Caption This, Because I Have No Words

Courtesy of Shutdown Corner.

Angie Harmon Hearts John McCain

Dallas native Angie Harmon is speaking out who she’s voting for, and it ain’t Obama (gasp).

“There are a lot more people in L.A. voting for McCain than you think,” Harmon said in the newest issue of Us Weekly, on newsstands now. “We have an underground Republican Party!”

I would insert a joke here, but I don’t want to offend Jessica.

Arthur Laffer: Demo Win Would Lead To ‘Fiscal Crisis’

Tax-cutting economist Arthur B. Laffer, creator of the “Laffer curve” and the father of supply-side economics, isn’t really a partisan guy. He was an adviser to Ronald Reagan, sure, but he also voted for Bill Clinton twice and calls JFK “as great a president as we ever had.” That said, Laffer predicts that if Barack Obama or Hillary Clinton is elected president this year, we’re in for “one of the biggest fiscal crises of my lifetime. … We will face what they call in Hawaii ‘the Big Kahuna,’ because we will be changing the face of America very dramatically.” Jump now to find out why. (more…)

Clinton Campaign Press Office: ENOUGH ALREADY!

Aghaljoiweljelpeskl. I’ve had it! Right now, I count 45 e-mails in my inbox from the Clinton campaign in the last several weeks. And that’s not including the ones I’ve already deleted. I understand alerting voters when The Hill Dawg is making an appearance around town, but do we really need to know that Sean Astin and Grammy Award-winning artists La Mafia are endorsing her? Answer: No. It’s enough to make a girl vote Obama, or even—gasp!—Republican. I have no idea how I got on the e-mail list, but I sure know how to get off it. Un. Sub. Scribe.

Model Ali Michael Gains 5 Pounds, Gets Sent Home

We’ve talked here before about Colleyville gal Ali Michael. Last time, it was about the controversy over her “semi-nude” fashion photos. Now comes this: casting directors for Paris runway shows sent her packing because her legs were “too plump.” I don’t know a whole lot about fashion, but I do know legs. Ali, your gams look great. Keep eating, girl.

McCain At TI

In about one hour, John McCain will speak at a TI employees “Town Hall” meeting. Don’t know if it’s open to the public, but anyone who wants to might try.

UPDATE: What to expect if you do go.

Where We All Should Have Been Last Night

At Ghostbar. Erykah Badu and Dave Chappelle were there, and we’ve got the photo gallery to prove it. Sidenote: Nice work, Willie Nixx. Oh, and hi Amber Campisi.

James Fantroy Guilty

So reports the DMN. He shoulda used the Clay Davis defense.

Welcome to Dallas, Brad Richards

As FrontBurner’s Resident Sports Expert®, I’m very excited about the Stars’ latest trade. Why? Because at 27, Brad is in the prime of his career. He helped the Tampa Bay Lightning win a Stanley Cup in 2004, scoring 12 goals and a league-leading 26 in 23 post-season games. He set an NHL record that post season with seven game-winning goals, earning him the Conn Smythe Trophy as playoff MVP. He’s a solid two-way center who plays well at either end of the ice. Oh, and also, he looks like this:

Oh, and welcome to you, too, Johan Holmqvist. Excited to have you here also.

How “March Madness, Dallas Edition” Was Won

In the Pulse section of our March issue, we included an NCAA Tournament-style bracket pitting various Dallas-related people, places, and things against one another. After the jump, a look at how the tourney shook out. (Note: I can’t find the link, or else it hasn’t been posted. So grab a copy and cozy up to your computer, CueCat-style.)

UPDATE: Here’s the bracket.

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William F. Buckley: Final Tribute

This photo was taken after I bought and delivered a Big Mac to Bill and his sister Priscilla on our tour bus. It was their first experience with McDonald’s — and it was in Moscow.

Of the many fine obituaries and reminiscences, this one by my friend Rush Limbaugh is the most personally moving to me, because it describes for those who may be too young to know how important Bill was in the lives of once-young conservatives. Sidenote: Rush describes his thrill at being invited to Bill’s New York home for a National Review editorial dinner. I arranged that invitation. It was a fun evening — but then they were all fun evenings.

Please Come to Maastricht

Ahoy, FrontBurnervians. I am heading to Holland next week and will be attending, TEFAF, the “World’s Leading Art and Antiques Show” in the charming town of Maastricht. Any of you know anyone from Dallas who will be tiptoeing through the tulips next week. I’ll buy you a cup of “coffee” here.

