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Glenn Hunter, Country-And-Western Enthusiast, Is Also A Bookworm

Late in June, Glenn wrote about his adventures in Branson, Missouri, where he went to see country-and-western legends Merle Haggard and Gene Watson. Well, our cerebral adventurer recently returned from Archer City, home of famed author Larry McMurtry (and his four used-book stores) and site of a week-long summer class about narrative nonfiction writing at UNT’s Mayborn Graduate School of Journalism, under the direction of Mayborn writer-in-residence George Getschow. Here’s Glenn’s report.

The Tiger Woods Fartgate: Was It Really David Feherty?

Sometime D Magazine contributor David Faherty has gotten himself embroiled in another controversy. First there was the essay we published in April that got him in trouble. Now, rather than an essay, it appears an issuance is causing him trouble. Watch this video of Tiger at the Buick Open. More importantly, listen. Some are saying it wasn’t he who dealt it. This is a shocking story we will continue to follow.

The Get Real Agency Needs Your Help

A couple of weeks ago I mentioned the Get Real Agency, a casting agency for “real people” started by Dallas entrepreneur Brynn Isom. Well, of course I signed up. I mean, maybe someone is looking for a mid-30s Greek girl for an ad or something (ha!). Anyway, now that I’m a member, I’ve started receiving updates from the agency. There’s a job opening for three seniors–your mom or dad perhaps? Here are the details:

We are looking for 1 male and 3 females (all Caucasian) to be cast in an ad for a retirement village. They should look at least 75 years old and be grey-haired. The client prefers good smiles, bright eyes, healthy, etc. (If you saw the ad, you would want to have lunch with them.)

Shoot info:
Monday 8/10/2009
2 hours 9:30-11:30am
Rate: Each talent will be paid $250

If you know someone who meets these criteria, please have them sign up today! We need to get this casting filled.

Mac Tichenor Joins Belo Broadcasting Board

His grandfather basically invented Tejano radio, and the family built it into a network that in 2003 became the radio division of Univision. Along the way, Tichenor, 54, moved its headquarters from Harlingen to Dallas. In 2007, Univision sold to a private equity combo for $12.3 billion.

My Intern Is More Successful Than I Am

My intern’s name is Laken Litman. She is a journalism major at the University of Texas at Austin, and she wants to be a sportswriter. And, she’s already written for ESPN.com. So, I’m hoping she’ll hire me when she gets out and is running the entire media world.

So Long, Dallas Desperados, Ctd.

Tim’s joke (and it was a good one) aside, I actually am a bit disappointed. My wife’s stepfather is/was a season-ticket holder and took us to a playoff game last year. Though not many — or, obviously, enough — people took advantage of it, Desperados games offered just about the best sports value in the area, especially for families. I guess I could go to an AirHogs game instead, but I doubt I’ll see the same amount of onside kicks.

Expert: No Quick Recovery For Real Estate

It could be four more years before the real estate market stabilizes, a leading expert said in Fort Worth. Texas A&M’s Dr. Mark Dotzour also explained that, when it comes to property, the banking industry’s mantra these days is: “Extend and pretend.”

Junius Heights Man Appealing His Right To An Artificial Lawn

Kudos to Jose Escobedo, the guy with the artificial-turf lawn in Junius Heights. After the Landmark Commission ordered him to rip the lawn up, Escobedo’s vowing to take his lonely AstroTurf crusade to the City Plan Commission and the Dallas City Council, if necessary. I especially liked the anti-Escobedo commenter on an earlier Unfair Park post who said: “This is a historic district, so if you want something fake, move to Frisco.” (A Grade A example of holier-than-thou, phony aesthetic elitism.) Seems to me if you really wanted to save on water, everybody would put in one of these fake lawns.

So Long, Dallas Desperados

Comes news that the Arena Football League is folding. For the rest of our lives, we’ll all remember today and what we were doing when we got this terrible news.

Lewisville High Cheerleaders May Have Gotten High At Cheer Camp

Or maybe not. Either way, this quote from the Morning News‘ story isn’t the most explosive thing I’ve ever read:

“We believe something happened, but we don’t know to what extent,” said Karen Permetti of the Lewisville Independent School District. “We don’t know if it’s Advil or Ectasy.”

If I could add my two cents: I lived in Lewisville for about one year. I never wanted to do drugs so much in my entire life. So, I’m going to go ahead and move my chips over to “probably true.”

Texas Is On Pace For Terrible Record: Most Kids Drowned In One Summer, Ctd.

Just a couple of weeks ago, I wrote the following:

So far this summer, 72 kids have already drowned in the state, including 19 in North Texas.

Sadly, both of those numbers need updating. The statewide record has been achieved (it’s at 84 now, following the deaths of two 7-year-olds at Scurry Lake near Midland), and we’re up to 20 in North Texas (the latest was a 1-year-old who fell into a pool in Garland).

I’ll repeat this again, so this record will (hopefully) never be broken: People! Watch your kids when they’re near water! Any kind. If you see a puddle, make everyone hold hands. If it’s sprinkling outside, get some floaties. Whatever it takes.

The Biggest Water Users in Dallas

Last night, Scott Friedman did a story on NBC Channel 5 about the people in Dallas who use the most water. Ross Perot got a finger wagged at him for using 4.8 million gallons last year. Tom Hicks got the same treatment for using 8.7 million gallons. Friedman began his story by saying, “Some of the wealthiest people in Dallas are swimming in more than just money. They’re also consuming water at a rate that’s 40 to 90 times greater than the typical Dallas household.”

Okay, sure, that’s a lot of water. But how about some context? For this story to make sense, you’ve got to break it down on a per-acre basis. Tom Hicks’s estate includes about 25 acres. That means he uses about 348,000 gallons per acre per year. Is that ridiculously high? I don’t know. Point is, if you’ve got a big house and you’ve got a lot of land, you’re going to use a lot of water.

I’m going to turn comments on, because I bet there’s a FrontBurnervian out there who knows how much water an average Dallas resident uses per acre.

Leading Off (8/4/09)

1. It’s podcast time in the City Hall corruption trial. In yesterday’s episode, listeners heard tapes of former Mayor Pro Tem Don Hill telling a political consultant that he feared Hill’s appointee to the city plan commission, D’Angelo Lee, wasn’t being entirely ethical. “He’s a great brother,” Hill said of Lee, “but he’s moving really fast.” Not even sure I need a joke here. I’m just going to use that phrase at least five times today.

2. Fort Worth-based Radio Shack is rebranding itself as “The Shack.” Rejected names include but are not limited to “Love Shack,” “Shack Attack,” and “Your Local Provider of S-Video Cable.”

3. The McDonald’s at Parkland hospital will close this month, after many years of jokes about the fast-food chain being on the grounds of the hospital. A spokesman for the Parkland McD’s sounds a little defensive when he says:

“The McDonald’s at Parkland offers a variety of great-tasting, quality food choices in a number of serving sizes to fit many nutritional needs.”

On second thought, I’m going to say that at least five times today.