Articles for March 31st, 2011
PETA Urges “Club” After Benbrook Chicken Sacrifice
Out at Western Hills High School in Benbrook, a couple of baseball players were kicked off the team and disciplined after allegedly “sacrificing” chickens in order to bolster the squad’s performance. (The team’s record is 7-15.) Now PETA’s jumped into the act, calling on the school to form an “animals rights club” in response.
Gotta admire PETA’s ability to pounce quickly on a hot topic. But, an “animal rights club”? No sane person condones offing chickens in the name of some silly superstition. And, these guys have already been punished. Plus, how many millions of us are “guilty” of wolfing down slaughtered chicken parts every day? Doubt if the dead birds know or care about the distinction.
Cliff Lee and His Stupid Phillies On SI Cover
Dear Cliff Lee:
Hahahaha. I don’t mean to sound bitter after you rejected us, but seriously, ha! I was all ready to just boo you and cast strongly worded, disparaging remarks in your general direction, but you punished yourself.
You and your Phillies pitching buddies are on the cover of this week’s Sports Illustrated. Everybody knows there’s a curse involved with being on the cover of Sports Illustrated. This never would’ve happened if you had chosen the Rangers. There’s nothing really noteworthy about a team signing an ace pitcher. Signing twelvety-hundred of them, though? Noteworthy. Noteworthy enough to get you on the cover of Sports Illustrated, where, as I mentioned before, there is a curse attached.
So you enjoy your so-called better weather and stuff, but remember that this curse probably means your arm is going to fall off or you’ll get a raging case of hemorroids and will never be able to sit comfortably in the team plane again. And when this bad stuff happens, you remember that this never would’ve happened if you had just chosen the Rangers.
Yours truly,
Me
A Note About the White Rock Lake Dog Park (Or: Why Some People Suck)
Is there anything worse than people who bore you with stories about their children and pets? The answer is no. There is nothing worse than people who bore you with stories about their children and pets.
Let me tell you a story about my dog. Her name is Katie Dog (pictured). She’s maybe 7 months old. We’re not sure because she’s a rescue mutt. Yesterday my wife took her up to the White Rock Lake Dog Park to stretch her legs. Bad things happened. Tears were shed. I’ll actually let my wife tell you the story. Here’s the email she sent me toward the end of the day yesterday:
It’s a nice day, Katie can’t run in our yard [ed: don't ask], and it was 3 pm. I figured it would be a good, safe time to let her blow off some steam at the White Rock Dog Park.
Within minutes of entering, five dogs came to greet her. Normal.
Then, one part-pit-bull-looking dog got aggressive. Rammed her into the fence once. Twice. Heard her wimper and yelp. Other dogs started joining in. The pit bull dog was mean, relentlessly pushing her, nipping at her. I ran across the field, screamed no, inserted myself as a barrier, pushed him with my foot several times, yanked him off Katie by his collar and screamed, “WHO’S DOG IS THIS????” I started kicking at the dog.
Things to Do in Dallas Tonight: March 31
Oh hello, sunshine, nice to see you. Just in time for the big, honking celebration of one of my very favorite things: movies.
Yes, the Dallas International Film Festival kicks off this evening with an opening night event and centerpiece screening at the Winspear. Actress Ann-Marget and DIFF founder Liener Temerlin will be honored for their contributions to the medium, and then Being Elmo: A Puppeteer’s Journey, a documentary on the life and creative work of Kevin Clash, the man behind the Sesame Street character Elmo, takes center stage. Which actually brings me to some sad news: Elmo has had to cancel his in-person (in-puppet?) appearance due to a “scheduling conflict.” Instead, he’ll take part in a live webcast.
However, there’s also good news. There are still a few tickets left for tonight, and you can get yours through the AT&T PAC box office (but you have to call, tickets are no longer available online), the DIFF website, or at the Dallas Film Society’s box office in Mockingbird Station. The $15o pass gets you in to both the opening night event and the fancy after party at the Crow Collection — it’s not just better seats. Plus, don’t forget to check out Peter Simek’s picks for the rest of the festival. I’d advise snagging tickets to those screenings as far in advance as possible, since most of the films get only one showtime and seating is limited.
For more things to do in Dallas tonight, go here.
What In Heck Happened to David Brooks?
OK. So after reading the DMN’s Sunday Q&A with him and Liz’s interesting interview yesterday and after attending his DMA Arts & Letters Live talk in Dallas last night, I’m still not sure what the hell David Brooks is talking about with his new book, The Social Animal. The conservative scribe, described by one Dallas CEO as “the only New York Times columnist I can read without throwing up afterward,” was characteristically smart and modest and funny and insightful, for awhile. But then, he started talking up this new book that apparently describes new research on our emotions and our “unconscious” minds, and how it has the potential to change U.S. politics for the better. At least, I think that was his point.
Brooks rocketed to fame with 2000’s Bobos in Paradise, a hilarious and prescient look at America’s new bourgeois-bohemian elite. And last night, in a prelude to the Social Animal discussion, he was at his old best scattershooting at the Bobos: How, for example, it’s OK for them to drive a “luxury” car like a Volvo or a Saab–”so long as it’s from a country that’s hostile to U.S. foreign policy.” Then, unfortunately, he launched into this long discussion of some woman named Erica–apparently this is a character he made up for the new book–who was empathetic and purposeful and who used her emotions to … do something sort of important with her life, but it wasn’t really clear what it was.
Exclusive: Robert Wilonsky Reveals His Thoughts on New Observer Editor
As we learned yesterday, the Phoenix-based Dallas Observer (sorry, can’t help myself) has itself a new head editorial honcho. His name is Joe Tone, and he’s not exactly a grizzled alt-weekly veteran. I sought an on-the-record, official comment on this matter from Robert Wilonsky, who has worked for the Observer for nearly 20 years. My journalism question: “How much do you already hate your new 32-year-old boss, who is, by my math, a decade younger than you? Please be detailed in your response, and feel free to use profanity.” Big Bob’s response:
I’m excited about the hire. Those who know Joe within the company have only the best things to say about him, and given his time spent on both the online and print sides, I have no doubt he’ll bring to the joint some fresh ideas, which I look forward to hearing and being part of. I just hope he likes Unfair Park items about deteriorating infrastructure, school budget shortfalls, abandoned downtown buildings and KZEW.
Leading Off (3/31/11)
Cautious Optimism About Trinity Project Emerges. Some good news for the Trinity Project has been released. The U.S. Army Corps says the levee fixes may meet approval. And the project may cost less than what was proposed. Sure, there are still a lot of “mays,” but all I have to say is, “Winning!”
People Are Good. A week ago, 12-year-old Shaquintha Briscoe died in a car wreck. In the seven days since, her family has been unable to give her a funeral because they can’t afford the cost. Shaquintha’s school counselor sent out emails and contacted news stations yesterday to see if the family could get help raising a little more than $600 so the little girl could be buried. About an hour and a half after the story aired, there was an update saying that several people had contacted the station asking to pay the remainder of the costs. Thus, my initial statement: people are good.
Woman Makes Friends by Testing Deadly Nerve Gas. Natalyia Tarasenko is new to the area. So she wanted to do something that would help her meet people. That’s how she became part of the city’s tests to expose citizens to nerve gas and chemical agents in order to better prepare North Texans for disasters and attacks. You, too, can make friends by contacting the Office of Emergency Management. Me? I prefer to just poke random strangers through Facebook.
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