Re: Rating Marty Cortland
Hey, Glenn, we conduct reader research all the time and in many different ways. If the results are brutally honest, that’s perfect. But in this case, you have to remember that we’re essentially conducting a focus group. The group is one of FrontBurnervians, which certainly overlaps with our “print product” readership. But they are not the same audience. All of which is to say, this poll is just another tool — not the only tool — that we’ll use to evaluate Marty. Something like this, a back-page column, really comes down to a matter of taste. Mine, mostly. I happen to like Marty, which is why I brought him on.
I like him because he doesn’t do what most columnist do: play the everyman, beg to be liked. Marty is very much not the everyman. Because his net worth easily puts him in the top 1 percent of the country. But the themes he writes about — jealousy, greed, marital discord, the anxiety that comes from living in an environment that often seems beyond your control — are universal. Even if the details of his life cost more than the ones in your life or mine, you can still identify. And if you can’t, it’s fun to watch from the outside. Most important, Marty is a good writer.
Two final things. 1) In response to the comments on the poll post, no, Marty Cortland is not my alter ego. He’s a real person. I’ve been to his house. 2) If it helps, think of it this way: Marty Cortland isn’t Bill Cosby; he’s Bill Hicks.
15 Comments to “Re: Rating Marty Cortland”
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Who the hell is Bill Hicks?
Is Marty Cortland the guy who wrote a column about how his wife’s lust for social status never abates and is not easily appeased? And we were all supposed to chortle in a “it’s funny ‘cos it’s true” way? The column where they’re shopping for a new SUV and the godawful wife figure will settle for nothing less than a very tasteful gold-plated Lexus or something — because What Would the Neighbors Think if they got something more pedestrian? The narrator-husband quips, “But Ross Perot drives a Buick” and the wife-creature whines, “He’s a billionnaire; he can afford to drive whatever he wants.”
If so, I immediately threw that magazine in the trash and vowed never to buy it again — a vow I’m only one enticing cover story away from breaking, I’d hasten to add. Jesus, I needed a shower after that filth. I’ve never been happier not to relate.
Bill Hicks, my ass.
(But maybe I’m confusing Marty with another writer. Please advise.)
I agree that Marty’s column is enjoyable, and I’ll concede that it’s probably still finding it’s legs, but the “universal” themes are being ramped-up, column by column. You don’t go from the intiial SUV debate to the most recent column (Dec.) with the lightbulb staff and such. That’s why it seemed so over the top. It was. I did like that Marty mentioned my favorite bartender. Go Danny!. Maybe someone should stop by Biernat’s and interview Danny to see how “real” Marty Cortland is.
Bill Hicks would have verbally strung Marty C. by his manicured toenails above Beverly Drive.
And Bill Cosby would instruct Wanda Sykes to kick Marty’s ass.
I knew Bill Hicks. And Marty Cortland is no Bill Hicks.
In all modesty, I would like to point out that my net worth ranks close to the bottom of the top 1 percent — verily, midway down the stairs to the basement — so I think it’s fair to say that I identify with the “everyman” ethos.
An interesting non-denial denial. Let’s interpret Tim’s post:
“1) In response to the comments on the poll post, no, Marty Cortland is not my alter ego.”
Translation: “Marty Cortland is not my alter ago, I merely use that name as a pseudonym.”
“He’s a real person.”
Translation: “I know he’s a real person, because he is me.”
“I’ve been to his house.”
Translation: “I’ve been to his house. In fact, I sleep there with my family every night.”
“Most important, Marty is a good writer.”
Translation: “I rule.”
A final thought: If Marty is “real” (i.e. not Tim’s sock puppet), why does the link in his name up above merely link to the D homepage? Why not link to, say, an email address? Hmmm?
There’s a gmail address for “Marty” on a few of the columns - but no “Cortland” in the databases one would use to find someone.
I vote sock puppet (and a dull one at that).
I just assumed Marty was Reid Slaughter. I don’t think Tim would write anything that unfunny. No offense, Reid.
And no Cortland in DCAD’s database. Course, he’s so rich that his estate probably is owned by one of his many companies.
So let me get this right? Marty Cortland is in the bottom of the top 1 percent and he is not the everyman, but he writes about universal themes….. sounds to me Tim that what you’ve got here is Steve Blow with lots of money….IJS
Marty=Wick.
Marty Courtland is Stanley Bing’s pseudonym, as Fortune Magazine is very litigious.
If this is a poll of sorts for Marty Courtland, count me amongst his fans. I am a commoner, but can still appreciate this rich man’s humor.
By the way, comparing Marty to Stanley Bing is a compliment of the highest order.
And Stanley Bing is Gil Schwartz.