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Zac Crain is a senior editor at D Magazine. He moved to Dallas in 1997, and since then, he's worked as an editor at the Dallas Observer and American Way, written for Esquire and Spin, ran for Dallas mayor, written a book, and served as "glue guy" for a handful of rec-league basketball squads. Scouting report: can't go right, but he's a creative passer, and semi-accurate set shooter.

Leading Off (7/2/15)

Texas AG Ken Paxton Could Face Felony Securities Fraud Case. A special prosecutor is planning to present a first-degree securities fraud case to a Collin County grand jury within the new few weeks. Texas Rangers had been looking into allegations that Paxton had failed to register as an investment advisor with the state. Kent Schaffer, the prosecutor, said he will likely file that case, too, which is a third-degree felony. A first-degree felony conviction is punishable by up to life in prison, but I would sincerely doubt Paxton would get that. Now, if I could stop being Zac Crain the highly respected journalist at America’s No. 1 city magazine and be Zac Crain your gossipy pal, I would say — after Paxton urged county clerks not to issue marriage licenses to gay and lesbian couples, ignoring the SCOTUS ruling — this is how I feel about Paxton’s current sitch.

Tyson Chandler Signs With Phoenix Suns. Chandler — only arguably the best big man in Dallas Mavericks history — didn’t wait around to see if the Mavs were able to sign DeAndre Jordan or not. So now the Mavs really, really need to sign Jordan. Because, as someone pointed out on Twitter yesterday, right now this guy is the Mavs’ starting center.

Dallas County Jail Population At An All-Time Low. Current number of inmates is 5,618, down 600 from this time last year. That means the jail has been able to close six pods — large rooms with bunk beds, a common area, and a direct supervisor — with potential savings of $3.2 million a year. You know why I think the population is so low? Batman.

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Leading Off (6/25/15)

School Board Wants New DISD Superintendent As Soon As Possible. I’d like to dunk a basketball in traffic with two hands but we don’t always get what we want. New board president Eric Cowan said he’d like a new supe by the beginning of the school year. Dan Micciche said he’d like one in four months. Good luck. The piece I linked to also hilariously contains a quote from John Wiley Price regarding public officials not meddling (!). Yes, that John Wiley Price.

NBA Draft Is Tonight. Excited to see what kind of project the Mavs reach for too early and ultimately don’t play/trade quickly! (Seriously, everything about UCLA’s Kevon Looney suggests a slightly taller Draymond Green, so make that happen, Donnie and Cubes.)

Dallas NAACP To Meet About Confederate Landmarks. Arthur Fleming, president of the local chapter of the NAACP, says they will talk about which ones in North Texas they will push to have removed. “If we are going to move forward in America, as Americans, we have to let go of those symbols,” Fleming said. “They can keep the symbols. They can take them to a house or put them in a museum.” On the other hand: Gay Donnell of the Lee Park and Arlington Hall Conservancy, which oversees a large statue of Confederate General Robert E. Lee, says not so fast. “People can learn from it and apply it to race relations today, states’ rights today, local control today. That’s good,” she said. Riiiiight, Gay Donnell. States’ rights.

Sex Offenders Meet In Dallas. Who says we can’t get convention business? ATTABOY, Philip Jones.

“Group Petitioning For Alcohol Election To Make Frisco Completely Wet.” Is the headline to this story.

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Dwaine Caraway Officially Announces Run For County Commissioner

“I went to Mayweather fight and I didn’t get all this,” the man next to me leaned over and said, laughing, as a high school drum line led out the man of the hour, Dwaine Caraway, who represented District 4 on the Dallas City Council until yesterday. There was more to come. After Caraway finished his short announcement that he was officially entering the race for county commissioner — he didn’t prepare a speech, he said, because he was speaking from the heart — a mariachi band in the corner fired up.

Before Caraway was called to the stage, the MC said that he thought “Dwaine should have been a boxer — because he’s had to fight for everything he’s got.” And he’ll have to fight for this: embattled county commissioner John Wiley Price, whose spot Caraway is after, made it clear earlier today he’s not looking to give up so easy.

No one really expected Caraway to stay away from public office for long, so the announcement by “the most trill councilman ever” was not a surprise.

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An Abridged List of Better Names For a Dog Than ‘Story’

Over the weekend, new Morning News editor Mike Wilson finally introduced himself to readers, after a few months in town spent attending Robert Wilonsky’s son’s sporting events. In that piece, Wilson revealed that his dog — breed unidentified — is named Story.

My dude really went and named his dog Story. STORY. Like he rescued it from the Mayborn Conference. Like it has #longform on its collar. Like it divides its time between chasing squirrels and trying to write engaging ledes. Even Mike Mooney probably thinks that’s taking it too far, and he loves dogs and writing more than anyone I know. Mooney, who has a Gay Talese shirt. Story!

