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Don Henley Says Something Extremely Obvious, Continues Being Terrible

Posted on April 3rd, 2008 1:07pm by Zac Crain
Filed under Music

Amy Winehouse and Britney Spears need to go to rehab? Managers and various hangers-on aren’t willing to tell musicians what they need to hear? You think so, doctor? Updated list of things Don Henley is bad at:

Writing songs
Singing songs
Drumming
Extemporaneous speech
Cogent thought

17 Comments to “Don Henley Says Something Extremely Obvious, Continues Being Terrible”

Puddin'Tane @ April 3rd, 2008 at 1:24 pm

Has-been.
Bethany @ April 3rd, 2008 at 1:32 pm

Gooses! Geeses!
I want my geese to lay gold eggs for Easter!
Dooner @ April 3rd, 2008 at 1:35 pm

Add “Responding to media coverage.” Be prepared. He’s probably already got his lawyers preparing a nasty letter telling you about his right to privacy. Those same lawyers are paid with money from Henley’s record/CD sales.
Puddin'Tane @ April 3rd, 2008 at 1:41 pm

You should interview the people remodeling/decorating his house. I hear the job is living hell…and that it has been going on for some time.

People with more money than sense and nothing better to do.
david @ April 3rd, 2008 at 2:17 pm

One good thing came out of Don’s interview..i found this link to hear Willie’s full-CD “One Hell of a Ride” at http://spinner.aol.com/artists.....faultTab=4
UndecidedTXn @ April 3rd, 2008 at 2:36 pm

“Vivaaa Viagra”
jrp @ April 3rd, 2008 at 3:16 pm

Jesus, man can you change the channel…i’ve had a rough night and i hate the effin Eagles, man
md @ April 3rd, 2008 at 4:21 pm

True Story: I once attended a party at the trust-fund-son home of Henley’s neighbor. No kidding, he (or someone at his place) called the cops because the music was too loud. The offending tunes were coming from a portable CD player we had carried out back from the garage. It was about 8:45 on a Satuday night and as I recall it was a Pavement record.

I would rather be featured on “To Catch a Predator” than in an Eagles video.

Rock n’ Roll for people who don’t want to rock.

How ’bout Mr. Crain gives them the old S.o.K treatment?
Sean @ April 3rd, 2008 at 4:27 pm

How much plastic surgery has he had?
Zac Crain @ April 3rd, 2008 at 4:37 pm

md: I’ll do another SoK soon, but probably not on the Eagles. That’s a layup. I like to work for my points.
Daniel @ April 3rd, 2008 at 4:42 pm

He’s a tortured artist
Used to be in the Eagles
Now he whines
Like a wounded beagle
Poet of despair!
Pumped up with hot air!
He’s serious, pretentious
And I just don’t care
Don Henley must die!
Don’t let him get back together
With Glenn Frey!
Don Henley must die!

Don Henley must die!
Put a sharp stick in his eye!
Don Henley must die!

Quit playin’ that crap
You’re out of the band

I’m only kidding
Can’t you tell?
I love his sensitive music
Idiot poetry, swell
You and your kind
Are killing rock and roll
It’s not because you are O L D
It’s cause you ain’t got no soul!
Don’t be afraid of fun
Loosen up your ponytail!
Be wild, young, free and dumb
Get your head out of your tail
Don Henley must die!
Don’t let him get back together
With Glenn Frey!

Don Henley must die!
Put him in the electric chair
Watch him fry!
Don Henley must die
Don Henley must die
No Eagles reunion
The same goes for you, Sting!
Daniel @ April 3rd, 2008 at 4:42 pm

(Mojo Nixon)
md @ April 3rd, 2008 at 5:00 pm

Zac Crain:
Charles Oakley- YES
Del Curry/Steve Kerr- NO
Sam R @ April 3rd, 2008 at 7:04 pm

Don Henley had my two love child. With all apologies to Debbie Gibson and Skid Roper.
mm @ April 4th, 2008 at 8:59 am

So he’s a grumpy old man. But extrapolating that to him not being a good singer/songwriter is ridiculous.
Zac Crain @ April 4th, 2008 at 9:08 am

I think that’s a chicken/egg thing, mm. Was he a terrible singer-songwriter before he was a grumpy old man, or was he grumpy before he became a terrible singer-songwriter? Without access to a wormhole or a Delorean, I’ll never know for sure, so I’ll just say yes.
John @ April 4th, 2008 at 9:35 am

Puddin’:

The house renovation began around the time he bought it — which was @ 1992. It’s still not finished. In the meantime he has added at least two neighboriung properties to his Dallas Compound.