-square-foot distribution center
- Nebraska Furniture Mart will anchor Grandscape, a 3.9 million-square-foot monolith that will probably have the capability to detach from Earth and self-sustain, should the need arise
Last point: the first person to snag a picture of themselves in the chair will win a free year’s subscription to D Magazine. I will pay for it myself, since I can’t imagine our marketing team is too keen on the idea of a contest where I tell folks to trespass. And I don’t mean next to the chair, or one of those photos where your fingers look like they’re smushing the chair. IN IT. Get to snappin, and send the photo to email@example.com.
UPDATE: I assumed an email like this would land in my inbox today. From Jeff Lind, chief strategy and development officer for Nebraska Furniture Mart:
“I’m contacting you because safety is a huge priority for Nebraska Furniture Mart and I believe this could put someone at needless risk of injury. I’m sure it was for fun but I can’t bury my head in the sand when safety is involved. Any action you could take to cancel the ‘contest’ could potentially help avoid an injury. I hope you will consider this course of action and I encourage you to do so. Thank you very much.”
So, contest off. It was fun (?) while it lasted.
JR Poem by
I’ll let the folks at the “Remembering J.R.” Facebook page take over:
March 11 is officially declared as “Larry Hagman Day.” The Mayor of Dallas will declare it and issue a Proclamation declaring it official. The Dallas episode airing that evening is called “J.R.’s Masterpeice” and will be the funeral of J.R. Ewing. It is a very special show where you the fans get to say “goodbye to J.R. and to Larry Hagman”. You will get to go to the “funeral and the wake” and mourn and grieve this incredible man, but most importantly to say your own personal goodbye. Watching this episode is your opportunity to not only remember him, but also to thank Larry for sharing not only his talents with all of us, but his incredible outlook on life. So on March 11 go ahead, get out your Stetson hats and cowboy boots, wear them all day long, and remember, if Larry were here today, his parting words to all of us would be “Don’t Worry, Be Happy, Feel Good.”
In honor of that, fan Scott Carlson wrote the above poem. You may remember Carlson from “A Year With Perot!,” a poem in honor of the Perot Museum opening.
Dallas Police Chief Fires Officers Who Allegedly Planted Drugs During Investigation: Chief David Brown had a busy Friday, firing two officers who are now charged with fabricated and/or tampering with physical evidence and aggravated perjury related to a 2011 drug investigation. The chief also suspended or fired additional officers for drinking and driving, getting into fights with off duty officers, the misuse of city equipment, whipping their children with computer power cords, and, lest we forget, waving around guns in rap videos.
Are Nolan Ryan’s Days With the Rangers Numbered? Late Friday Texas Rangers General Manager Jon Daniels became the team’s president of baseball operations, and Rick George, the Rangers’ COO, became president of business operations. That quiet administrative switcheroo had more than a few commentators wondering if Nolan Ryan will soon leave the team.
Dignitaries On Hand to Lay Van Cliburn to Rest: George W. Bush and Rick Perry were among those who eulogized the late musical legend, and Russian president Vladimir Putin sent a statement that was read during the memorial service at Broadway Baptist Church in Fort Worth.
The group called Ben Fountain’s book “a wise, sharply insightful examination of war, class, and celebrity in America.” I agree. You should read it. It’s also the rare book where the paperback cover (right) is just as good as the hardback.
Actually, take a look at all of these covers. They’re fantastic.
It’s going to be tough to top last month’s winner, “10 most beautiful asses,” but we’ll try. These, remember, are reproduced exactly as they appeared in our analytics:
- TIS CHELSEA HANDLER A HEAVY DRINKER
- 2020 sex movie
- FREE MARGARITAS
- sex boy
- Deep fried jambalaya!!!
- best Yorkie groomer in Dallas
- BIG MANS shoes in Dallas Texas
And the best:
- Doctor Banjo (which actually brings you to Dr. Chaim Banjo, a Mesquite internist)
If we’ve learned anything this month, it’s that we’re all sex-crazed alcoholics who don’t understand the power of CAPS LOCK.
Waste five minutes with this today in honor of Mr. Cliburn, who died this morning.
Arriving in Pyongyang, the American athlete and showman known as “The Worm” became an unlikely ambassador for sports diplomacy at a time of heightened tensions between the U.S. and North Korea. Or maybe not so unlikely: Young leader Kim Jong Un is said to have been a fan of the Chicago Bulls in the 1990s, when Rodman won three championships with the club.
Rodman is joining three members of the Harlem Globetrotters basketball team for a Vice Media production to air on HBO in early April, Vice founder Shane Smith told The Associated Press in an exclusive interview before the group’s departure from Beijing.
Smith said the Americans hope to engage in a little “basketball diplomacy” by running a basketball camp for children and playing pickup games with locals, and by competing alongside top athletes of North Korea – formally known as the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea.
“Is sending the Harlem Globetrotters and Dennis Rodman to the DPRK strange? In a word, yes,” said Smith, who is host of the upcoming series. “But finding common ground on the basketball court is a beautiful thing.”
This is fantastic. I literally can’t think of anything better. Maybe a MS Painted Kim Jong Un wearing Bulls gear? Yes, that will do.