Articles for August 24th, 2009
Medieval Times=Best Birthday Ever
On Wednesday, I will turn [redacted] years old. I’m very old. You know what old people like to do? Look back. In my case, I wanted to go way back–to Medieval Times. And so, a few merry maidens and one princely soul accompanied me there last Saturday night. Never been? I hadn’t either. It’s magical. This is a place where lords and ladies enjoy motley menus—tomato soup, garlic bread, a chicken leg, and rib—sans silverware. It’s a little piece of paradise where the Pepsi flows like champagne, and despite the fear of lice and germs, the general public dons headbands and costumes without question. And you know what? It was fabulous. Jump for a few of my favorite things.
ZOMG! Joe Jonas Was At the W Hotel Today!!!
Why? For American Idol auditions. And the numbing refreshment of vodka, because you try dealing with screaming fans all day SMILES.
Speaking of the Jonas Brothers…
Most Powerful Men in Dallas Health Care
Let the great debate begin. Modern Healthcare has released its annual 100 Most Powerful People in Healthcare, and I count four locals on their list.
The highest ranking is Joel Allison, president and CEO of Baylor Health Care System, at No. 29. Right behind him are Doug Hawthorne, CEO of Texas Health Resources (No. 31), and Dean Wilkerson, executive director of the American College of Emergency Physicians (No. 37).
But poor Trevor Fetter. The president and CEO of Tenet Healthcare was the 14th most powerful person in health care just last year. Now he’s fallen all the way to No. 53. My thoughts and prayers are with him and his family today.
Weed Killer Poisoning Texas Water
Altrazine is the key chemical in weed killers. As this NYTimes chart shows, 31% of the population or around 8,000,000 people in Texas are exposed to the chemical, the highest numbers of any state. New research by the Times shows that EPA standards set years ago to set the safe percentage of altrazine a human can drink may be dangerously low.
Jane McGarry, take it from here.
New York Times Insults J.C. Penney, Its Customers, Its Own Readers, And a Wide Swath of America
Cintra Wilson, a “Critical Shopper” columnist for the Times, had this and much more to say about Penney’s opening a new store in Manhattan:
Why would this dowdy Middle American entity waddle into Midtown in its big old shorts and flip-flops without even bothering to update its ancient Helvetica Light logo, which for anyone who grew up with the company is encrusted with decades of boring, even traumatically parental, associations?
A better question might have been, “Why would a struggling newspaper already regarded as an elitist relic allow a smug, shallow fashionista to display her disdain at the first department store to open in Manhattan in 50 years?”
Perhaps I’m being sensitive because J. C. Penney is a hometown store. But perhaps not, since executive editor Bill Keller apologized profusely yesterday, but only after public editor Clark Hoyt ran a devastating column on the paper’s own op-ed Sunday blasting Wilson’s piece. Worst of all was Wilson’s mea culpa, as quoted by Hoyt, where she said she thinks of her audience as
1,300 women in Connecticut and urban gay guys in Manhattan
which, she admitted, is “kind of provincial of me.”
Stream Energy Files Response to Lawsuit
Awhile back, a lawyer named Scott Clearman filed suit against Stream Energy, calling it a pyramid scheme. That prompted Stream’s founder, Rob Snyder, to call Clearman a clown in a bow tie. That didn’t make Scott Clearman very happy. Well, now Stream has filed an official response to the suit. You can read the entire thing here, or you can read the company’s press release after the jump. The high point: where Stream asks the court to throw out Clearman’s suit, essentially, because it is so “inarticulately drafted” (though I’m sure Stream’s attorneys would quibble with my condensation of their fine work).
Houston Disses Downtown Dallas
Ouch, Jeff Moseley, CEO of the Greater Houston Partnership. Sure, you can brag about your fancy medical center, but did you have to pick on the size of downtown Dallas while you did it? You better watch yourself or we’ll ask Jerry to launch his giant space turtle to swallow downtown Houston whole.
Leading Off (08/24/09)
1. A gentleman in Keller gave new meaning to the term “barking mad” yesterday morning. He and a neighbor got into an altercation over a garrulous dog that led him to shoot the neighbor. Even worse: after exiting his neighbor’s tummy, the bullet entered the leg of his own wife. Darn dog!
2. Texas schools are cracking down on “sexting.” Mesquite ISD has even added a new provision to their student handbook prohibiting “sending, sharing, or viewing pictures, texts, or e-mails of a sexual nature…” Remember back in the olden days when we dealt with self-esteem issues through eating disorders and three-way calling? Darn Internet!
3. Due to some “aggressive” towing practices and problems like, oh, say, lost cars, Dallas County is trying to centralize its towing process by hiring a company or two to do all of its towing. Currently, each county commissioner hires the company of his/her choice, and there are no written contracts or uniform procedures for towing and storing cars. In case you ever wondered why retrieving your car costs about $1 million (cash), don’t fret that it’s all going to feed the ferocious junkyard dog that’s always there–no matter which lot you visit. It turns out the county can get up to $100 per car from the towing companies. Darn that I don’t own a tow truck! (Weak. I know. But it’s early, and jokes come in threes.)
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