Fox News caught up with W. and asked him some questions about the United States going strong mayor in Syria. See if you can guess which statements below he actually made and which quotes I’ve concocted. Answers here.
On President Obama’s decision matrix:
a) “The president’s got a tough choice to make.”
b) If Obama does take action, “he’ll have the greatest military ever backing him up.”
c) “Me, I like to get my head straight before I have to decide whether to drop bombs on someone. I find that clearing brush works best for that. Then I ask Condi.”
On Syrian President Bashar al-Assad:
a) Bush says he’s “not a fan” of Bashar’s.
b) Bush says Assad has “made mischief.”
c) Bush says, “You just know drugs must be behind this sad mess.”
On Star Trek Into Darkness:
a) “It’s hard for me to believe that Kirk could fix the most important part of the Enterprise, the warp core, by just kicking it back into alignment.”
b) “When Scotty phasers Khan on Admiral Marcus’ Dreadnaught, stunning him, why does he then stop paying attention to Khan — who is, let’s remember, a superhuman — while Kirk argues with Admiral Marcus, thereby giving Khan the opportunity to pop up and go Chuck Norris on everyone?”
c) “As long as we’re talking about Khan, let me see if I understand this correctly. He was frozen 300 years ago, right? But this movie takes place sometime around 2260, which means that Khan was frozen in circa 1960. What’s he gonna know about photon torpedoes and warp drives and all that advanced hooha? That’s just stupid.”