RUN FOR COVER!

If someone reads this message, please tell my wife and children that I love them. The wintry mix is nigh upon us! Surely if I’m fortunate enough to wake on the morrow, the byways of this fair city shall be so covered with the frozen ice cold water stuff that I shant be able to venture out. I fear I’ve not procured enough potable water nor foodstuffs to survive the chill. This may very well be my last blog post. Pray for me.

ANOTHER SALE

It’s that time of year and I feel it’s my duty to report the best sales happening in Dallas. So, here is another one happening right now.
Stanley Korshak is having a men’s clothing sale. Get 30% off of suits, sport coats, and pants from designers such as Brioni, Oxxford, Ralph Lauren, and Armani Collezioni. Head over to The Shak for more savings on Etro and Valentino.
By the way, don’t miss our January issue (not out until the end of December), which will tell you about the best of the best sales happening in the new year.

RE: LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

I had lunch today with a real estate tycoon who told me that there were “four times as many residential foreclosures in Dallas this year than last.” She attributed climbing adjustable mortgages held by two-income couples, many of whom could not only carry the payment but were also divorcing. But I’d like to ask the nice lady who wrote Adam how she managed to get a $1,300 electric bill on a 2,000 square foot house. Did she close her doors when the AC was on? I had a poorly insulated 2,000 square foot house with 50-year old windows and even with my unit on most of the time, my bill never approached a third of that. IJS.

RE: THE HOLIDAY HAWK

I sent the Holiday Hawk link to my buddy Rel over at Wild Birds Unlimited on Lovers. Rel is a master at identifying birds and fixing feeders. Here’s his take:

We looked at the video and determined it is a hawk. I do not think however that it is a native. The facial pattern and very short tail don’t match anything in the North American guides.

Hmm. Stumped Rel? Off to the Internet I go. Don’t you love birding? [Down, Timmy] Just one of those great puzzles of nature. Anybody seen goldfinches yet? WTF!

IS MARK CUBAN THINKING ABOUT BUYING BELO?

On his blog, Cuban has a post titled “The Google Brilliance applied to Newspapers and Local Media.” He’s noodling on the value of old-school newspapers–a value that he says those very newspapers are missing. And Wick told me yesterday that “some business guy” told him there were some murmurs about Belo possibly being bought, which this “business guy” said explained Belo’s recent modest gain on the stock market. How’s that for solid, sourced-up, hardcore analysis with multiple sources? You heard it here first.

RE: WICK

Jim, a FBvian with some time on his hands sends along an image of Wick for you. I’m sure our art department has better images on file, ones where the bow tie is actually spinning. Again, just let us know.

LETTERS TO OTHER EDITORS

Been a while, hasn’t it? But here’s another letter written by an area magazine reader. This time, the magazine is Business 2.0, and the letter is about a November feature on “The New Rules of Real Estate”:

I know exactly why foreclosures are sky-high in the Dallas-Fort Worth area: We don’t have state income taxes, which means property taxes are really high and homeowners don’t get state mortgage deductions on April 15. I just bought a 2,000-square-foot home in North Dallas for $170,000. The property taxes alone are almost $7,000. On top of that, I just paid a $1,300 electricity bill for the summer. The cost of living around here is unreal, so I can see how local homeowners are struggling in a soft market.

Lynn Schmollinger
North Dallas, TX

Excellent points, Lynn. That electricity bill sounds like a doozy.

WICK’S GOOD SIDE

Hey, Jim, just let us know if, for your column, you need a photo of Wick grinning with his bow tie in flames.

HOW TO GET THE NEW RECYCLING BLUE BIN

I’d heard about the new alley bins and was looking forward to getting mine. Then an alert FBvian told me this morning that the bin doesn’t just show up; you have to register for it. If you live in Dallas, here’s how to get yours. No thanks necessary. Just here to help.