Here is a list of better names for a dog than Story:

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Leading Off (6/18/15)

Bill Not As Damaging As Some Feared. The tropical storm depression was supposed to dump as much as a foot of rain on North Texas. But the Tripping Daisy cover band of storms have mostly petered out. (Guess I won’t need my umbrella.) So, it doesn’t look like we are going to have a repeat of May, which was, you know, only the wettest May ever. (Too late, say folks out in Grapevine.)

In fact, says Daniel Huckaby, meteorologist and forecaster with the National Weather Service’s Fort Worth Worth office, “The weekend actually looks pretty good if you’re interested in sunshine and warmer temperatures.”

It’s been a while, says Huckaby, since we’ve seen a tropical storm like Bill in Texas. “There was Hurricane Ike in 2008, but that was end of season, in fall,” he says.

But, the NWS meteorologist notes, “It’s not entirely unusual to see tropical systems in June. In June 2001 there was tropical storm Allison, which caused widespread flooding in the Houston area. So it’s not unheard of, but we certainly don’t see tropical storms every June.

“Most of the time — June, July, August — we’re talking about heat, not rain.” We’ll get right on that, Daniel. But first, an Oak Cliff boy’s got something to say about all this:

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Who Should Star In Dallas Ebola Movie?

Apparently, Bryan Burrough’s Vanity Fair piece on the Dallas Ebola crisis has been optioned for a movie. Naturally, it’s time to speculate on casting. I haven’t had a lot of time to think about this, so this is off the top of my head, but probably insanely insightful and spot-on, as usual. For county commissioner Clay Jenkins, I’d say this photo of the original Alfafa from the Little Rascals gang; we’ll find a voice soon.

Rawlings is actually pretty easy: a Travolta-esque comeback role for the autopilot from Airplane!

Airplane-autopilot

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Leading Off (6/11/15)

Attorneys Speak in McKinney. The lawyer for the now-resigned Eric Casebolt says his client let a rough day on the job get the best of him and that he is “disgusted” by racial implications. No excuse, say attorneys representing Dajerria Becton, the 15-year-old girl Casebolt grabbed by the hair and threw around. They say their client has trouble eating and sleeping. But they haven’t decided to file suit yet.

Arrest in Black Market Butt Injection Death. Jimmy “Alicia” Clarke was booked and released after posting a $45,000 bond. Police are still looking for her partner Denise “Wee Wee” Ross. Since a death during commission of a third-degree felony — such as practicing medicine without a license — is considered murder, that’s what both are being charged with.

City Can’t Get Out Of One Of the Dumbest Contracts It Has Ever Agreed To. But at least they can vote to not renew the deal with Service Line Warranties of America, which bought the rights to use the city of Dallas logo for $450,000 so it can — and this is my term — shake down citizens of Dallas with the implicit approval of the city.

Rangers Waste 10-Strikeout Night By Yovani Gallardo. Didn’t watch but sounds exciting.

Becky Oliver to Retire. The longtime investigative reporter for Fox 4 will call it quits on June 29, and go full-time into real estate. In her spare time, she will still confront people, but now just for fun.

LATE ADD: Ornette Coleman, RIP. The Fort Worth native was 85.

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Leading Off (6/4/15)

Horrific Story In Pleasant Grove. According to police, a 14-year-old girl was raped by a family member. That led to a pregnancy. To forcibly abort the baby, three other relatives, worried about Child Protective Services, beat her over six hours. Then tried to dispose of the stillborn baby using a charcoal grill. If all of that is true — if even most of it is — there is no Hell hot enough.

Palate Cleanser. Here. Here’s another one.

Rick Perry To Kick Off Presidential Bid Today. On the one hand, this makes me nervous, as there is the (very slight, but still) possibility that Perry could actually be elected. On the other hand, I’ve always enjoyed a challenge. Jesus Christ Superfund site, ol’ Ricky P is back!

Council Repeals Plastic Bag Fee. Dwaine Caraway showed exactly how plastic bags affect his district, but the council still voted against him. Oh my gosh, what is everyone going to do with all their nickels? I’m gonna buy a Tesla!

Susan Hawk Fires Three More People. Out: her community relations manager and legislative liaison, an investigator, and a digital forensic examiner. In: zero job security, constant suspicion, and gut-churning volatility.

Joey Gallo Hits Another Home Run. He also struck out three times and the Rangers lost. But I am dangerously close to having to care about baseball again, and I don’t think I’m ready for that. Also, Josh Hamilton is going to miss a few weeks.

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The Truth Is, No One Knows If A Trinity Road Would Flood

We’ve pointed out, at various times on this blog and on last week’s EarBurner podcast (check it out!), that world-weary DMN editorial writer Rodger Jones had gotten pretty smarmy about the rising Trinity. He said, with tons of certainty, that any road built between the levees of the Trinity would not flood.

But he can’t be certain, because no one can be certain, because no one actually knows how high a road down there would be. Jim Schutze has a great piece on this at the former Unfair Park.

UPDATE: That link above won’t take you anywhere anymore. Go here instead to see Schutze’s replacement, where, according to information from the Corps of Engineers, it looks like the road would be underwater. UH-OH.

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