Leading Off (2/17/09)

Posted on February 17th, 2009 8:50am by Eric Celeste
Filed under Local News

1. Advocates for a statewide smoking ban, like Lance Armstrong, are saying the proposal is a “win-win” for Texas. Others, like Zac Crain, differ: they curse a lot, tug at their beards like madmen, and shoot the finger in Austin’s general direction. Then they take a smoke break to calm the eff out. (Zac Crain jokes = gold.)

2. The George W. Bush library will be as big as a Wal-Mart Supercenter, but without the diversity or commitment to traditional conservative business principles one finds in, say, a Wal-Mart. (There’s a better joke there. I just can’t find it. Li’l help, please.)

3. The Dallas Convention Center hotel project is going along just as planned. You know, the plan being to build an unpopular hotel in a dead part of town during a global economic meltdown. (That joke, however, was spot-on. Nailed it!)

14 comments

  1. …but without the crotchety old man at the door who thinks he’s in charge, unless Cheney needs a job?

    @ 8:54 am on February 17, 2009

  2. Las Vegas’ convention business is dying, but by God they’ll come to Dallas because Philip Jones says they will!

    @ 9:00 am on February 17, 2009

  3. Since I don’t shop at Wal-Mart I didn’t know the greeters were crotchety. I was thinking Karl Rove might be the guy. Post-prison Karl Rove, I’m thinking.

    @ 9:01 am on February 17, 2009

  4. Instead of leading off, perhaps you should call it “Sleeping In.”

    @ 9:10 am on February 17, 2009

  5. The George W. Bush Presidential Library will be as big as a Wal-Mart Supercenter, and will likewise feature efficient departments: The Guantanamo Fitting Room, Electronics and Surveillance, Domestics & Homeland Security, and a large Clearance area for the Economy.

    @ 9:13 am on February 17, 2009

  6. I like the word crotchety. It’s funny.

    @ 9:30 am on February 17, 2009

  7. @Bobby

    Nothing’s changed, we’ve got continuity, baby!

    @ 9:32 am on February 17, 2009

  8. Irascible and testy are funny too. And no one can suppress laughter at drop of the word monkey but it would be hard to shoehorn it into a post about Wal-Mart. And Bush. Wait.

    @ 9:34 am on February 17, 2009

  9. Speaking of, where’s Bill Marvel?

    (I kid, I kid. Love ya, Bill.)

    @ 9:37 am on February 17, 2009

  10. I’ve never seen a crotchety bush.

    @ 9:37 am on February 17, 2009

  11. You must be pretty young, then.

    @ 10:00 am on February 17, 2009

  12. you know, if mayor big hands wants to run a hotel so bad, i’m sure a holiday inn or la quinta needs a night manager.

    @ 10:15 am on February 17, 2009

  13. “It’s like a cake being baked in the oven. It’s still changing,”

    Because when I think about dramatic and fluid change, I think about cake. The metamorphosis is astounding. Really.

    @ 11:08 am on February 17, 2009

  14. @brett, I hear the Dallas Grand Hotel is looking for a manager. Its a fixer-upper.

    @ 2:36 pm on February 17, 2009