Posted on April 3rd, 2008 1:07pm by Zac Crain
Filed under Music
Amy Winehouse and Britney Spears need to go to rehab? Managers and various hangers-on aren’t willing to tell musicians what they need to hear? You think so, doctor? Updated list of things Don Henley is bad at:
Writing songs
Singing songs
Drumming
Extemporaneous speech
Cogent thought
25 comments
Has-been.
@ 1:24 pm on April 3, 2008
Gooses! Geeses!
I want my geese to lay gold eggs for Easter!
@ 1:32 pm on April 3, 2008
Add “Responding to media coverage.” Be prepared. He’s probably already got his lawyers preparing a nasty letter telling you about his right to privacy. Those same lawyers are paid with money from Henley’s record/CD sales.
@ 1:35 pm on April 3, 2008
You should interview the people remodeling/decorating his house. I hear the job is living hell…and that it has been going on for some time.
People with more money than sense and nothing better to do.
Jesus, man can you change the channel…i’ve had a rough night and i hate the effin Eagles, man
@ 3:16 pm on April 3, 2008
True Story: I once attended a party at the trust-fund-son home of Henley’s neighbor. No kidding, he (or someone at his place) called the cops because the music was too loud. The offending tunes were coming from a portable CD player we had carried out back from the garage. It was about 8:45 on a Satuday night and as I recall it was a Pavement record.
I would rather be featured on “To Catch a Predator” than in an Eagles video.
Rock n’ Roll for people who don’t want to rock.
How ’bout Mr. Crain gives them the old S.o.K treatment?
@ 4:21 pm on April 3, 2008
How much plastic surgery has he had?
@ 4:27 pm on April 3, 2008
md: I’ll do another SoK soon, but probably not on the Eagles. That’s a layup. I like to work for my points.
@ 4:37 pm on April 3, 2008
He’s a tortured artist
Used to be in the Eagles
Now he whines
Like a wounded beagle
Poet of despair!
Pumped up with hot air!
He’s serious, pretentious
And I just don’t care
Don Henley must die!
Don’t let him get back together
With Glenn Frey!
Don Henley must die!
Don Henley must die!
Put a sharp stick in his eye!
Don Henley must die!
Quit playin’ that crap
You’re out of the band
I’m only kidding
Can’t you tell?
I love his sensitive music
Idiot poetry, swell
You and your kind
Are killing rock and roll
It’s not because you are O L D
It’s cause you ain’t got no soul!
Don’t be afraid of fun
Loosen up your ponytail!
Be wild, young, free and dumb
Get your head out of your tail
Don Henley must die!
Don’t let him get back together
With Glenn Frey!
Don Henley must die!
Put him in the electric chair
Watch him fry!
Don Henley must die
Don Henley must die
No Eagles reunion
The same goes for you, Sting!
@ 4:42 pm on April 3, 2008
(Mojo Nixon)
@ 4:42 pm on April 3, 2008
Zac Crain:
Charles Oakley- YES
Del Curry/Steve Kerr- NO
@ 5:00 pm on April 3, 2008
Don Henley had my two love child. With all apologies to Debbie Gibson and Skid Roper.
@ 7:04 pm on April 3, 2008
So he’s a grumpy old man. But extrapolating that to him not being a good singer/songwriter is ridiculous.
@ 8:59 am on April 4, 2008
I think that’s a chicken/egg thing, mm. Was he a terrible singer-songwriter before he was a grumpy old man, or was he grumpy before he became a terrible singer-songwriter? Without access to a wormhole or a Delorean, I’ll never know for sure, so I’ll just say yes.
@ 9:08 am on April 4, 2008
Puddin’:
The house renovation began around the time he bought it — which was @ 1992. It’s still not finished. In the meantime he has added at least two neighboriung properties to his Dallas Compound.
