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NONI JUICE IS COMING TO GETCHA

I'd never heard of this Noni business until a FBvian passed along the following note. She visited the Tahitian Noni Cafe in the ground floor of the Mondrian and files this report:

The good news is the food is good. The bad news--well, the place is insane. It's a combination restaurant/gift shop/tourist trap/cult, which you slowly realize as you sit munching pineapple, but only if you're paying attention.

The Noni Cafe is just the bait. It leads in to a larger gift shop, which sells Noni everything. Then you notice the line of uniformed guys at a travel agency-style counter ready to tell you about training camps, healing powers and sales incentives. Walk outside and you can see the special back conference room.

They are closed on Sundays. They don't serve caffeine. Their headquarters are in Provo, Utah. You can learn more here, here, and here.

Tim Rogers · March 13, 2006 09:29 AM