Say It Ain’t So, Tony Romo!

Posted on May 13th, 2008 12:03pm by Eric Celeste
Filed under Local News

The Superficial is rumoring that the Cowboy quarterbacking lothario broke up with Sweet Jess this weekend, while he was hammered and carousing in Chicago. It also says he did so while she was on speakerphone, as he mocked her bedroom style to his boys. This can’t be true, right? Unless she needs a 40-year-old bald shoulder to cry on. Then, let’s hope it is.

12 comments

  1. I love BIG boobs.

    @ 12:05 pm on May 13, 2008

  2. If true, this could partially offset the bad karma invited by allowing Hard Knocks to film Cowboys’ training camp. Or, given the manner in which it was accomplished, plus T.O.’s new sitcom, trebles the bad karma.

    Then again, we have Uncle Wade at the helm, he can surely navigate ably these treacherous waters.

    @ 12:31 pm on May 13, 2008

  3. Ouch – right before Ashlee’s not-so-shotgun wedding this Saturday. If it’s true, I guess that is one way of telling Jess, he won’t be at the wedding!

    @ 12:34 pm on May 13, 2008

  4. Me too. It’s why I read the comments on Frontburner.

    @ 12:37 pm on May 13, 2008

  5. Bethany just checked in with the line of the day. Nicely done. (standing and slow clapping)

    @ 12:58 pm on May 13, 2008

  6. If accurate, Jerry Jones should be just a bit concerned with his qb’s maturity level and priorities.

    @ 12:59 pm on May 13, 2008

  7. http://extratv.warnerbros.com/2008/05/simpson_and_romo_to_splitsvill.php

    @ 1:17 pm on May 13, 2008

  8. Romo is setting himself up to be a successful punchline, not quarterback. Bye, bye Super Bowl ‘boys. Ain’t gonna happen.

    @ 1:55 pm on May 13, 2008

  9. JIm; Keep the faith. Last time I looked, Tom Brady was doing pretty good at football even though he has been, shall we say, a pinch cavalier with some famous females. Impregnating one while dumping another.

    Hell,if anyone on this blog had any real trash to compost, you’d start the rumor that Ashlee’s shotgun mariage is ’cause she’s carrying Tony’s child and Jess is banging K-Fed. Where are you freelancers when we need ‘em? Hello?

    Warning: Celeste is omitting in this post (offering his shoulder to Jess) that his newly maniacal workout regimen is making his torso so taunt that the mere touch by Simpson would likely chip her (silk tip) nails.

    @ 2:37 pm on May 13, 2008

  10. Pork Lover:

    I’m not trying to bust you too badly, but your observation that “Jerry Jones should be just a bit concerned with his qb’s maturity level and priorities” made me laugh out loud.

    DUDE: the Head Guy of this organization is Jerry Jones!?! Remember? The guy who shows up drunk to pea**** around Hotel ZaZa with his dancing girlfriends in tow (while his security detail nervously scans the crowd for photography-inclined bystanders).

    Fish rot from the head first, my friend.

    Towards fully fitting into the Cowboys Morality Landscape, maybe Romo should just head out on the town armed to the teeth for a Trim Hunt with Smiley, Pacman & Tank. Anyway, we all wondered when the Four Horsemen might ride again.

    @ 2:59 pm on May 13, 2008

  11. [the Head Guy of this organization is Jerry Jones!?! Remember? The guy who shows up drunk to pea**** around Hotel ZaZa(or Martini Park) with his dancing girlfriends in tow (while his security detail nervously scans the crowd for photography-inclined bystanders).]

    All too true. I’m pretty sure those were “paid” girlfriends and the outfits they had on were horrible! Like pearls make a difference?

    I complained to Jer about the whole Romo issue and that Tony’s mind was in Jessica’s pants instead of on the game and he informed me that as far as the entire team was concerned his players weren’t getting laid enough!

    I don’t care what kind of stadium is going up, the Cowboys are Goin’Down.

    @ 3:48 pm on May 13, 2008

  12. Making his torso so taunt?

    “Go away, Jessica, or I shall taunt you a second time…”

    @ 5:03 pm on May 13, 2008