Say it’s Friday, and you have a migraine, but all you have in front of you is a pair of scissors, a metal water bottle, 1/4 of a cream soda, five plastic sporks, 1 box of water crackers, a University of Arkansas coozie, and a pair of not so gently used earbuds.
What would you use to remedy the situation? Because I’m thinking scissors to the temple.
15 comments
Is the water bottle full or empty?
sounds like a job for Macgruber. Macgruber!!
I’d find something to put in that coozie. What do they drink in Arkansas? Natrual light?
1/4 full. I could walk over to the water cooler and make it more full, if I needed to.
The scissors are for the temple of the person who caused the migraine right?
When you say arkansas coozie, you mean a little brown jug with 3 x’s on it right?
If I had a little brown jug with 3 x’s on it, I would not have a migraine. And my blog posts would be more entertaining. But Tim would have to come back behind me and edit out all the cursing.
Fill the water bottle with ice and water so it gets really cold. Put that on the back of your neck, under your bare feet, or in your pants — wherever provides the most relief.
Note to self: Tim is smart.
Second note to self: Securely fasten lid before trying Tim’s suggestions.
Continually drink water, throw away the soda, especially if made with an artificial sweetner) go see your chiropractor. If it gets worse before then, at least grab one of the sporks rather than the scissors (less permanent damage).
I’m sorry, Bethany. WebMD clearly indicates the only cure for a migraine, if female, are things that squirt in the mouth.
Tom? A bag of Gummibursts or something.
@Bethany, yeah you wouldnt want water going down your neck. that would suck.
And I believe that in the vernacular, “University of Arkansas coozie” refers to one’s overeducated girlfriend/female cousin.
Ka-pow!
No rimshot for Carleton?
Y’all, thanks for your help. But I found the correct response:
Drive home, take awesome drugs (phenergan and vicodin – it’s two Benedryl away from being the Keith Richards Special). Pass out.