Like anyone remotely connected with a media outlet, yesterday I was sent an email by the PR team for Papa John’s pizza. The email contained a link to the chain’s new commercial (seen above), featuring a rapping Jerry Jones. I struggled with whether to post it here on FB Nation and ultimately decided I didn’t want to just promote a commercial that is not nearly as entertaining as it would like to be.
But then I got to thinking about some other news from yesterday, that Dallas Cowboys wide receiver Dez Bryant is apparently subject toÂ a set of behavioral rules imposed by the team. (Though Jones says there aren’t any special rules.) Bryant apparently now has a midnight curfew, can’t go to strip clubs, etc.
That information, and Jerry’s latest pizza-pushing, got me thinking that it might be time for us, the Dallas-Fort Worth public, to impose some special rules of our own upon the Dallas Cowboys owner:
Ron Johnson’s popping up everywhere lately, from the Piers Morgan show on CNN to this great Q&A with Bloomberg BusinessWeek. And, you can’t say the CEO of Plano-based J.C. Penney isn’t thinking big. In the magazine interview, he even compares making over Penney’s to rebuilding “trust” in American institutions. Johnson also tells how he thinks wider aisles, all-new mannequins (55,000 of them!) and “retraining” the customer will help save the venerable department store.
I know this fellow. I can’t tell you much about him, because he wishes to remain anonymous. But a couple weeks back, I was having a beer with him, wearing the tuxedo (natch), and this fellow hit on an idea.
“I’ll pay you $100 to mow my lawn in the tux,” he said.
“Done!” I replied and offered to shake on it before he could back down.
That was my first mistake. Never settle for the first offer. I’m certain I left $50 on the table. Maybe twice that amount. Because this fellow is the sort that has no idea what a lawn mowing is worth. Similarly, I am confident that he doesn’t know what a gallon of milk costs. This fellow is so far removed from the maintenance of his own property that he doesn’t even own a lawn mower. Which is why he said I’d have to bring mine.
TMZ is reporting that the former Mrs. Aikman was busted in Collin County. The picture is starting to come into focus.
“Frederick Daughtry, first-grade student at Amelia Earhart Elementary, leaves school after the first day of Dallas school integration,” 1961.
An alert FrontBurnervian points us to the Kickstarter page for Aaron and Erik Melander. Aaron lives in Minneapolis, and Erik lives in Dallas. They’ve come up with something called the Supr Slim Wallet, and they have seven days to reach their fundraising goal of $10,000 to make the project go. Except 4,939 people have already pledged $160,182. Pretty solid.
Here’s a question. Besides Andrew Lloyd Webber and his ill-advised attempt at Phantom of the Opera II, has anyone made a direct sequel to a play or a musical? I ask because the Dallas Summer Musicals just released their upcoming season, and Sister Act, A Divine Musical Comedy is on there. Will we ever get a stage version of Sister Act 2? Seems unlikely, but I mean, I think we’d all like to see Cats 2: More Cats.
Tonight, though, something that has no sequel. Stanley Kubrick’s Full Metal Jacket is screening at the Magnolia as part of FrontRow’s Big Movie series. And since me saying that I’ve actually never seen this movie was met with gasps of horror this morning, I might as well tell you guys, too. But tonight seems like the best time to do it, since Carol Shih told me that not having seen this movie is like “not having seen Star Wars.” I disagree, but I also digress. Weather.com told me things could get thunderstormy later, and plus, I have a fondness for the Mambo Taxis that can be found both directly across the street on two sides.
Also this evening, the legendary B.B. King plays at the Verizon Theatre out in Grand Prairie with Tedeschi Trucks Band. It’s far, I know, but not too far to go for a guitarist like King.Â The man is 86, and he’s still touring. It’s pretty amazing. I took a tour of the Gibson Guitar Factory in Memphis a long time ago. I remember seeing a bunch of naked Lucilles, which was interesting. This will probably be better, and you can still get tickets.
For more to do tonight, go here.
Should We Rename Garland Road? That’s the question (paywall) being floated by Lincoln Property, the folks redeveloping the 15-acre spot at Garland and Gaston. Lincoln claims that some people get confused and think the road is in Garland. A company rep downplays the whole thing but says, oh, maybe Arboretum Boulevard would be a good option. I look forward to the point at which this discussion becomes racially charged and the movement gains strength to rename it Julio Iglesias Street. (Bonus: the story I linked to was written by James Ragland. Remember him?)
Van Cliburn Diagnosed With Bone Cancer. The 78-year-old pianist is resting comfortably, but the news certainly isn’t good.
We’re Not Done Yet With the Aerial Spraying. Lewisville and Southlake have given the thumbs-up, and now Irving, after a little miscommunication, is also ready to get doused with Duet from the air. Whatever you do, if you’re about to be sprayed, don’t read this.