Zac is out today, so I’m filling in. I wanted to try to channel him while presenting today’s items, like do that kind of really entertaining stream of consciousness thing he does so well, where he pulls in random tangents and references–maybe something about how I’m slightly misguided in my assessment of a giraffe’s stomping abilities–but that particular kind of verbosity doesn’t come easy. (One day Tim will let us have a write-like-Zac contest, and the winner will get something pretty special, like getting to hear Zac talk about the vague idea he and I came up with for a remake of Victory, which, I assure you, is amazing.)
Teen From Hurst Police Video Speaks: In a written statement distributed to reporters yesterday at the police station, Andrew Rodriguez, last seen in handcuffs taking a knee to the head and a whole lot of death threatsÂ courtesy of a tax-payer-paid peace officer, says he wasn’t resisting arrest. He also says the drug paraphernalia listed on his arrest report isn’t his.
Grapevine Man Convicted of Animal Cruelty: At first I wondered why a prosecutor would spend the time and resources bringing a felony trial against a man accused of beating his girlfriend’s dog to death. (Alexander Good, 27, says he was carrying the dog and fell on top of it.) But then I began to imagine what would happen if someone did this to my dog, and how cases like this may in fact prevent future felonies.
Mavericks To Sign Derek Fisher: InsertÂ old point guard jokes.