Open Mouth, Insert Foot

Dallas’ very own Adelfa Callejo is, when she’s not in front of a reporter, a very nice lady. But when the cameras are rolling, she is liable to spew forth, which she did to very great effect yesterday.

Texas GOP In Deep Doo-Doo

I agree with this analysis by the San Antonio Express-News’ Jonathon Gurwitz. The nut paragraph:

The downside for Texas Republicans, however, is that there simply is no action at the grassroots level to counter the massive organizational effort of Democrats. And that holds implications for GOP candidates up and down the ballot in November — and beyond. Republicans hold a slender 79-71 majority in the Texas House. A shift of only a handful of seats by 2010 could put the next round of redistricting in the hands of Democrats, with attendant implications for the composition of the state’s congressional delegation.

The irony: grandstanders on the immigration issue like Dallas Congressman Sam Johnson, who is at this moment running TV and radio ads on its dangers, may soon find themselves redistricted out a seat from which to grandstand — thanks to a Hispanic vote the GOP once claimed and now may have lost irretrievably. Nice long-range thinking, Sam.

Road Warrior

Nightlife Maven Kyle has had a rough start to her morning. (No, she’s not hungover … I don’t think.) She woke up to find a flat tire. Seems the pothole on Lemmon at Cole finally did her in. As Kyle describes it, the pothole is more of a torn-up patch of road that she’s hit three or four times in the past two weeks it’s been there. If you’re in the left lane, she says, it’s pretty much unavoidable.

She’s tracking down the phone number to report it to the city. But can’t she pass the bill for the new tire along to the city, too? Am I imagining that? If not, can she sue? Lawyers, speak out.

Another Day, Another Ban Handed Down from City Council

When a legislative body takes action without debate, something powerfully stupid is bound to happen. When it’s justified as “for the children” — you can bet your pretty floral bonnet that the stupid rises to epic. And here it is — Dallas adopts a cell phone ban in school zones. (Props to Dave Levinthal for an awesome lede.) I tried to point out last week the reason has nothing to do with safety since, you know, no one can point to any problem with cell phone wielding drivers running down kids in school zones. It’s really about the revenue they can raise. But as a friend notes this morning, there’s really a much bigger cost to laws like this.

Fox 4’s Lari Barager Has an Odd Sense of Humor

An alert FrontBurnervian points us to this story from Fox 4. A 27-year-old man from Pennsylvania meets a 14-year-old Bedford girl in an online video game forum. He has his brother drive him to Texas so he can have sex with the girl. And he actually winds up spending the night in the girl’s room, where he’s caught sleeping by the mom, after the girl goes to school. The guy gets charged with sexual assault.

The kicker? Reporter Lari Barager sets up her story by saying, “It would be funny if the crime weren’t so serious.”

Um, Lari? Would you like a mulligan on that one?

Big, Mysterious Announcement Coming out of DFW Airport

Normally, when someone calls a big press conference, the media all know ahead of time what’s going to be said. But they (sometime we) dutifully show up because either there are snacks to be eaten or because pictures are needed. And maybe some in the media do already know what’s going down tomorrow morning at 8:30 in Terminal D. But I don’t.

According to the invitation: “DFW will host an international announcement that will have a major impact on business and cultural exchange for Dallas and Fort Worth. The Airport’s special guests will receive a one-of-a-kind welcome from the Airport and community leaders. Due to the confidentiality of this announcement, no other details will be available prior to the event.”

In attendance will be mayors Tom Leppert and Mike Moncrief, plus various DFW Airport officials.  Also promised: “There will be high-impact colorful visuals never before seen at DFW International Airport.”

Leading Off

1. The accident that killed UNT student Ashley Parra is just unbelievably tragic.

2. Seven cars were set on fire in Oak Cliff by someone who had probably recently watched the first 20 minutes of Goodfellas. “I hope you’re satisfied,” said one victim, Carlton Johnson. “You really don’t know the kind of inconvenience you put the victims to.” I know that quote is sort of out of context. But if it were me? [Expletive deleted] would get a workout.

3. Like Vanessa WilliamsWhitney Houston (early, sorry), T. Boone Pickens believes that children are our future. Instead of writing a song, he gave $10 million (a.k.a. “walking around money”) to the Museum of Nature and Science. Gotta play to your strengths.