Articles for May 9th, 2011
New Blimp Port in Midlothian
Look, I don’t own a blimp. But if I did own a blimp, and if I needed to get some maintenance done on it, or if, say, I needed a place to store that blimp, I’d have second thoughts about entrusting my blimp to the people responsible for this website. The new Texas Blimp Port might provide fine blimp maintenance services, but they do not know website design. GeoCities, is what it looks like to me.
Why Zac Crain Is Awesome
Google “Western Conference Finals” right now. Okay, I’ll do it for you.
C&W’s Blake Shelton, Feeling the Heat
The irreverent, good-ol’-boy joking of country star Blake Shelton has landed the Ada, Okla., native on the hot seat, especially lately. The straight-shooting singer, who appeared at a fund-raiser for Dallas Summer Musicals over the weekend, has become the target of PETA and LGBT groups alike for his controversial tweets. The animal-rights outfit didn’t like Blake’s messages about bow-hunting, it seems. The gay groups have objected to a number of his comments.
After C&W singer Chely Wright came out of the closet, for example, Shelton said he was officially coming out as a lesbian, too. (He thinks she’s hot; get it?). He made a quip on TV about Jake Gyllenhaal’s role in Brokeback Mountain, and his most recent tweets parodying a Shania Twain song led to a major brouhaha last week that attracted the attention of the Huffington Post.
“Man, anything I say these days, they’ll pounce on me,” Shelton (pictured in photo by Jeanne Prejean) said with a laugh in Dallas Saturday, before an aide cut off any further comments. The hit-making singer’s an especially hot property these days because he’s a regular on NBC’s The Voice show. He’s also set to marry country queen Miranda Lambert in a hush-hush ceremony somewhere in Texas on May 14.
Canada, We Have a Problem.
Dear ruthless Haynes and Boone lawyers, please point your cease-and-desist cannon at Breck Demers, the very cordial Canadian I just spoke to who nonetheless is purloining our material for his One Stop Newsstand site.
Yellow Smoke Billows From Bowels of Downtown Dallas
From our window, we can see yellow smoke billowing from a manhole at Ross and Pearl. Jason Heid took this picture and reports: “Cop here doesn’t know what it is. City workers, Oncor workers, police, fire on scene.” The Dallas Fire-Rescue website that lists active calls says just “HAZARDOUS MATERIALS.” I’m no chemist, but yellow means sulfur. So, um, downtown is farting? Gross.
UPDATE: From Dallas Fire-Rescue:
The yellow/green smoke is coming from a blown switch in an underground transformer. The color of the smoke is most likely due to burning copper. The fire is out and TXU (or whoever the utility company responsible is) is on location and we are on stand-by.
Dallas Morning News Goes on Another Fishing Trip at Parkland
I’ve written in this space before (and again here) about how the Dallas Morning News covers Parkland and UT Southwestern. Short version: I think the paper and the hospital have gotten to the point where, if they were a husband and wife, it would be best for everyone concerned if they’d go ahead and file for divorce. The paper performs its watchdog role a bit, oh, shall we say, aggressively. The hospital takes a defensive stance. The more (understandably) defensive the hospital becomes, the more aggressive the paper gets. It’s a downward spiral.
Now, apparently, D Magazine is caught in that downward spiral, I presume because of what I’ve written on FrontBurner. On May 5, the DMN filed an open records request with Parkland. You can read the entire thing after the jump. But here’s what they’re asking for: “Any e-mails, notes or memos since Jan. 1, 2010, including the following keywords: Miles Moffeit, Ryan McNeill, Daniel Lathrop, Sue Goetinck, Sue Ambrose, Sue Goetinck Ambrose, Brooks Egerton, Reese Dunklin, The Dallas Morning News, DMN, D Magazine, Bob Mong, Jim Moroney, George Rodrigue, Maud Beelman, Sherry Jacobson, Morning News, The News, Andy Stern, Sunwest Communications, David Margulies, The Margulies Communications Group, Tim Rogers, Wick Allison, Texas Public Information Act, TPIA or open records.”
