Open Letter to the Convention Center
Dear Convention Center:
You are so awesome — though you’d be totally awesomer if you had a hotel attached to you. While you’re working on that, can I ask you something about your website? Why does it have so many mistakes on it? I’ve sent along the blurb about you that pops up prominently on your homepage. I’ve noted the corrections in red.
“Welcome to the Center of the Universe. The Dallas Convention Center has over more than 1,000,000 square feet. And it offers a staggering 726,726 square feet of prime, contiguous exhibit space, along with a 203,000-square-foot column-free exhibit hall, the largest in the U.S. Plus, the Dallas Convention Center offers even more great features, like such as a 9,816-seat arena, a theater with a 1,750-person capacity and 96 meeting rooms.”
You’re welcome, Convention Center. I love you.
30 Comments to “Open Letter to the Convention Center”
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That’s why you get the big bucks. It’s job security for you.
The “more than” and “such as” corrections seem a little nitpicky.
What’s wrong with such as? :->
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lj3iNxZ8Dww
Wow. I could never get away with that kind of sloppy work product, which is all internal to my company. To show that kind of illiteracy or sloppiness for all the world to see is amazing. If I were a prospect, I’d wonder what kind of outfit was running that place; I’d wonder if that was indicative of the quality I would receive if I brought my meeting there. Sad.
Over is a spatial reference. More than is more appropriate in this instance.
I will dangle you over a cliff if you submit copy with more than 10 mistakes.
See?
I swear to God that wasn’t written by me.
hey, who’s the nazi who took my away my comment?
Nice post, Tim. However, in your post, shouldn’t “website” be written (typed) “Web site?”
Bethany, I will dangle you more than a cliff.
Promises, promises.
I have to quibble with the correction of “over 1,000,000 square feet.” Even the AP Style Guide (or at least my edition) says that “over” may be used with quantities, and I was always taught that “over” is to be preferred when talking about non-discrete quantities such as square feet, where one is the same as the next. “Over” has also been used historically with quantities for hundreds of years.
McDonald’s once used “over” for the billions of hamburgers sold. Of course that takes up less space on the sign.
have you guys read the Nigerian page for the convention center?
“Peace in the Lord, Welcome my dear friend to the Center of Universe
The Dallas Convention Center have over ONE MILLION square feet which is very safe and guaranteed to make you profitable. And it offers a enormous and yet staggering 726,726 square feet of unbelievable you must see prime, contiguous exhibit space which can be secured with a cashier’s check along with a TWO HUNDRED MILLION -square-foot column-free and most very safe exhibit hall, the largest in the entire world, Plus, the Dallas Convention Center gives to you bank account even more great features and anomolities, like a 9,816-seat arena which you are a beneficary to, a theater with a 1,750-person co-pacity and 96 meeting rooms for varyous transactions. Please send me your shipping, phone and bank info so that I may reserve this space for you.
I think the issue is bigger than “over” vs. “more than”, although I too prefer “more than” in that context. The point is that this site is the convention center’s (and by extension, the city’s) face to the world, and we’ve just discovered that it’s a really ugly & stupid-looking face. Tim did the city a favor by pointing out these errors in a public forum. Embarrassment can be very motivating (assuming, of course, that those responsible are capable of feeling embarrassment).
My own view is that the paragraph is trite and tiresome even with Tim’s edits. They should have at least tried using bullet points. And they should have dropped the overheated adjectives. “Staggering”?? Gag. Who wrote this crap and why are we still paying them?
I agree with Eric’s post above. The overall sloppiness of the site reveals a shameful carelessness and inattention to detail on the part of the city and has probably already driven away potential convention bookings. People DO notice these kinds of errors and draw logical conclusions from them. It is inconceivable to me that no one within city government or the convention and visitors bureau noticed these problems, which after all appear on the front page of the convention center’s website.
I like the idea of a convention center hotel but I am starting to change my mind. If this website represents the best the city can do to market our convention center to the world, then the council cannot possibly expect taxpayers to put up a single penny for a hotel. What a disaster.
To Angela Hunt and other city-government types: We know you read Frontburner. What say you? Do you think this website is acceptable work product? Commercial website design isn’t cheap. How much of our money have you wasted?
How about cleaning up the “square foot” references? To hyphenate, not to hyphenate, that is the question.
Also, by AP style, “1,000,000″ should be written “1 million.”
And, of course, if you’re pimping the size of your facility, maybe “staggering” is not the word to use unless you’re trying to get all the whisky/whiskey conventions to come to town.
Poorly written; poorly edited.
I am, if the city is interested,available for hire — I am familiar with at least 23 of the 26 letters of the alphabet and most of the punctuation marks.
Here is another suggested change (highlighted in red) - this one to the menu bar at the top of the page:
“Calendar of Events | Weather | Site Map | Contact Us”
Doh. The HTML tag didn’t work. I changed “Calendar Events” to “Calendar of Events”
Do they need a fact checker too? I’m pretty sure the Dallas Convention Center isn’t the center of the universe. That would be Arlington.
Werds? ferget them werds, It’s da photos that make me puke.
If a photo is worth a thousand werds than there’s three thousand bad words on the opening page. If they want some staggering photography, I too am for hire,
Isn’t it appropriate for the Dallas Convention Center to have DISD represented on the homepage of its Web site?
I think you ****** should just resolve this with a public challenge of circle jerk.
These quality control experts and master marketers are the same yahoos that said the expansion a few years ago would solve everything. Hmmmm.
OK…I just wonder…they have “over 1,000,000 square feet” OF WHAT??????
I think a proper sentence would include something like “one million square feet of convention and meeting space.”
“more than” is a proper and appropriate correction, although it’s pure copy ed-wonkery. I’d bet dollars to doughnuts Saul Bellow has used “over” in the same context scores of times.
Please…enough of the critique. I told my dog he wasn’t qualified, but he needed the work. He’s the bestedest web designer ever!…….for a dog.
I can say “buttload”, right? And “the city where a president was shot”, right? It’s just the other word, which is your fault because wordpress should have caught it and turned “********” into “****load”.
see?
Check out the DCC site, they made all of Tim’s changes including “more than”: http://www.dallasconventioncenter.com
Now all they need to do is insert a space between “than” and “1,000,000″ and in the menu bar at the top of the page change “Calendar Events” to “Calendar of Events”. Nit picky I know, but as the site says, “We are the face of Dallas. Through us you see Dallas as a business-focused, dynamic, multicultural city. But more than that, we are the spirit of Dallas. Friendly. Fun-loving. Efficient. Thorough. Creative. Our approach, our response, our commitment to you — these are the things that truly create your first impression.” Actually it’s the website that creates the first impression for most people. Fix the remaining errors, then think about a hiring a competent website designer.
The questions that still must be answered: How long were these errors visible to the world before someone noticed? How much did the taxpayers spend for this embarrassing mistake-filled mess? If the city can’t be trusted to competently maintain the convention center’s website, the sole purpose of which is to attract convention business to Dallas, why should the taxpayers be expected to put up money for a hotel? Has any disciplinary action been taken against the employees or contractors responsible for this fiasco? And if not, why not?
The comma terrorists have won….
“Calendar Events” still on top-of-page.
oh, it’s coming.