Mayor Mike on Toll Road: I’m Forgainst It

After coming out pretty strongly pro-tollroad a few weeks ago — after going on Facebook to solicit feedback he read about as closely as I do terms of service agreements – now Mayor Rawlings is like, hold up, wait a minute. Kind of confusing. Let me clear that up.

Original position: "You know, I'm not sure what I think about the tollroad. What do YOU guys think?"
Original position: "You know, I'm not sure what I think about the tollroad. What do YOU guys think? Also, anyone got any spare Farmville credits?"
Secret second position: "Wait -- that many people are against it? Innnnnteresting. Hey Frank -- can we delete this post without anyone noticing? No. Well what *do* I pay you for? Yes, I know handling requests from Wilonsky is a full-time job. Fine."
Secret second position: "Wait -- that many people are against it? Innnnnteresting. What? Well, when did I decide I was for it? I always have? Why did we bother with the whole Facebook thing? Hey Frank -- can we delete this post without anyone noticing? No. Well what *do* I pay you for? Yes, I know handling requests from Wilonsky is a full-time job. Fine. What? Yes -- meat lover's, of course."
Real second position: "We can all agree that traffic is bad and a very select few of us can agree, kind of, that this road will save us all! Who wants pizza?"
Actual second position: "We can all agree that traffic is very bad and a very select few of us can agree, kind of, that this road will save us all, maybe. Right? Right? COME ON. Who wants pizza?"
Current position: "Well, why didn't you tell me that before I made the dang speech, huh? Scott? Angela? ARE YOU GUYS NOT ON FACEBOOK OR WHAT? Jeez."
Current position: "Well, why didn't you tell me that before I made the dang speech, huh? Scott? Angela? ARE YOU GUYS NOT ON FACEBOOK OR WHAT? Jeez."

10 comments on “Mayor Mike on Toll Road: I’m Forgainst It

  1. Mayor Mike, if you’re reading this —

    I have never seen pictures of you anywhere but on this blog (this is almost certainly true for thousands of people both locally and internationally), and my family and I will be praying to the Lord to send you relief from your flatulence.

    I know many others who are close to the Lord, and when I showed them these pictures (they of course had heard of you but had never really seen pictures, and now they will forever associate you with gastrointestinal anguish; don’t feel bad, I have a second cousin who, at 42, is still associated with the unmentionably located warts that pained him so as a juvenile), and they will praying for you, as well.

    Stay strong, Mayor — and remember, you have nothing to be embarrassed about! When our prayers are answered, as I am confident they will be, I hope you remember to thank Zac Crain for being such a compassionate advocate. After all, it’s thanks to him that prayer groups are forming all over our city “for the flatulence of Mayor Mike.” And dare I add Citizen Mike, too!

    Yours,

    Daniel

  2. He says his goal is to make Dallas the most liveable place. Well… is adding to the freeway network really how you make a place more liveable? Isn’t the urban freeway what killed inner cities?

    Use that money, to make some updates to the current freeway system. Add bike lanes, street cars, streetscapes to the city infrastructure, make Dart more important of a transit option. Relax zoning to make urban development more encouraged (rid the city of those ancient parking space/square ft requirements). And you will have more organic growth and people will live, work and play in areas where they don’t need to jump on a freeway to get there.

  3. I’ll wager he’s in cohoots with ex-Mayor “Big hands”. Probably wants Lepperts construction company to build it…..Can we please have amayor who actually reads what the Corps of Engineers have written? Or are we to llumbered with the tollroad version of a city owned hotel?