Andy Stern runs Sunwest Communications, a PR firm under contract with Parkland. Margulies Communications used to do PR for Parkland. All the other names belong to DMN people. Seems pretty clear that the paper has concocted a conspiracy theory that involves D Magazine working with Parkland’s PR firm(s) to defend the hospital.
Well, I can save the paper some work. Andy Stern and I are, in fact, conspiring. We’re conspiring so hard that we’re actually playing golf together this Friday out at the Four Seasons. Stern owns a whole closet full of red pants that he gets to wear every year for the HP Byron Nelson Championship. Me, out of deference to Stern, I wear red shorts to the media tourney every year. That’s why we’re playing Friday. And you know what we’re going to do (besides win the media tourney)? We’re going to talk about Miles Moffeit, Ryan McNeill, Daniel Lathrop, Sue Goetinck, Brooks Egerton, Reese Dunklin, Bob Mong, Jim Moroney, George Rodrigue, Maud Beelman, Sherry Jacobson, and the Dallas Morning News. Then we’re going to talk about the DMN. Then we’re going to talk about the Morning News. And then, simply, the News.
The last topic, you’ll notice, wasn’t covered by their open-records request. Bwwaaa-HA-haahahahhaa! [rubbing hands together conspiratorially]
Update (1:09): Upon close inspection, I see that they have requested info pertaining to “the News.” Curse you and your thoroughness, Ryan McNeill, computer-assisted reporting editor! Fine, though. Stern and I will just have to discuss “the MN.”
Things To Do in Dallas Tonight: May 9
I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend, full of gloating, being nice to your mother, and nerdy things like this Times sports correction. It made my Lord of the Rings-loving heart go pitter-pat.
The road goes ever on and on. I don’t know about you guys, but I enjoy a good ghost story. Theatre Too (Theatre Three’s black box) opens Language of Angels tonight, a newish play by Naomi Iizuka. Iizuka, half Japanese and half Latina (David Brooks would love this lady), draws from traditional Japanese drama to unravel the mystery behind a young woman’s disappearance in an Appalachian cave. I’ve taken the liberty of peeking at the script, and it’s talky, but not extremely long.
Normally I’d link you to a review, but since I’m sending you to opening night, I can’t do that. Personally, I love seeing a show before all the critics chew it up. Forming your own opinions is good. But beware. Theatre Two has two temperatures: Saharan desert, and Artic Ice Storm. Just ask your usher for a blanket— they keep a bunch down there just for that reason. Dream Cafe around the corner for dinner? Don’t mind if I do. The popover that came with my salad a few weeks ago could give Neiman Marcus a run for their money.
And if you’re a fan of Cool Out Mondays, the Granada is giving our local DJs one night of competition with a set from up-and-coming UK dubstep producer Rusko (accompanied by Doory, A1EX and Left/Right) (UPDATE: Rusko show just sold out.). Go forth. Do the awkward beer in hand head bob. Celebrate.
And for more things to do tonight, go here.
IM Just Saying: An Interview With Brad Benites, Creator of didthelakersgetswept.com
I think we can all agree that one of the most genius things in the history of the internet is the website that went up last night called didthelakersgetswept.com. I’ll wait for you to follow the link. Done? Okay, now let’s dive in for a quick Q&A with the site’s creator, Brad Benites:
(more…)
Scoops Callahan Ends Phil Jackson’s Career — Amen, Ctd.
If you want a real giggle at some rampant righteous indignation to Scoops Callahan’s antics, I suggest you go to your Internets, type in the Twitters, and grab Buffalo News Sabres beat writer Mike Harrington’s feed.
Because if there was ever a prime case of pantiesinatwistitis, Harrington got it last night because of Scoop’s question.
