1. “Jesus Finds Missing Donkey.” You’d read the pants off that story, right? Okay, it doesn’t live up to the headline, but still, everyone likes a heartwarming story about a lost pet finding its way home. Everyone except Tim Rogers, who is a robot.
2. The city’s newly passed ethics measures have caused me to put some of my schemes on the backburner, but I’ll bounce back, just like any supervillain worth his salt would. I may use this as a chance to widen my scope a bit, stop messing around with plans for world domination that key on local zoning issues.
3. “Maybe we’re fixing to have something really good come out of this,” said Sen. John Whitmire, D-Houston, during a committee hearing about the Texas Forensic Science Commission. “There is a real possibility that we could come out with a more effective and stronger commission.” “GREAT timing,” said the ghost of Cameron Todd Willingham.
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The same Cameron Todd Willingham that tried to beat his wife so badly in an attempt to cause her to miscarry their unborn child?
I know that the media keeps telling me that I should feel bad for him, but I just don’t.