@ 9:35 am on April 4, 2008
wow, looks like Donnie boy has not changed! y’all are lucky this site is still up and he has not gotten his attack dog Irving Azoff to sue to have it taken down. My husband used to work for the Eagles during their 70′s heyday, boy some of the crazy drug fueled things they would do he’s told me. Anyway, he has said on more than a few occasions what an asshole Henley was. Major grade A JERK! None of the road crew like Henley. They all loved Joe-funny guy–very nice, Glenn–heart of gold, Don FELDER–another nice guy with a big heart, and Randy–one of the nicest quietest politest men he’s ever met, but Henley was an Grade A #1 ASS. Looks like he hasn’t changed much so you cant blame it on the cocaine he did. He still say to this day DH is the reason the band broke up because he was/is such an arrogant controlling LITTLE prick. when all the others just wanted to, for the most part, was to just play their music, Henley was always stirring to pot and starting sh*t.
And to “md” i showed my husband your post about the EARLY party, he said it did not surprise him one bit. He said Don was probably just pissed y’all weren’t playing “Witchy Woman” or “One of These Nights.”
@ 9:36 pm on June 12, 2008
Change that to MASSIVE amounts of Cocaine Henley did. Huge! And he is still jerk even though he is drug free. Must be something in his DNA and the grumpy old guy cant help it.
@ 5:39 am on June 13, 2008
No shit, you are spot on ORW. If anyone thinks The Eagles were choir boys and were not only writing about “Life in The Fast Lane,” but LIVING that life as well back in their 70′s prime…then i got a bridge to sell ya. Sidenote: “Life in The Fast Lane” was inspired by the bands coke dealer, him and Glenn Frey were traveling down a Cali freeway one night HIGH HIGH as a kite on coke at a very high rate of speed, and Glenn Frey told him to “slow down,” and the coke dealer “friend” replied, “this is life in the fast lane baby!” So there you have it, not only the makings for a great song that they not only wrote, BUT LIVED. And yes Henley did get caught with an underage 16 year old GIRL in his bed in 1980. Don Henley would have been 33 or 34 years old at the time. The world was their oyster back then, and The Eagles had BUCKETS full of em’!!
@ 12:33 am on August 27, 2008
This is interesting. I was just ranting on a blog, remembered a bad moment with Don Henley. He was in Deep Ellum, spring 1989. They were shooting some of the Innocence video. I was a street musician then, but I’d made friends with the guy who ran the business/the building they wanted to use for the video. So I happened to be hanging out there the same time as Henley. With as much respect and politeness as I could muster, I asked him if I could play him one of my songs. Of course he brushed me off. And not very civilly either. Hated him ever since. Funny, because after blogging about him I was curious if I was alone. Apparently not! I also loved Mojo Nixon’s song.
@ 3:42 pm on September 15, 2008
My husbands family runs a security firm, and we handle major concert venues in our area (am not saying where for OBVIOUS reasons). Anyhow my blond, hazel eyed, petite, slender very pretty 22 year old sister-in-law was around the backstage checking on one of our employees, when the Eagles played our town on their last tour, and Don Henley propositioned “Amber” quite bluntly! made no bones, no pun intended, about what he was after. She was not in the least bit interested, actually thought he was Glenn Fry at first, she’s not a big Eagles fan, and said something to the effect to Mr. Henley about his being married—i think she maybe noticed his wedding ring or something–and he said his 3 or 4–can’t remember how many, children were of school age and back @ home with “the wife” in Dallas. She also said that if she wanted to screw someone old enough to be her grandfather, she would hang out at the local bingo hall. Needless to say, he did not get any that night, not from her anyway. Maybe he lucked out and got some botoxed boob enhanced middle aged old 70′s era groupie MILF (lord knows there was plenty of them there that night, except for the MILF part though) who was willing to do the deed. True story, happened whenever their last tour was, seems like it was about year or so ago.
@ 11:20 am on October 11, 2008
underage 16 year old GIRL in his bed in 1980. Don Henley would have been 33 or 34 years old at the time. The world was their oyster back then, and The Eagles had BUCKETS full of em’!!———–
Not only did jerk off a** wipe supreme overrated, overaged, over dyed, balding, Don Henley get caught with jail bait young enough to be his daughter back in 80′, she practically overdosed and died from all the alcohol, cocaine, Quaaludes, and marijuana the mother f’er gave her. BTW, his wife is an old manly looking hag who was supposedly a model back in the day. I don’t see it, average face, dark hair, nothing @ all special. anyways, No wonder he still tries to get with young skinny 22 year old pretty blonds.