Natinsky “Knows Nothing” About Anti-Rawlings Mailer
A Houston outfit called Conservative Republicans of Texas sent Dallas voters this hit piece, er, campaign mailer, ripping mayoral candidate Mike Rawlings for being a big-spending, tax-hiking, liberal Democrat in sheep’s clothing who supports Barack Obama, Harry Reid and Al Franken. Buttonholed about the mailer at a Dallas Summer Musicals fundraiser Saturday night, mayoral candidate–and proud Republican–Ron Natinsky smiled and said, “I know nothing!”
Asked for his take on the campaign so far, Natinsky–who was working the high-rollers at the DSM bash very hard–said the more people have seen David Kunkle in person, the more Kunkle’s support has eroded. He said Rawlings is not getting the bang for the big bucks he’s spending, so Rawlings has stepped up his attacks on Natinsky as well as Kunkle, at times with a subtly racial spin. Natinksy’s prediction for Saturday’s vote: turnout will be extremely low–and he’ll wind up in a runoff with Kunkle.
One personal observation: in person Natinsky is light-years more charismatic, affable and savvy than he’s come across at mayoral forums and in his TV ads. So the question arises: has he really gotten his money’s worth from political spinmeister Carol Reed?
Time-Traveling George W. Bush Led to Death of Osama Bin Laden
The Daily Kos has the astonishing tale of why the infamous “Mission Accomplished” banner was more accurate than we could have known.
Now: let’s all argue about the merits of torture in the comments, shall we?
University of Texas at Austin Scientists Create Schizophrenic Computer
So UT-Austin scientists have a computer with a neural network, nicknamed DISCERN. That sentence should send chills (of excitement and absolute terror) down your spine.
These scientists decided, for kicks I guess, to see if they could get their little electronic monster to suffer the symptoms of schizophrenia. According to this Forbes blog post:
What they discovered is that, like the schizophrenics, the DISCERN program had trouble remembering which story it was talking about, and got elements of the different stories confused with each other. The DISCERN program also showed other symptoms of schizophrenia, such as switching back and forth between third and first person, abruptly changing sentences, and just providing jumbled responses.
Have they cracked the code of determining why Skynet will turn against us?
Still Waiting for Richie Whitt To Eat Crow
From Richie Whitt’s April 28 column in the Dallas Observer, titled “Those Some Old Mav-Wrecks”:
I came away from Dallas blowing a 23-point lead to the Blazers in Portland with this: The Mavs will win this first-round series. But it hardly matters, because they’ve already lost something more important — the respect, credibility and the unyielding support of their fans.
After watching the Mavs grow lethargic, settle for jump shots, let Portland’s Brandon Roy steal their lunch money and puke up the second-largest playoff lead in 57 years, Mavs fans are ready to tap out. And you can hardly blame them. Better to check out emotionally before America laughs at Dallas again for soiling itself under the weight of another embarrassing exit.
Giggle.
Looking Ahead to the Western Conference Finals
First, let’s check something: did the Lakers get swept? OK, good. Just making sure. Who, then, are the Mavs going to face in the Western Conference Finals? There isn’t a website for that — not one I can share with you, at any rate [I've already said too much] — so let’s look at both possible teams: the Memphis Grizzlies and the Oklahoma City Thunder.
(Fair warning: there are a lot of words after this point. If you don’t have time, just look at this for a moment.)
Scoops Callahan Ends Phil Jackson’s Career — Amen
Scoops Callahan, aka 1920s Reporter Guy, is a character played by Tom Gribble, a producer on The Ticket. He invades post-game press conferences, addresses coaches and athletes as “Champ,” and nervously poses questions filled with phrases such as “the bee’s knees” and “the cat’s pajamas.”
One such question was the final question of Phil Jackson’s final post-game press conference. Ashton Kutcher informed his 8 million Twitter followers that it was the “only good thing” about the Mavericks’ blowout win over the Lakers.
Home |
Masthead |
News from D |
About Us |
Contact Us |
Subscribe |
Advertise |
Privacy Policy |
Customer Service |
Awards | Archives | Reprints | d custom | Jobs | Advertiser's Index
Awards | Archives | Reprints | d custom | Jobs | Advertiser's Index