RICHARD COLLINS IS NO FAN OF HILLARY CLINTON

A politically aware FrontBurnervian points out today’s NYT story about Richard Collins. The wealthy businessman from Dallas is the principal figure behind an anti-Hillary site called Stop Her Now. The NYT story notes Collins is also a major contributor to Rudy Giuliani.

LAURA HAS A SECRET LOVER

And it’s not the Holiday Hawk, it’s a real person. She just received a gianormous arrangement of flowers from Park Cities Petals with a note signed “from your secret lover.” I’ve called the florist to make sure they were actually for Laura—I mean they could have gotten her confused with me—but they haven’t called back. Developing. Meanwhile, Holiday Hawk fans are flooding my inbox with other performances of the Holiday Hawk. I just love it.

RE: ADAM … COLD PIZZA

I just caught the replay of my appearance on ESPN2’s Cold Pizza. Coupla things:

1. I wish they’d told me I was going to be on split-screen. I might have looked a tad more interested while that Jay dude was talking.

2. Double-chin and snaggletooth much? New Year’s resolutions start early for me this year.

3. The ID they ran of me was not at all my fault. I am not “Executive Editor, D Magazine.” I told them time and again: It’s “Publisher.”

4. Host Jay used my line about Romo being a good listener who likes to cuddle to segue to Skip Bayless. Nancy probably has something to say about that.

THE HOLIDAY HAWK

Last night I’m watching a great Law and Order rerun (is that redundant?) about three kinky party girls on trial for raping a male stripper, when a commercial comes on. Before I could hit mute, I get hooked. Why? Cuz, it’s way funny. But here’s the deal—I don’t think that is a hawk. It looks more like a falcon or osprey. I’m gonna get right on this. Developing.

RE: KUNKLE-DODD REGISTRY

FrontBurnervians love/hate this couple’s taste in china. Here are several responses from readers:

“FINALLY, someone typing what we’re all thinking! Mein Gott! You’d never guess with that list that he bought the ring at deBoulle.” “At least they know they’re going to get the hand blender. Police chef needs a stiff margarita after a hard day at the office.” “The sheets are nice.” “Kunkle’s only been married three times.” [Four according to Timmy.] “Weird how the date on the registry lists “the event” as happening on March 31, 2007.”

What. Ever. It’s not like this stuff is flying off the shelves with the wedding so close. They still need eight soup bowls and we have a wintry mix on the horizon.

RE: DMN, MARK DAVIS

Tim is right to point out (a) that linking to the techno-mess that is the DMN website would be an unfriendly act on our part and (b) the Mark Davis column on Farmers Branch councilmember and Bavarian boot stomper avatar Tim O’Hare is worth a read.

However–and I never tire of this reference–it’s also worth paraphrasing what Trotsky once said of American critic Dwight McDonald: Everyone has a right to be stupid, but Mark Davis abuses the privilege.

RE: ADAM … COLD PIZZA

Is Cold Pizza eligible for a Katie Award?

ADAM DIGS HIS TEETH INTO COLD PIZZA

I’m fishing for reports of Adam’s just-completed appearance on the ESPN show. If you saw it, hit me up. A FrontBurnervian who has details of the gig–actually, Adam–says that they identified Adam as “executive editor of Dallas Magazine,” which sounds like a magazine we ought to start. And the host suggested that viewers should check out “Adam’s blog, FrontBurner at dmagazine.com.” Thanks for letting me post on your blog, Adam.

WHY YOU SHOULD READ THE PAPER THIS MORNING

Forgive me for not providing links to these stories. I refuse to visit the Morning News‘ horrid new web site. But the paper this morning is filled with good stuff. For as much as we highlight their failings, I feel compelled to point out when they succeed:
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BE AFRAID, BE VERY AFRAID

I have two words for you this morning, and if they don’t make your spleen quiver and stiffen the short hairs on the back of your neck, then you’re not a true North Texan. Those two words: “wintry mix.”