@ 5:07 pm on November 12, 2008
Don’t like Don Henley, hm?
Well, if you do or not – HE IS RIGHT.
And he is one of the best song writer ever.
@ 2:24 am on January 16, 2009
Don- your song dirty laundry hits home 4 real seems like society cant get enough of peop[les buisness after they pass sorry as it sounds its true
@ 1:48 am on February 11, 2009
FrontBurner® launched in March 2003, the first blog in Dallas run by a media organization. This is where the editors of D Magazine come to waste a tremendous amount of time.
25 comments
Has-been.
Gooses! Geeses!
I want my geese to lay gold eggs for Easter!
Add “Responding to media coverage.” Be prepared. He’s probably already got his lawyers preparing a nasty letter telling you about his right to privacy. Those same lawyers are paid with money from Henley’s record/CD sales.
You should interview the people remodeling/decorating his house. I hear the job is living hell…and that it has been going on for some time.
People with more money than sense and nothing better to do.
One good thing came out of Don’s interview..i found this link to hear Willie’s full-CD “One Hell of a Ride” at http://spinner.aol.com/artists/new-releases-full-cds?defaultTab=4
“Vivaaa Viagra”
Jesus, man can you change the channel…i’ve had a rough night and i hate the effin Eagles, man
True Story: I once attended a party at the trust-fund-son home of Henley’s neighbor. No kidding, he (or someone at his place) called the cops because the music was too loud. The offending tunes were coming from a portable CD player we had carried out back from the garage. It was about 8:45 on a Satuday night and as I recall it was a Pavement record.
I would rather be featured on “To Catch a Predator” than in an Eagles video.
Rock n’ Roll for people who don’t want to rock.
How ’bout Mr. Crain gives them the old S.o.K treatment?
How much plastic surgery has he had?
md: I’ll do another SoK soon, but probably not on the Eagles. That’s a layup. I like to work for my points.
He’s a tortured artist
Used to be in the Eagles
Now he whines
Like a wounded beagle
Poet of despair!
Pumped up with hot air!
He’s serious, pretentious
And I just don’t care
Don Henley must die!
Don’t let him get back together
With Glenn Frey!
Don Henley must die!
Don Henley must die!
Put a sharp stick in his eye!
Don Henley must die!
Quit playin’ that crap
You’re out of the band
I’m only kidding
Can’t you tell?
I love his sensitive music
Idiot poetry, swell
You and your kind
Are killing rock and roll
It’s not because you are O L D
It’s cause you ain’t got no soul!
Don’t be afraid of fun
Loosen up your ponytail!
Be wild, young, free and dumb
Get your head out of your tail
Don Henley must die!
Don’t let him get back together
With Glenn Frey!
Don Henley must die!
Put him in the electric chair
Watch him fry!
Don Henley must die
Don Henley must die
No Eagles reunion
The same goes for you, Sting!
(Mojo Nixon)
Zac Crain:
Charles Oakley- YES
Del Curry/Steve Kerr- NO
Don Henley had my two love child. With all apologies to Debbie Gibson and Skid Roper.
So he’s a grumpy old man. But extrapolating that to him not being a good singer/songwriter is ridiculous.
I think that’s a chicken/egg thing, mm. Was he a terrible singer-songwriter before he was a grumpy old man, or was he grumpy before he became a terrible singer-songwriter? Without access to a wormhole or a Delorean, I’ll never know for sure, so I’ll just say yes.
Puddin’:
The house renovation began around the time he bought it — which was @ 1992. It’s still not finished. In the meantime he has added at least two neighboriung properties to his Dallas Compound.
wow, looks like Donnie boy has not changed! y’all are lucky this site is still up and he has not gotten his attack dog Irving Azoff to sue to have it taken down. My husband used to work for the Eagles during their 70′s heyday, boy some of the crazy drug fueled things they would do he’s told me. Anyway, he has said on more than a few occasions what an asshole Henley was. Major grade A JERK! None of the road crew like Henley. They all loved Joe-funny guy–very nice, Glenn–heart of gold, Don FELDER–another nice guy with a big heart, and Randy–one of the nicest quietest politest men he’s ever met, but Henley was an Grade A #1 ASS. Looks like he hasn’t changed much so you cant blame it on the cocaine he did. He still say to this day DH is the reason the band broke up because he was/is such an arrogant controlling LITTLE prick. when all the others just wanted to, for the most part, was to just play their music, Henley was always stirring to pot and starting sh*t.
