Articles for June, 2011
Can We Talk About Parades Now?
I am hearing now that parade details will be announced tomorrow, and the actual parade (which Mark Cuban said he’d spring for) will happen late this week. Can I put a vote in for Friday? Because really, does anybody do anything resembling work on Friday after 10 a.m.?
No. They do not. They begin planning which patio and which beer they will drink. So let’s just agree that Friday at 10 a.m. would be a great time to have a parade, and then go to that parade, and then just go have beers. For the rest of the day.
Governor of Ohio Adopts Mavericks
An alert FrontBurnervian points us to the news that the governor of Ohio, John Kasich, has issued an official proclamation making the Mavericks honorary Ohioans. I like the cut of that Kasich’s jib.
Fans Invade Mavericks’ Personal Space
Check out how celebrating Mavericks fans decorated the homes of Dirk Nowitzki and Don Carter. Dirk got the better end of the deal.
‘Dirk Doesn’t Think Outside the Box. He Eats the Box!’
Thanks to our web guru Randy for passing along this video by the same German madman genius who gave us this brilliant Dirk song. This video is Flula’s treatise on why Dirk is great (hint it has to do with a triceratops, Sauron, Moses, aliens and more. Or, to quote Flula, “He make a English to you. And then he dunks on you!” Enjoy.
Things To Do In Dallas Tonight: June 13
Be proud. You live in a winning city. Personally, I celebrated by sending a barrage of gloating text messages to friends in New York. I received this semi-accurate assessment in return: “You are a bangwagoner.” I think she meant bandwagoner. But you know, bangwagoner works too, especially since there were some illegal fireworks happening in Deep Ellum last night. And of course, I have no idea who might have been shooting those off. None. Seriously, does anyone else feel like they’re starring in a non-ironic YouTube video for “Shiny Happy People?”
Anyway. If you’re looking to get your dignified revelry on this evening, the Meddlesome Moth is hosting a dinner featuring ales from Avery Brewing in Boulder. I did some research, and I’m delighted to announce that I can definitely get behind any company that names a series of beers after various dictators. Five courses, two mini-pours per course, and this time around, they’re including a post-dinner beer in the price. It’s nearly sold out, but I heard this morning that there are “six to eight” spots left. Is this some sort of airplane seating situation? I kid. But hurry up, lest it be six and you’re the eighth person to call.
Joy Division fans, this suggestion is for you. If you do not like Joy Division, you will not enjoy the She Wants Revenge/Nico Vega concert tonight at the Loft. But they are derivative in a way that can sometimes be delightful, and might make for a good way to dance all this Finals tension out. You could also take the opportunity to pop in to Cedars Social, though don’t let the waitress make feel guilty for wanting more than two seconds to look at their four-page cocktail menu. I vaguely remember describing it to the friend who was on his way to meet me there as the “unmarked place on the left with the double Satanic cult-looking doors.” But their drinks did a good job of living up to my wildly pretentious speakeasy standards, so I was pleased.
For more things to do in your city of NBA champions, go here.
Jennifer Aniston Will Destroy Us All
The view from D Magazine's 21st-floor kitchen
This ad on the side of a West End parking garage gives me visions of a giant, topless Jennifer Aniston, rampaging through our fair city like Godzilla through Tokyo. … This will not be a productive day.
I Love These Guys: the Dallas Mavericks, Your 2010-11 NBA Champions
I was fortunate, then very unfortunate, to attend the only other NBA Finals Game 6 the Dallas Mavericks had ever played. Back in 2006, I had half-season tickets — Section 319, Row E, Seats 10 & 11 — and so I had tickets to every other home game in the playoffs. So I was there. I saw Dwyane Wade throw the ball up toward the rafters, after the final rebound of the series. I saw Antoine Walker run out onto the court, the Mavs’ court, and taunt the crowd. That was worse than just about anything. Walker was little more than a human bobblehead during his season with the Mavericks, with decent-looking rebound stats only because of his propensity to miss easy layups. Seeing him celebrate here was — you know what? In the past. All over. Five years later, Dirk Nowitzki and Jason Terry and everyone else conspired to delete that from my memory for good.
Macy’s Congratulates Miami Heat on NBA Championship
Great Macy’s ad in the Miami Herald. Giggle.
Poor Party Planning at AAC
Last night after your Dallas Mavericks won the NBA Championship, fans were in the mood to celebrate. Understandably. A few thousand people wound up in Victory Plaza — excuse me, AT&T Victory Plaza — where Channel 8 was broadcasting live. The TV cameras and the big video boards in the plaza drew revelers like a porch light attracts moths. Which is exactly as it should be. So, of course the cops showed up on horseback to shut down the celebration — the celebration taking place in VICTORY PLAZA.
Seriously?
Star-Telegram columnist Bud Kennedy tweeted last night: “Difference in Dallas and Fort Worth: When a huge crowd gathers in Dallas they send more cops. In Fort Worth they send more beer vendors.”
Someone needs to tell the cops now that there will be a parade so that they don’t try to shut it down early, before it reaches its destination.
Leading Off (6/13/11)
Mavs Win: The lede:
The thumping, bumping, smoke-filled revelry that began 49 weeks ago, sweeping up South Beach in championship fever and transforming the Miami Heat into the most polarizing force in sports, ended in stunned silence Sunday night, in the same place where it all began.
Okay, So Now You Can Plan That Parade: And Cuban is paying for it.
Dirk Hides the Tears: My favorite moment of this whole thing, Dirk running off court at the buzzer to cry alone:
I could already feel the tears coming,” Nowitzki said in an AmericanAirlines Arena hallway, beaming now as he explained the mad dash at the final buzzer that superseded any urge he felt to dance on the court inside this house of old horrors … or to find out how it feels to get a congratulatory man-hug from Dwyane Wade.
“I had to recover, bro.”
Fans Celebrate: 18,000 watched the Mavs win the NBA championship at the American Airlines Center, and when it was all over, downtown was crammed with revelers (and police).
One of the All Time Greats: Undeniable.
The Youth Beat Age (Sort Of): Is it me or does this “Huber on the Finals” commentary on the NBA’s season feel like it was scripted for a Heat win and revised to incorporate the Mavericks?
Read it and Weep: From the Miami Herald: LeBron wasn’t LeBron. Heat Didn’t do enough. Nowitzki valuable when it counts.
Let’s Go, Mavs! Let’s Go, Mavs! Let’s Go, Mavs!
Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs! Let’s go, Mavs!
Michael Irvin: Dallas Will Be NBA Champs
Michael Irvin
Radio host and NFL Hall of Famer Michael Irvin, who spends time in both Dallas and Miami these days, is predicting the Mavs will extinguish the Heat to win the NBA Finals.
“Dallas has taken too much out of” Miami, the ex-Cowboys wide receiver said here last night. “They’ve worn them out.”
The Heat’s had two days to rest and will be playing at home so they might win Game 6, Irvin said, adding, “But Dallas should win the next one.”
Great Mavs Video for Your Eyes
Stop what you’re doing and watch this right now.
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