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Attention: Do Not Go Bare-Assed to the Dallas Pride Parade

The Dallas Pride parade is Sunday. As the Huffington Post notes, there is some controversy brewing as we head into this year’s celebration. I’ll let Daniel Cates, the North Texas coordinator for GetEQUAL TX, explain. Here’s what he wrote on his Facebook page:

So the Dallas Tavern Guild has instituted NEW rules for parade participants at this year’s Alan Ross Texas Freedom Parade — more commonly known as Dallas Pride. To make the parade more “family friendly” and to accommodate comfort for the increasing number of attending heterosexuals and corporate sponsorship, participants are being asked to cover up! No bare asses, no breasts (even with pasties) no tight underwear on dancers, nothing too political at all. The “queer” is effectively being erased from our pride celebration in favor of the most polished, heteronormative representation of our community as possible.

As someone who endorses bare asses, breasts (even with pasties), and tight underwear on dancers, I say this is an outrage. Why do you think the number of attending heterosexuals has increased? Because we like seeing bare asses, breasts (even with pasties), and tight underwear on dancers. I call on the LGBT community of North Texas to step it up this weekend. Let it all hang out. As long as you’re hot. That goes without saying. Even though I just said it. No naked ugly people, please.

  • Jim Rossman

    This happened to the Greenville Ave. St. Patrick’s Day parade too…I remember the days of strip club floats with pole dancers.

    We took my parents in the early 2000s and I’ll never forget the sight of my dad getting vodka shot into his mouth by a bikini-clad woman with a squirt gun walking alongside a particularly wild group.

    No more Jello shots tossed from flatbed trailers.
    Corporate sponsors are watering down parades everywhere.

    I’m sad.

  • Tim Rogers

    We published this almost a decade ago. It’s still happening:

    http://www.dmagazine.com/Home/2004/02/01/The_New_Puritanism.aspx

  • CSP

    I didn’t really take anything serious after “heteronormative”.

  • Wylie H Dallas

    I typically view Dallas Pride day as a time to consolidate virtually all my laundry in a single load. Not this year, evidently.

  • VIncent Finch

    I hope to god you didn’t get paid to type this bull shit.

  • VIncent Finch

    What does indecent exposure have to do with Gay Pride.

  • Bobtex

    So, where is the picture of Tim Rogers in a tuxedo jacket, leather chaps, and pasties on his shaved chest? Would THAT be heteronormative enough for the corporate (read: brewery) sponsors?

  • Scott

    So, I’m a little confused. The goal is to make the parade more accessible to families, right? Gay people have families too. This isn’t a phenomenon that’s limited to straight couples. Gay folks adopt and have children through other means. Which means they have children that, perhaps, they want to bring to the parade because it’s about gay pride. But because of the fact they don’t want their kids seeing people genitalia, in the name of pride, they’d like this to be toned down. Seems perfectly reasonable, so I must be missing something.

    Does the request mean that gay folks that want to get married and start families are too “heteronormative” and should stay away from the parade because they’re not queer enough? That’s kind of the impression that I get.

  • Kat Cook

    Okay. I have no problem with the Gay community being asked to make pride more family friendly. Lots of LGBT folks have families, and it helps us seem like part of the wider Dallas community and not freaks on display. Asking us to wear clothes is not hetero-normative, asking us to look and act like only straight people is hetero-normative. There will still be drag queens,dykes on bikes, and rainbows aplently…

  • Tim Rogers

    Listen, if we can get Deep Ellum Brewing or somebody to pony up, we might be able to make this happen.

  • Mike

    If Benny Hill has taught us anything, and i believe that he has, it’s that people will accept a fair amount of risque behavior if accompanied by the timeless sounds of yakkety sax, so there you go, problem solved.

  • Malissa Page

    Dumbest thing I’ve ever heard!

  • Malissa Page

    Great point Scott!

  • Bobtex

    I will need LOTS of their product in order to view this image in the flesh without causing blindness.

  • jbarn

    I think it is time that someone else takes over the handling of the Dallas parade. The same old fogies have been running this thing for years and they are way out of touch. Our parade is in September while the rest of the world celebrates in June. They now charge folks to get into the party at Lee Park at the end of the celebration. And now they are trying to clean it up and sterilize it. In addition, the thing never runs smoothly; you will have literally, 20 minute gaps between “floats”, thereby ruining all the energy and momentum. Houston holds theirs at night, in June, and they get like 10 times more attendees then we do. We need to find out who they have running theirs as apparently they are doing something that we aren’t.