And to “md” i showed my husband your post about the EARLY party, he said it did not surprise him one bit. He said Don was probably just pissed y’all weren’t playing “Witchy Woman” or “One of These Nights.”
Change that to MASSIVE amounts of Cocaine Henley did. Huge! And he is still jerk even though he is drug free. Must be something in his DNA and the grumpy old guy cant help it.
No shit, you are spot on ORW. If anyone thinks The Eagles were choir boys and were not only writing about “Life in The Fast Lane,” but LIVING that life as well back in their 70′s prime…then i got a bridge to sell ya. Sidenote: “Life in The Fast Lane” was inspired by the bands coke dealer, him and Glenn Frey were traveling down a Cali freeway one night HIGH HIGH as a kite on coke at a very high rate of speed, and Glenn Frey told him to “slow down,” and the coke dealer “friend” replied, “this is life in the fast lane baby!” So there you have it, not only the makings for a great song that they not only wrote, BUT LIVED. And yes Henley did get caught with an underage 16 year old GIRL in his bed in 1980. Don Henley would have been 33 or 34 years old at the time. The world was their oyster back then, and The Eagles had BUCKETS full of em’!!
This is interesting. I was just ranting on a blog, remembered a bad moment with Don Henley. He was in Deep Ellum, spring 1989. They were shooting some of the Innocence video. I was a street musician then, but I’d made friends with the guy who ran the business/the building they wanted to use for the video. So I happened to be hanging out there the same time as Henley. With as much respect and politeness as I could muster, I asked him if I could play him one of my songs. Of course he brushed me off. And not very civilly either. Hated him ever since. Funny, because after blogging about him I was curious if I was alone. Apparently not! I also loved Mojo Nixon’s song.
My husbands family runs a security firm, and we handle major concert venues in our area (am not saying where for OBVIOUS reasons). Anyhow my blond, hazel eyed, petite, slender very pretty 22 year old sister-in-law was around the backstage checking on one of our employees, when the Eagles played our town on their last tour, and Don Henley propositioned “Amber” quite bluntly! made no bones, no pun intended, about what he was after. She was not in the least bit interested, actually thought he was Glenn Fry at first, she’s not a big Eagles fan, and said something to the effect to Mr. Henley about his being married—i think she maybe noticed his wedding ring or something–and he said his 3 or 4–can’t remember how many, children were of school age and back @ home with “the wife” in Dallas. She also said that if she wanted to screw someone old enough to be her grandfather, she would hang out at the local bingo hall. Needless to say, he did not get any that night, not from her anyway. Maybe he lucked out and got some botoxed boob enhanced middle aged old 70′s era groupie MILF (lord knows there was plenty of them there that night, except for the MILF part though) who was willing to do the deed. True story, happened whenever their last tour was, seems like it was about year or so ago.
underage 16 year old GIRL in his bed in 1980. Don Henley would have been 33 or 34 years old at the time. The world was their oyster back then, and The Eagles had BUCKETS full of em’!!———–
Not only did jerk off a** wipe supreme overrated, overaged, over dyed, balding, Don Henley get caught with jail bait young enough to be his daughter back in 80′, she practically overdosed and died from all the alcohol, cocaine, Quaaludes, and marijuana the mother f’er gave her. BTW, his wife is an old manly looking hag who was supposedly a model back in the day. I don’t see it, average face, dark hair, nothing @ all special. anyways, No wonder he still tries to get with young skinny 22 year old pretty blonds.
Don’t like Don Henley, hm?
Well, if you do or not – HE IS RIGHT.
And he is one of the best song writer ever.
Don- your song dirty laundry hits home 4 real seems like society cant get enough of peop[les buisness after they pass sorry as it sounds its true